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Preface: If you are content with the amount of people you attract, you can skip this post.
I've been spending the past week, more accurately, the past 25 years thinking about what makes me so upset about rejection. And I think I finally came to a good answer.
There exists a hierarchy in this world. There's no question about it. And it really has nothing to do with what kind of a person you are. It has to do with what you can give people.
If you are good looking, you can fulfill lust. If you are fun or interesting, you can fulfill excitement, and if you have a good income, you fulfill security. These are the traits of a desirable mate.
But you say, "I'm a nice guy/gal and I try hard with people, but I have little success. Maybe I'm ugly. Maybe I'm boring. Maybe I'm too poor or unsuccessful."
And I say you're none of that. You don't need to be funnier, smoother, to get a new haircut, to dress better, to have a better paying job, or plastic surgery (although you can do those things if YOU want). You just have to take yourself out of the competition.
And it goes beyond romance. Jobs, friends, etc. People are not just going to give jobs or be friends with 'nice' people. They want people who can give them things. People who will bring in clients and make them money. People who will entertain them and introduce them to new people. People who will be worthy of their precious time. I say, take yourself out of that competition. Just be yourself and try your best.
Yourself might be a 55 year old who lives with his elderly parents. Will you ever find a woman? Probably not. But just be happy with yourself and try and be a good person. Watch sports, eat ice cream, hike and ski. Whatever.
It doesn't mean give up on dating. Just give up on the competitive part of it. In order to do that, you must give up on the competitive parts of every other part of life because they are all connected. The big house, the fancy car, the big social circle, the big fancy wedding. Women reject you, people don't want to be friends with you? Scr@w it. Just be yourself and try and be happy with the results.
I'm dateless pretty much all the time, not just v day. I'm just ducky with this fact too, because I have a VERY low tolerance for drama or bull**** which weeds most women out as a prospective date. As a result I may not have many dates, but I have a whole lot less stress.
I guess raena, but I think there's one of the emotional difference between men and women. Women usually have a continual need to be loved, and SOME men don't have this need and get along fine without it.
I guess raena, but I think there's one of the emotional difference between men and women. Women usually have a continual need to be loved, and SOME men don't have this need and get along fine without it.
Not true my father was sad if he wasn't feeling the love. My brother upset if he was taken for granted. I think many men like to be loved and appreciated.
Not true my father was sad if he wasn't feeling the love. My brother upset if he was taken for granted. I think many men like to be loved and appreciated.
Sorry, I guess I'm different. I feel suffocated by most women.
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