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You're not telling me anything I don't already know, because I already know that the average girl has significantly better luck at attracting men and getting dates offered to her on OLD sites. You could put up one pic, and have a completely blank profile, and I bet you that you'd still get a steady flow of messages from all sorts of guys.
I wasn't bragging. I'm just saying that I don't go through a lengthy screening process before meeting guys since the OP is curious about how OLD works.
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In the past week on OKC, I think I got one "Like" and no messages initiated towards me. Not even the fat, unattractive girls send messages my way on the reg. Women will always have an advantage at this game.
I don't think you should take it personally. It's rare for me to initiate contact even if I really like the guy's profile.
I don't think you should take it personally. It's rare for me to initiate contact even if I really like the guy's profile.
I would be lying if I said it didn't suck. But it is what it is and I'm not angry about it (more disappointed than anything; I really thought it would be a good option for someone like me). OLD takes a particular skill set, or personality type, to be really good at it IMO. I've had some dates on there, but I think the men who are most successful at it seem to be a lot less reserved or introverted than me. They're the types that don't give a crap about anything and will say anything to impress a woman. I'm more of a "I'd like to get to know you, put my feelers out, let a relationship naturally develop". Someone like me just doesn't keep up with the pace of OLD. I did almost have something good with this one girl, but I decided to pursue another girl which ended up not working out in the end anyway.
I would be lying if I said it didn't suck. But it is what it is and I'm not angry about it (more disappointed than anything; I really thought it would be a good option for someone like me). OLD takes a particular skill set, or personality type, to be really good at it IMO. I've had some dates on there, but I think the men who are most successful at it seem to be a lot less reserved or introverted than me. They're the types that don't give a crap about anything and will say anything to impress a woman. I'm more of a "I'd like to get to know you, put my feelers out, let a relationship naturally develop". Someone like me just doesn't keep up with the pace of OLD. I did almost have something good with this one girl, but I decided to pursue another girl which ended up not working out in the end anyway.
This is my experience too (dealing with those kind of men) and I am not the type who likes that strong, overwhelming personality. I think the more laid back, get to know you over time types like us are on OLD (we were both there) but I don't think our type sticks around for long... but for different reasons. The men, like you, get discouraged by the aggressive men who "strike while the iron is hot" and the women, like me, get annoyed and overwhelmed by it, feeling like it's all just moving too fast.
OLD works, but not for all personality types. The only way you can figure out if it works for you is to try it (so while I hated it, I always tell people they should at least try).
Make sure you profile looks half way decent, there are plenty of websites out there with advice on how to do this. Or you could post here for suggestions. Keep the first message short but personalized. I usually won't agree to meet on the first message but assuming there are no red flags (and they can pop up) I'll agree to meet after 3-4 messages.
I know plenty of men, who yes are average looking some even a little overweight, who've met the SO through OLD. It's not successful for everyone but I find both genders do things that make their chances of success much less likely. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T704le1D1ag
One frequent poster on this board who loves to whine about how terrible OLD is what kind enough to post their profile and I could see exactly why they were having no success. People provided this person with lots of suggestions to improve their profile as well as the messages he was sending. He hasn't taken the advice on improving the profile and pictures at all, he most likely hasn't take the advice on the type of messages he is sending. Yet he is still whining
Last edited by ncsualum2004; 10-25-2014 at 10:17 AM..
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Gonna message a girl who viewed my profile..she's a teacher in an area my friend lives and teaches should I ask her what school she teaches in or is that too personal for a first message?
I never did old before just joined plenty of fish..Should I just message women I'm attracted to and have something in common with and tell them why is like to go on a date with them?
Online dating in a nut shell.
Women with unreasonable standards trying to hook something out of their league, and lots and lots of creepy dudes.
What happens is guys prey on women below their league to get laid. The women ignore the men in their league that would actually date them only to get duped by a player.
The guys are unhappy because they're only worthy of a woman far bellow their standards or sometimes no women at all if they're not average looking or above, and the woman are unhappy because they get played over and over. In the end.............nobody wins
There are lots of exceptions to this, but this is most people's experience.
I would stay away from any of the free sites if you're going to try it.
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