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For my first marriage we never did rings, we had other things to spend the money on.
My current husband was pretty adamant about rings, so I picked out something I liked that was relatively inexpensive. It's funny, the men's titanium rings at the jewelry store were about $300, I found ones who look identical on Amazon for $40.
I didn't want wedding receptions, I don't want all that work, money or attention.
I worked at a company doing events, and I specialized in weddings..... most of the men wanted the reception as much as the women, some more so.
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My gf would be content with a $1000 ring and no wedding. However I like nice things and I don't want to spend the next 50 years staring at her finger thinking "boy, sure glad I skimped on that thing to buy <insert some garbage item that'll have no value later in life>"
I'll probably spend around $10k when I buy her ring which will be less than 3 months of savings. She would also be fine with no real wedding but I'd like a small destination wedding for very close family and friends. A way to have a vacation with everyone. Our families live 1000 miles apart and we live nowhere near either of them, so they'll have to travel regardless.
I don't think it really matters on all of it. I would be MUCH more turned off if a woman required a ring of certain value / size if I felt it was extensive. Same with weddings. If she wanted like a $10k ring and a $40k wedding or something then she must seriously be in the position to be contributing financially. I don't mind buying a $ ring because it's my choice and I want it for her
My gf would be content with a $1000 ring and no wedding. However I like nice things and I don't want to spend the next 50 years staring at her finger thinking "boy, sure glad I skimped on that thing to buy <insert some garbage item that'll have no value later in life>"
I'll probably spend around $10k when I buy her ring which will be less than 3 months of savings. She would also be fine with no real wedding but I'd like a small destination wedding for very close family and friends. A way to have a vacation with everyone. Our families live 1000 miles apart and we live nowhere near either of them, so they'll have to travel regardless.
I don't think it really matters on all of it. I would be MUCH more turned off if a woman required a ring of certain value / size if I felt it was extensive. Same with weddings. If she wanted like a $10k ring and a $40k wedding or something then she must seriously be in the position to be contributing financially. I don't mind buying a $ ring because it's my choice and I want it for her
LOL. My husband is the same. Six months ago he said he wanted to get me a bigger ring.... I declined.
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I didn't want wedding receptions, I don't want all that work, money or attention.
Our wedding reception was seriously the most fun party I've ever had or been at, and my husband concurs. It was an absolute blast, and was totally worth what (fairly minimal, given the average cost of such things for a guest list that size) we spent on it. No regrets. It really wasn't any work, though, as it was almost entirely all-inclusive.
Both of us are much more into experiences than stuff, so we were plenty happy to dedicate our spending to things like our kickass reception and an amazing trip, versus allocating those same funds to rings and attire. We're both on the same page, as far as that goes. We had rings (did not spend much on them, though they are traditional), and we had the attire (aforementioned free gown and my husband is military and wore his dress blues), we just didn't devote the bulk of our wedding account to those things.
I'm thankful that Mrs. Chow is sort of a hippie chick in that she seems to just like simple things, she doesn't care about sportin a big rock.... she seems to be happy with little things that she likes, and most of the time they aren't expensive.... LOL....
We could be out at a fair or some kind of outdoor event where vendors are out selling things and she will see a simple toe ring for example that she'll just love and she lights up like a 4 yr old on Christmas day and it might cost 20 bucks... or something along those lines... LOL......
I'm thankful that Mrs. Chow is sort of a hippie chick in that she seems to just like simple things, she doesn't care about sportin a big rock.... she seems to be happy with little things that she likes, and most of the time they aren't expensive.... LOL....
That's us. We have pretty simple and uncomplicated tastes, as material things go.
All my favorite gifts from my husband have been things he's made (he's a woodworker/craftsman, as a hobby).
Our wedding reception was seriously the most fun party I've ever had or been at, and my husband concurs. It was an absolute blast, and was totally worth what (fairly minimal, given the average cost of such things for a guest list that size) we spent on it. No regrets. It really wasn't any work, though, as it was almost entirely all-inclusive.
Both of us are much more into experiences than stuff, so we were plenty happy to dedicate our spending to things like our kickass reception and an amazing trip, versus allocating those same funds to rings and attire. We're both on the same page, as far as that goes. We had rings (did not spend much on them, though they are traditional), and we had the attire (aforementioned free gown and my husband is military and wore his dress blues), we just didn't devote the bulk of our wedding account to those things.
I'm glad you had a great time. Funny thing is, I worked for the event company at that time and they offered to use their site and all the stuff (chairs, tent, linens, tables, other rentals) for no charge, and I still declined. /lol
I like a party, but feel uncomfortable with bride thing, just a strange hiccup in my personality.
The reception would have been around 300 (not uncommon here, a lot are closer to 500). I guess as an introvert I can't handle being "on" and the center of attention for 5 hours or more.
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If I ever meet a marriage minded woman who doesn't want an engagement ring, I will let you know. Otherwise, I cannot imagine this is all that common.
Sounds fine to me if your on board too. Really, an engagement, marriage,decision to be in an LTR but not married, etc, and how to handle the particulars are all part of being partners in the relationship. If that means skip the ring, then fine. I gave my wife a ring. She picked it out. It was not nearly the cost of numbers thrown around here. She loves it. I am glad she does. All is good with me.
More common than you think, those of us who are more practical and not material possessio oriented want a simple band. Overall we do not need to be reminded with a big ring that we are married, after that it is more practical depending on employment to not wear a big ring. Some of us actually still scrub our own toilets and do our own dishes and don't want to ruin a very costly bauble.
I'm glad you had a great time. Funny thing is, I worked for the event company at that time and they offered to use their site and all the stuff (chairs, tent, linens, tables, other rentals) for no charge, and I still declined. /lol
I like a party, but feel uncomfortable with bride thing, just a strange hiccup in my personality.
The reception would have been around 300 (not uncommon here, a lot are closer to 500). I guess as an introvert I can't handle being "on" and the center of attention for 5 hours or more.
Ours was about 200, most of it family. As far as being the center of attention, the only time I really felt it was during the ceremony...during the reception, it was just people dancing, eating, taking pictures, partying, talking, drinking, etc. But I'm not ultra-introverted, either, so that probably has a bit to do with it.
I was only willing to work with a place that was all-inclusive, because I planned a 200-guest wedding and reception in about four months from 600 miles away while on military orders. I didn't have the time or inclination to be navigating a bunch of separate vendors! Simplicity was key.
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Six months ago he said he wanted to get me a bigger ring.... I declined.
