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I really thought I knew my wife. Now I'm not so sure.
We've been married almost two years. Life's been very very good. We get along great and we've talked about starting a family. No real complaints on my part and (hopefully!) none on her side. If anything I wish she'd be a bit more adventurous in the bedroom but I came to realize that she's pretty traditional and conservative so I haven't made any big issue out of it.
On the weekend we were at some friends' home for a party. There were a bunch of people there - some we knew, some we didn't and got introduced. At some point I was coming back from the washroom and headed for the kitchen. I heard my wife chatting with some guy. I think she was giggling or something so I paused. I heard their conversation. The guy was asking her if she'd told me about them being together in the past. She told him that he was drunk and that no she hadn't told me. I guess the guy was too close or something because my wife again told him that he was drunk and should go back to the group. I think he laughed and then made a completely rude comment. He asked her if I [reference to intercourse] She didn't answer the question but told him again that he was drunk and being a dick and she left.
I really didn't digest things right there on the spot. I joined the large group and tried to be friendly I guess. We left the party some time later and that was it. I didn't mention anything about overhearing the conversation and my wife didn't bring it up either.
I guess I've been stewing since then. I said before that my wife is conservative in the bedroom. Well it seems that she wasn't all that conservative with that guy. I've suggested on more than one occassion that I'd like to try [anal intercourse]with her and she has absolutely not been receptive and kept saying that she doesn't do things like that.
So here I am asking for advice. I think I'm angry. Actually I know I'm angry. I just don't know what to do next. I'm not sure if I should tell her I heard the conversation with [reference to ex BF] or parts of it or not bring it up at all.
Somebody said here once that when guys complain that they want adventurous and non-conservative sex, they almost always mean they want in the back door. You seem to be no exception. From the conversation you overheard, it sounds like she didn't enjoy it, which is a good reason why she doesn't want it with you. Try lots and lots and lots of oral on her and see how receptive she is then. Good luck with your adventure.
I think you are making assumptions about a conversation you did not hear completely and a drunk who was being beyond ignorant.
This is your jealous "she did that with him but won't with me" insecurities showing through.
Feel free to tell your wife all about what you heard and your jealousy and feel free to be prepared to sleep on the couch on in a completely different apartment soon.
Let us know how it goes.
Last edited by RedZin; 01-06-2015 at 05:28 PM..
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