30 and missed the boat? (females, young, advice, Latin)
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You must be fairly attractive if women are hitting on you in spite of your depression. You can certainly put yourself out there and try to date younger women. You may or may not be successful, but try not to let yourself fall back into depression.
You can't recapture your youth, but you can have fun and live your life to the fullest.
Don't be so hard on yourself or the ladies you actually succeed with. :-) you may find that flawed individual is very accepting of your own flaws.
I've been through hell and I'm just so tired of suffering and missing out sometimes. I had to watch as my peers had the times of their lives and I could only watch and suffer in silence. I'm dirt poor at the moment but also remarkably resourceful despite this..
Dude, you're 30! There's plenty of life in you. So go out there, even if you have to do it alone, and make it happen. And then get back to us in 2075 and tell us all about it.
My bf who is 50 still wants those younger girls in their early 20's. I think alot of men feel that way. My ex-husband, who is 10 years older than me, told me he only dated women who were alot younger than him because as he put it, "By the time a woman reaches 30 her face changes and she looks old." (I have known him since I was 16, he was 26...we got married when I was 25, so I certainly wasn't looking forward to turning 30 having heard that.) I've been with some real winners.
I wanted to have been over all that by now in my life. I know guys my age who had loads of young girls in their early 20s, they had their fill of messing around and are now settling down or already married with girls maybe a couple of years younger than themselves. They don't have these issues about young girls because they experienced what was normal at the time.
I agree women by 30 do look aged and I apply that to myself as well. I would have wanted to meet the right girl by now after having had enough peripheral experience by which I would 1) meet her 2) not be tempted later in life by not having had enough experience early 3) be quite happy to grow old together with that woman without ever needing to view young girls in a sexual light again.
I have met girls my age with clear agendas.. never remember that when I was younger.
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This is where you are wrong, women who are experienced tend to not be as cruel as young girls are....that's a maturity thing that people grow out of in their 20's.
Sadly I believe it's because once they get older and their market value wanes (I do hate this notion but many people are painfully too aware of it) at which point they are looking for a nice guy/provider to settle down with and no longer have the clout to chase after the bad guy/******* type. Given half the chance I believe most would revert to their previous behaviour as young girls.
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Are you sure you really want those young girls because of what you missed?
Yes and also because I find women in their early 20s just far more attractive than the girls my age. I know it's sad and I hate it wish women had more time, sometimes I hate myself for thinking like this but I cannot help noticing it.
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I think you need to meet an older female, who can take you under her wing, and teach you things. After a year of lessons, you will have the confidence that could help you pull more young girls.
I'm not sure this would help to be honest. In bed I can honestly tell you there is little I need to learn, seemed to come intuitively. It's the social aspect that's the issue and making up for the best decade of your life. I suppose I feel like I'm grieving the loss of my youth + being ill for coming up to a decade now. I get depressed just seeing young girls.
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You must be fairly attractive if women are hitting on you in spite of your depression.
I was, really no lie in my early 20s had lots of girls hitting on me, which is what made me suffer so much more given my psychological issues. If I was really ugly I'd have just accepted it and not been so upset.
I haven't aged so well to be honest and haven't had much attention for a couple of years now.
You want to sow your wild oats before settling down?
Or you want to turn back the clock and pretend that you are still 20 so you can date girls who are??
Both.. precisely both... although not to pretend that I am still 20.. being 23 would be nice...
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I don't understand what is stopping you.
Age.. Looking older... getting told I'm too old to be somewhere... experience... the confidence that comes with it... mental issues... grief when I just see young attractive girls... No career... Little to no money... Just got out of prison so to speak...
Both.. precisely both... although not to pretend that I am still 20.. being 23 would be nice...
Age.. Looking older... getting told I'm too old to be somewhere... experience... the confidence that comes with it... mental issues... grief when I just see young attractive girls... No career... Little to no money... Just got out of prison so to speak...
Need I go on?
You're British?
Move to the States. Nothing drops panties over here faster than a British accent. You'll be combing the 20-something girls out of your hair.
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I agree women by 30 do look aged and I apply that to myself as well. I would have wanted to meet the right girl by now after having had enough peripheral experience by which I would 1) meet her 2) not be tempted later in life by not having had enough experience early 3) be quite happy to grow old together with that woman without ever needing to view young girls in a sexual light again.
I have met girls my age with clear agendas.. never remember that when I was younger.
Sadly I believe it's because once they get older and their market value wanes (I do hate this notion but many people are painfully too aware of it) at which point they are looking for a nice guy/provider to settle down with and no longer have the clout to chase after the bad guy/******* type. Given half the chance I believe most would revert to their previous behaviour as young girls.
