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You need to establish a rapport with someone before asking them to coffee.
I had that happen to me in the grocery store once. A guy appeared at my side, and said "would you like to get a cup of coffee" before I had even turned to look at him. I was married then so that wasn't happening, but at the same time, all I had was what he looked like in that moment and he was asking something of me. If we'd met in the checkout line and chatted a little, and I got a feel for his personality/sense of humour (and I was single) that might have worked. But just to walk up to a complete stranger and ask them out, no.
I mean, it's not really something I do often.
I get rejected by women I've known way better and with way more rapport over a way longer time. So, what are the chances that you're going to be able to pull it off with some random woman staring at frozen yogurt that you know nothing about?
Add to that the fact that I've never gotten a woman from a bar/club and I've tried that a lot. I think that has better odds than true cold approach too.
As a guy, I think you have to look at different approaches odds wise. How many women am I going to have to go through to get a chance? Is that approach worth it for me?
By the way, I really don't consider meetups cold approach. Cold approach means you are on your own in the middle of humanity, you haven't seen her before, you walk on over, take a breath, and start yapping.
You need to establish a rapport with someone before asking them to coffee.
I had that happen to me in the grocery store once. A guy appeared at my side, and said "would you like to get a cup of coffee" before I had even turned to look at him. I was married then so that wasn't happening, but at the same time, all I had was what he looked like in that moment and he was asking something of me. If we'd met in the checkout line and chatted a little, and I got a feel for his personality/sense of humour (and I was single) that might have worked. But just to walk up to a complete stranger and ask them out, no.
What types of women are you looking for that they're irritable?
It makes sense to try to make connections with people even if they're not your "type" or you don't think you are. Connections and relationships make life go.
Blah. I mostly prefer keeping to myself or with my kind. Sensitive intellectuals tend to be grumpy much of the time, especially when forced to interact with those they don't already know and like. The success rate of cold-approaching someone like me (male or female) is almost zero.
I've read material on it, but it just feels awkward to me going up to someone you don't know with the intention of getting her number and asking her out. Even though I prefer the idea of cold approaching a woman, it seems like social circle (or asking friends if they know any attractive women looking for a relationship), and parties/events/clubs/bars is really the way to go cause those are socially acceptable places to try to talk to women (even if you don't know them).
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NewYorker11356
I've read material on it, but it just feels awkward to me going up to someone you don't know with the intention of getting her number and asking her out.
That's why you don't have that as your intention. You just chat and take it from there.
lol...majority of females claims to have cold approached a guy...
I have never seen that in real life.
If you read them though, most of us said we didn't proposition them, we just started conversation. For instance, if the guy was wearing a football jersey, I'd make a comment about his team, things like that. You've never seen a woman start a conversation with a stranger? Maybe you saw them talking and assumed they already knew each other? No one said they're going up and saying "Heeeyyyy, good looking!"
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