Guys what do you think if a guy says " if ever we were going to get married" ? (dating, long-term)
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My great bf took a day off today to spend the whole day with me. While we were having meaningful conversations about relationships, life etc he said " If ever we were going to get married...." then he added stuff that he would like us to keep doing what are doing now like being able to comminicate openly, spending time with our friends and family etc. My bf is aware that I turned down an ex bf who proposed to me ( reason why I broke up with him).
Im into my bf, he is great and I love spending time with him. Im just wondering why did he say " if we were going to get married"? Was he thinking about marriage? He adores me and he shows it every possible way he can. Just wondering what others think about it. Thanks.
He's trying to gauge your interest since he knows you dumped the last guy who proposed and he doesn't want to lose you by taking a chance. So he's trying to see if you responded positively to it.
When a guy makes a comment like that, it means he sees a possible long term future with you.
Yup. When hubby and I were dating he brought up the topic exactly like the OP's bf did. He said, "If we ever got married..."
When he said that, my face was but inside I was lol
OP, listen to your bf. Most men wouldn't say that if they weren't serious about the relationship. Since he knows why you broke up with your last bf, you may want to have a serious conversation with him just to be sure about what he meant with that comment.
If a guy mentions marriage, it's a good idea to listen to him and respond appropriately.
It is and it makes us think Wow finally the man actually brought up the future talk first this time and not the woman as typically expected. It's almost always the women being ready first, expressing feelings about love, commitment and marriage and hardly ever a man. Suddenly when you're reading about a man who does it, then it's a big surprise to us. I would call him a special breed and sadly those breeds are dying. We need to keep them alive.
I truly envy you women who have men like these. They are harder to find. Some of us don't even get anywhere closer to a man bringing up the marriage talk, not much proposing.
As for the previous marriage proposal decline, I can imagine that would be a big blow to any man. It's not easy after all for them to take that plunge and ask esp if they think the response will always be a yes, only for it to be a no. Don't think I would have it in me to do that to a man but if hypothetically speaking I was in a long-term relationship and not really (very unlikely but if), then I think accepting it but postponing would be a better option.
OP, sane and reasonable people discuss the terms of marriage, their expectations, whether or not they even want to get married, starting well before the actual proposal. It's part pf making sure that you suit each other.
It's beyond me why any man would propose to a woman when he doesn't even know whether she wants to get married or not or whether or not she would consider marrying him. That would be like proposing marriage to someone who is virtually a stranger.
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but inside I was 
