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I'm friends with a married couple who hate each other. They haven't had sex in three years, he asked for a divorce around Christmas; she cried, caved. She can't stand him either but she knows where her bread is buttered and lives a pretty good life. He gave her a time limit to get a job she now has a part time job.
The kids are in 8 th grade and aside from little side jobs she hasn't done much out of the house.
He has flat out said he hates her and in 5 years, he doesn't care he's getting a divorce. In 5 years she'll be 50 and he'll be 53.
Btw the kids are HUGELY affected but cry every time they fight because they don't want them to divorce.
Is he doing an injustices to her knowing he going to leave? I would think so.
Interesting. I don't know anyone who would say: I am divorcing you in... 5 years.
If they hate each other and fight all the time, then why wait? Kids are old enough to understand, and they suffer too, when parents fight. Prolonging the misery isn't going to do any good to anyone.
I'm friends with a married couple who hate each other. They haven't had sex in three years, he asked for a divorce around Christmas; she cried, caved. She can't stand him either but she knows where her bread is buttered and lives a pretty good life. He gave her a time limit to get a job she now has a part time job.
The kids are in 8 th grade and aside from little side jobs she hasn't done much out of the house.
He has flat out said he hates her and in 5 years, he doesn't care he's getting a divorce. In 5 years she'll be 50 and he'll be 53.
Btw the kids are HUGELY affected but cry every time they fight because they don't want them to divorce.
Is he doing an injustices to her knowing he going to leave? I would think so.
Thoughts??
Not enough info here. What do you see as an injustice: the fact that he's sticking around for 5 years? It doesn't make sense.
He would still owe child support. She would be able to support the kids on his child support, and she can support herself, minimally, on the part-time job. Are they renting? Making mortgage payments? She should get a lawyer.
If they continue this miserable situation for 5 years, they'll drive each other crazy, and it will be much more damaging to the kids than making a clean break ASAP would.
Interesting. I don't know anyone who would say: I am divorcing you in... 5 years.
If they hate each other and fight all the time, then why wait? Kids are old enough to understand, and they suffer too, when parents fight. Prolonging the misery isn't going to do any good to anyone.
A friend of mine's wife said basically the same thing. She said she wanted a divorce when the kids left for college. He thought about it, and realized it didn't make any sense to wait. They are now divorced, and he is happier than ever. Best thing, though, is that his relationship with his ex-wife is vastly improved, and his relationship with his kids is terrific. Staying together in a miserable relationship is NEVER good for the children. Never.
She doesn't know he's planning on filing in 5 years he's basically buying his time to not pay CS I guess. But, all the long she's doing what he asked thinking all is well but in the end will be served with the divorce. Idk I think he's leading her on this false type security. They still don't have sex and BOTH are at fault for their issues. He refuses to go to counseling because he knows he's going to leave. That's why I'm asking, is this an injustice to her??
I'm friends with a married couple who hate each other. They haven't had sex in three years, he asked for a divorce around Christmas; she cried, caved. She can't stand him either but she knows where her bread is buttered and lives a pretty good life. He gave her a time limit to get a job she now has a part time job.
The kids are in 8 th grade and aside from little side jobs she hasn't done much out of the house.
He has flat out said he hates her and in 5 years, he doesn't care he's getting a divorce. In 5 years she'll be 50 and he'll be 53.
Btw the kids are HUGELY affected but cry every time they fight because they don't want them to divorce.
Is he doing an injustices to her knowing he going to leave? I would think so.
Thoughts??
He needs to just get off his arse, move out, hire a lawyer, and file.
This is is EXACTLY the kind of garbage I mean when I say that many, if not most, divorced men procrastinate. A certain group of men like to get on here complaining that women are usually the ones to file. This is a perfect example of why. This man will continue to make everyone's life a living hell in that family when he KNOWS he wants a divorce but is too damn lazy to actually set it into motion. Instead, he's going to threaten, warn, and give five-year limits.
You know why? Do the math. The kids are in 8th grade. That makes them 13. This guy just doesn't want to pay child support, so he's going to wait until they are 18 and considered legal adults.
It's about money. That's all this is. He needs to nut up and get it over with, instead of putting his children through this. What an ass.
I hope his wife files first, puts it in the agreement that he has to pay for the kids' college, and then the kids get into Harvard and Yale.
She doesn't know he's planning on filing in 5 years he's basically buying his time to not pay CS I guess. But, all the long she's doing what he asked thinking all is well but in the end will be served with the divorce. Idk I think he's leading her on this false type security. They still don't have sex and BOTH are at fault for their issues. He refuses to go to counseling because he knows he's going to leave. That's why I'm asking, is this an injustice to her??
He sounds like a stand up guy. Sarcasm.
That is a cruel mental game he's playing. He's putting the wife and kids through hell for money.
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