What was missing in your failed relationship, based on this theory? (marriage, love)

[srjth]

The Triangular Theory of Love



I've always liked this theory. Here's short description of what makes up the 3 components of consummate love:

1. Intimacy – Which encompasses feelings of attachment, closeness, connectedness, and bondedness.
2. Passion – Which encompasses drives connected to both limerence and sexual attraction.
3. Commitment – Which encompasses, in the short term, the decision to remain with another, and in the long term, plans made with that other.

If you want more description, here's the longer link:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triangular_theory_of_love

So, which component(s) was/is missing in your current or failed relationship?

In my marriage, it was intimacy that was missing.

(PS- sorry the picture is so big)

[JJS99]

None of it.

What was missing was things like either respect/support, compatibility of personality, or compatibility of demeanor.

[srjth]

If you stretch your mind, everything could fall into one of those 3 categories.

[Artifice32]

Originally Posted by srjth

The Triangular Theory of Love



(PS- sorry the picture is so big)

I like this theory. Let's see, I had to look up Fatuous Love because the concept was odd to me. The wikipedia article described it as jumping into marriage because of the passion. So, I would toss in a lot of celebrities into this category. I've never experienced it, thankfully. I've experienced Romantic love with varying degrees of passion and intimacy. I would say my first love was in the high passion modest intimacy but no commitment on either of our parts. Everything after that has been some passion and some intimacy but the commitment angle has always been off. So, I would say for me commitment has been off but, but, but I don't plan on having children so that might be the reason why.

[Artifice32]

Originally Posted by JJS99

None of it.

What was missing was things like either respect/support, compatibility of personality, or compatibility of demeanor.

I think that all falls into intimacy.

[mainebrokerman]

being a triangle with three points,,is this a threesome?

[kat247]

Originally Posted by srjth

If you stretch your mind, everything could fall into one of those 3 categories.

A bit of all of it.

[srjth]

Originally Posted by mainebrokerman

being a triangle with three points,,is this a threesome?

Nope, it's my serious post.

Originally Posted by Artifice32

I think that all falls into intimacy.

I agree, but I didn't want to say. People are so touchy around here.

[Marylandkitten]

Your triangle logic is flawed. Mine was missing trust.

[srjth]

Originally Posted by Marylandkitten

Your triangle logic is flawed. Mine was missing trust.

Trust is in the intimacy part. (you have to read the article links to get that)