It's a minority of women who do this. Most women are looking for a good guy in their 20's. Their taste in men doesn't change.
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Originally Posted by SwordinStone;
Yes and also because I find women in their early 20s just far more attractive than the girls my age. I know it's sad and I hate it wish women had more time, sometimes I hate myself for thinking like this but I cannot help noticing it.
You're hanging out with the wrong 30-year-old women, then, OP, and your idealizing women in their 20's. You're only looking at certain ones, and imagining that they represent all women in their early 20's. You don't know women as well as you think you do. This is your depression talking, not reality. Get treatment (non-medical) for your depression, and life will suddenly look completely different to you.
It's a minority of women who do this. Most women are looking for a good guy in their 20's. Their taste in men doesn't change.
You're hanging out with the wrong 30-year-old women, then, OP, and your idealizing women in their 20's. You're only looking at certain ones, and imagining that they represent all women in their early 20's. You don't know women as well as you think you do. This is your depression talking, not reality. Get treatment (non-medical) for your depression, and life will suddenly look completely different to you.
I've met several girls in their 30s from varying backgrounds and all had agendas or problems, like I was their catch for their post - bad boy fall out decade, a deal breaker for many was when I revealed my career was none existent and fair enough to them.
It is besides the point because girls in their early 20s are just far more attractive to me physically and they seem young fresh and not messed up, and mentally I see no difference between a 22 year old and a 28 year old, and I wanted to be over all of this and got it out of my system by now. Out of control feminism has done it's damage to women for sure as I have witnessed with many older than 30s girls (not to say patriarchy was much better).
Now I'm too late and I'm questioning whether I really want to or even can hook up with the opposite sex, as it seems like the only option presented to me now is to settle with the first older girl I am presented with, which would be a catastrophe both for her and myself seeing as I really should have sown my oats, got experience etc. "The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it..." Oscar Wilde, and I agree, otherwise I skirt with disaster in the future with unfulfilled desires and I cannot fulfill them now because I am out of age range, I don't remember anyone in their early 20s hooking up with 30 year olds, I was there I remember.
The grief I feel is just terrible, I'm trying and really want to close the book and just accept the boat sailed, depression won, so difficult. I know it can be depression talking but sometimes logically I really just don't want to be alive anymore, because once I close all the books I missed there is nothing left to live for, I kept believing I'd get better soon but even after trying everything I just couldn't seem to get out of it, now the disaster is complete.
oh geez if you're so desperate to bone a "hot" "fresh" "not messed up" girl then do one of two things
a. hire an escort
b. make a lot of money so you have some sort of selling point
right now at least on this forum you're sounding whiny and not sexy, not to the "damaged" "spoilt" "feminist" thirty year olds (ageism at its finest) and not to the "hot" "fresh" "not messed up" twenty year olds. MAN UP, you should feel LUCKY to be presented with any woman at all at this rate.
I've met several girls in their 30s from varying backgrounds and all had agendas or problems, like I was their catch for their post - bad boy fall out decade, a deal breaker for many was when I revealed my career was none existent and fair enough to them.
It is besides the point because girls in their early 20s are just far more attractive to me physically and they seem young fresh and not messed up, and mentally I see no difference between a 22 year old and a 28 year old, and I wanted to be over all of this and got it out of my system by now. Out of control feminism has done it's damage to women for sure as I have witnessed with many older than 30s girls (not to say patriarchy was much better).
Now I'm too late and I'm questioning whether I really want to or even can hook up with the opposite sex, as it seems like the only option presented to me now is to settle with the first older girl I am presented with, which would be a catastrophe both for her and myself seeing as I really should have sown my oats, got experience etc. "The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it..." Oscar Wilde, and I agree, otherwise I skirt with disaster in the future with unfulfilled desires and I cannot fulfill them now because I am out of age range, I don't remember anyone in their early 20s hooking up with 30 year olds, I was there I remember.
The grief I feel is just terrible, I'm trying and really want to close the book and just accept the boat sailed, depression won, so difficult. I know it can be depression talking but sometimes logically I really just don't want to be alive anymore, because once I close all the books I missed there is nothing left to live for, I kept believing I'd get better soon but even after trying everything I just couldn't seem to get out of it, now the disaster is complete.
Dude, how do you even know how old the women you approach are? Some of those women you think are barely 21 are probably 30+. True story, I hit up a woman who I thought was around 25, and she was mid-40's. You never know these days. For all you know, a couple of the hotties you've lusted after are older than you.
Get over yourself, man. Get some professional help. You're obsessing. And you're depressed. Good luck to you. Don't throw your life away.
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