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Location: Fort Bend County, TX/USA/Mississauga, ON/Canada
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Yay or nay. My cousin who is married watches porn with her husband. She said they enjoy it & it's a form of "recreation" for them, she also said that she learns a lot of different positions from it. Also, my friend & her boyfriend watch it frequently, yet they are pretty sexually adventurous....
I don't know how I feel about this...I once watched porn with my DH (back when we were dating) & he was turned on, but too focused on the chick in the film. So we didn't do it again...there are tons of articles on the subject....including this one that I read recently: Why Couples Who Confess To Watching Porn Are Happier And Have Better Relationships
anyways, what are your thoughts? Biggie or no biggie?
I did with my college sweetheart. We picked up a few moves that way. This was back in the 80s, though, when mainstream porn was a bit more tame.
My ex-hub didn't have too much interest in it. He didn't like anything that could be considered degrading to women, and was more into high-quality, non-explicit nudes. I think his most cherished image was a still of Charlize Theron in Cider House Rules. If you've seen the movie or care to do an image search (not at work!), you'll see it's a positively beautiful image. Unfortunately, I was a bit insecure and intimidated because his taste was so refined.
A couple of guys I dated would freak out at the mere suggestion of watching it together. Granted, this is an N of 2 from among all the relationships I've had, but I doubt it's a coincidence that they were both bossy, spoiled, somewhat callous people who had problems with emotional intimacy and vulnerability.
So for me, if he doesn't want to check any of it out with me even when he knows I'm game for it, it's a bit of a yellow flag.
I did with my college sweetheart. We picked up a few moves that way. This was back in the 80s, though, when mainstream porn was a bit more tame.
My ex-hub didn't have too much interest in it. He didn't like anything that could be considered degrading to women, and was more into high-quality, non-explicit nudes. I think his most cherished image was a still of Charlize Theron in Cider House Rules. If you've seen the movie or care to do an image search (not at work!), you'll see it's a positively beautiful image. Unfortunately, I was a bit insecure and intimidated because his taste was so refined.
A couple of guys I dated would freak out at the mere suggestion of watching it together. Granted, this is an N of 2 from among all the relationships I've had, but I doubt it's a coincidence that they were both bossy, spoiled, somewhat callous people who had problems with emotional intimacy and vulnerability.
So for me, if he doesn't want to check any of it out with me even when he knows I'm game for it, it's a bit of a yellow flag.
Personally, I think it's a bad idea. The actors and actresses will almost inevitably be more handsome/beautiful, and better endowed, than you and your partner are. As well, they will be "better" at whatever activities they are doing. (They are, after all, "professionals" who are paid to possess these attributes and talents.) Ladies, do you really want your boyfriends/husbands to be comparing your looks and abilities (even subconsciously) with the girls on the screen? Because 99 times out of 100, you will come out in second place.
Human beings have figured out how to be proficient on the basic mechanics of sexual intimacy, as well as a wide range of variations, for many thousands of years now, without any outside assistance. I'm sure that with a little practice and experimentation, you can too.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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On random occasion, sure, don't particular care for it as a routine. It's a eh, I could take it or leave it thing... and generally I'm now more on the leave it side.
While I'm guilty of having watched porn -- and therefore acknowledge that this is hypocritical -- watching porn with or without a significant other is long-term bad. It's OK if you do it like once in a blue moon, but otherwise no. As bus man said, the problems are obvious. You get unrealistic expectations of how attractive people will be and what they will do and what is normal as a reaction. People always make fun of the "yeah, the pizza guy is not going to come over and open the box and his ding-dong is there and you get excited" scenario, but it's more than that. It's how the women on there are basically receptive to anything (because they're paid to be). So I'm sure that when a real-life woman is not into something, it's like "whaaaaa?? How can this be?? Time to dump you." I've seen lots of critiques (mostly from women, lol, but it's true) about how there's no intimacy, either, because you have to show stuff. In porn, you have to show the guy's ding-dong going into the woman, so they always take these poses where it's possible for the camera to see. If you do that in real life, it's like "uh, what's going on?" Or how they always "shoot" on the woman's face and back, which I'm pretty sure most women in real life are not into at all. And I haven't done any scientific research on this, but the amount of women in real life who are into BJs (hope I can say that, this post is getting sort of raunchy, sorry) is pretty low from what I can tell. Even comedians joke about how, as soon as a woman gets married she's like "whew, thank God I don't have to do that any more." But you'd think watching porn that not only do women all love it, but they like having their head grabbed and the guy ram their head back and forth on it violently.
So, bottom line, porn is obviously a huge industry and not going anywhere, but I can't say that it's particularly good or healthy to be watching.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sobaloba
And I haven't done any scientific research on this, but the amount of women in real life who are into BJs (hope I can say that, this post is getting sort of raunchy, sorry) is pretty low from what I can tell.
Well, not scientific research like the kind you've done, where you said -- and this is true, everyone -- that the majority of gay men don't perform anal sex while lots of straight men do. That's science! Mwah ha ha ha!
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