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So I have had a crush or maybe an infatuation rather for nearly 9 months now for this guy I met at college this year. He is not my type AT ALL, and I am certainly not his. We have become pretty good friends, seeing each other everyday and hanging out together 1-3 times a week with another mutual friend.
Long story short, he has sent me mixed signals all year such as: touching me slightly, wanting to hang out together (but never without our mutual friend), talking to me instead of others even if they initiated the conversation and I am just listening, always sitting with me at lunch, going out of his way to speak to me, body language, etc.. I am pretty sure (but not certain) he has liked our mutual friend this entire time, but he has still been flirty with me.
Anyways, he is graduating very soon, and will be moving back home which is about 3,000 miles away. I will likely never see him again. He has no idea I have felt this way about him this entire time, and I would like to tell him before he graduates. Not because I have any hope for a future relationship with him, but just to get this weight off my chest. When I tell him, I want it to be short and as painless as possible, and I do not really want to get any feedback on how he feels (because I'm pretty sure, even with all the mixed signals, he does not feel the same).
How can I go about doing this? What should I say??
Please help me! I am running out of time.
Graduating "very soon"? "Running out of time"? The semester has barely started. When is he graduating?
My take on his behavior is that he likes you, but it's more subconscious, because he already has a gf (right?). I wouldn't make a big declaration of it. (BTW, when he goes back home, where will his gf go? Is she going with him?) I'd only suggest staying in touch, and maybe give him your email address if he doesn't have it. When having this convo, you might say something like, "Maybe I'll be out your way sometime, while job-hunting, you never know!" And see how he reacts. If he encourages you to get in touch or to visit, that's a good sign.
So you don't want a relationship and you don't want any feedback. So why exactly do you want to even say anything? Just let it go and forget about him. If it's been nine months and this is all that's transpired then he has no romantic interest, believe me.
"He is not my type at all" But then you want to be with him before he graduates and goes home?
Does this make sense in any kind of logical way?
If you just want to knock boots, knock boots, get it out of your system just to say "Yeah, we did that". If you want a relationship, then I'd look elsewhere.
I just don't understand why someone would say, "They aren't my type" but "I'm infatuated with them" in the same paragraph.
I agree with Zeurich in that I don't see a point in telling him if you don't anticipate anything coming out of it. I certainly liked guys before but didn't tell them if there was not going to be any future in it. Whatever the result, the departure will be awkward for him if you tell him. I don't think you want to confess really unless you think there is SOME chance he feels the same way. Then what? You never see the relationship out, or you do long-distance? Neither are ideal.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Memphis1979
I just don't understand why someone would say, "They aren't my type" but "I'm infatuated with them" in the same paragraph.
Yeah really. I used to think I had a "type" but I really don't, other than someone who I'm attracted to and is nice and fairly intelligent.
Graduating "very soon"? "Running out of time"? The semester has barely started. When is he graduating?
My take on his behavior is that he likes you, but it's more subconscious, because he already has a gf (right?). I wouldn't make a big declaration of it. (BTW, when he goes back home, where will his gf go? Is she going with him?) I'd only suggest staying in touch, and maybe give him your email address if he doesn't have it. When having this convo, you might say something like, "Maybe I'll be out your way sometime, while job-hunting, you never know!" And see how he reacts. If he encourages you to get in touch or to visit, that's a good sign.
He only needed one more class this semester and it is only 9 weeks long.
No he does not have a girl friend. What I meant was that I thought he liked our mutual friend we hang out with together. I would love to date him, the only reason I don't expect a relationship is that he is moving away.
He only needed one more class this semester and it is only 9 weeks long.
No he does not have a girl friend. What I meant was that I thought he liked our mutual friend we hang out with together. I would love to date him, the only reason I don't expect a relationship is that he is moving away.
Like I said, if you just want to knock boots to have a memory, then by all means do that. You don't need conformation of others if that is what you're wanting to do. If you want someone to say, "Oh I'm sure he will fall madly in love with you and you will have your own "sleepless in Seattle" story, its not likely, but hell has frozen over before.
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