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Oh, yeah, that's a manifestation of an issue in his head. Heaven forbid you focus on something else besides him. I can see why you split up with him.
But that reminds me of another NO: Men who only touch or demonstrate affection when they want sex, like every kiss begins a lay. NO, NO, and again, NO.
I think it was actually he who had a low libido but to save face he acted all horney when he knew it wasn't going to play out.
Oh, yeah, that's a manifestation of an issue in his head. Heaven forbid you focus on something else besides him. I can see why you split up with him.
But that reminds me of another NO: Men who only touch or demonstrate affection when they want sex, like every kiss begins a lay. NO, NO, and again, NO.
This is a fine line. Too much touch, she wants to be left alone. Not enough, and she's not "warmed up" yet.
This was an issue in a previous long term relationship for me - not so much in my marriage, since we're more 'in tune' in that regard.
I think it is women who are exhausted because they have all that to do after 8+ hours at their paying job. Its more their partners attitude and lack of involvement in their home life and their frustration with that than actual exhaustion.
I cant say I have ever heard any of my female friends say they were too exhausted for sex on any regular basis.
Plenty of men take care of many of the home needs as well, and still face that issue.
The real reason is that women need more time to "refocus" and relax enough to be receptive to intimacy, where men, well, we can almost flip a switch.
I think it is women who are exhausted because they have all that to do after 8+ hours at their paying job. Its more their partners attitude and lack of involvement in their home life and their frustration with that than actual exhaustion.
I cant say I have ever heard any of my female friends say they were too exhausted for sex on any regular basis.
Yep. It's not the norm any more than lousy relationships are the norm.
Honestly? Things have to be pretty bad relationship-wise for me to not want it. I really don't understand how any healthy, red-blooded woman could not want the peen, just in general. Ain't nothin' like a man who can eff the sass outta ya, IMHO.
The irony is that good sex (not just sex, but good sex where both partners are left cross-eyed like, "What just happened?") really is the tie that binds: I'll forgive a myriad of petty annoyances if the nookie is regular and good.
This is a fine line. Too much touch, she wants to be left alone. Not enough, and she's not "warmed up" yet.
This was an issue in a previous long term relationship for me - not so much in my marriage, since we're more 'in tune' in that regard.
Everyone has a different level of comfort with physical affection. I'm fairly low-touch, myself. But if the only time he touches or kisses me is if he wants sex, there's going to be a problem.
Granted, I have more male friends than female friends, but with my girlfriends, I really don't talk about men's libedos or make fun of them. Actually, we hardly ever talk about sex. I think that's a myth perpetuated by TV and entertainment. Actually, I think the jokes about men are a myth also perpetucated by TV and entertainment as well.
I'd say this is rather the result of many singles being also widowed or single without anyone involved or in casual relationships, while plenty of "married" people are having sex because they are raised to think that they HAVE to have sex X times per week or something like that. I.e. having sex each saturday even if they aren't into it, but they feel that they should do it out of some obligation.
Generally, I would say for the most part, because of evolution or biological necessity, women (generally, not all the time), tend to connect the emotional aspects with sex (whether or not it may be pheromone based initial attraction).
Me personally, seeing some hot guy with a nice a$$ giving me a laptdance does nothing for me. I need the emotional and mental stimulation- I need that "feeling" to get from A to B to even think about a guy in that way. Perhaps, it's my innate need to want to find a mate suitable for something long-term for survival and not just a random alpha dud who randomly humps and dumps from chick to chick.
Some women don't feel the need for the secure bonding. They rather have sex with random guys without the emotional but I think they too also feel attached to some degree and prefer the emotional depth.
That's the thing. That emotional high, that feeling, that bonding, really only exists at the beginning of a relationship. Then, the relationship evolves to a level where there is a mutual love and respect. Therefore, the man, still stimulated sexually by women in general, and, his own wife, still wants sex, but she, loving this man, but, the euphoria of the emotional and mental stimulation inherent early in a relationship having worn off, has no desire anymore, even though she'd never think of leaving him.
How can a man create that euphoria in a woman who has known him and been with him for 10 years? There's nothing "new" he can do or show her that she hasn't seen before.
while plenty of "married" people are having sex because they are raised to think that they HAVE to have sex X times per week or something like that. I.e. having sex each saturday even if they aren't into it, but they feel that they should do it out of some obligation.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TimR76
How can a man create that euphoria in a woman who has known him and been with him for 10 years? There's nothing "new" he can do or show her that she hasn't seen before.
New isn't always better. Great head from an old comfortable partner is always more fun than stumbling this won't get me off head from a new partner.
You do it by doing and experiencing different things in life.
You can't expect to be "interesting" if all you do is the same song and dance. You are not learning or growing as an individual...you "are" boring
Would you go see the same movie every night for the rest of you life and still enjoy it just as well as you did the first time 20 years later?
Last edited by rego00123; 04-09-2014 at 01:42 PM..
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I can see why you split up with him.
I am not married, but I think married women have sex with their husbands considering married people have sex more often than singles. 
That's a real scary thought.
