Why does the United States have such a high divorce rate? (wives, Asian)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
okay this what I think. From expierence with other country and women I know that these ladies in united states do not treat men good. These women are very selfish people and do nothing good for there man. It other country the women do many things like cooking cleaning and doing all other chores. I see many women in this country do none of these thing and think they should be pamperd by men. These women get upset and divorce because they are bad people.
Agreed, also divorce laws favor women, why do you think they initiate 70% of the divorces for?
While I understand that your experience was bad, I am assuming you made the decision to get a divorce BEFORE seeking the advise of an attorney, so how is the divorce rate due to lawyers and law suits?
Lawyers actually make a living on hardship. They dont want you to reconsile. Less money made in that.
Empty the accounts?
Dont give her a dime?
Let her parents give her money?
These are not things that are condusive to keeping things civil.
Don't talk to him, unless you do it through me? Of course not. How can I bill you a minimum of a quarter hour ?
Scum bags.
Law suits: Sue anyone for anything bound to get lucky sooner or later. Why so many ads? Ambulance chasers. Scum bags.
I was making a joke anyway about lawyers being the cause of divorce.
But lets look at how they have helped the medical profession, the insurance industry, the ladder industry. LOL McDonalds. Lets face it they make corporate america look down right charitable.
Ugh...they don't "make people adversarial to each other". They advise their clients to use the law in what is in their client's best legal interest at the time.
If you wanted someone to "understand" both sides, then maybe you should have seen a counselor?
It is the job, and the ethical obligation of a lawyer, to represent their client in the best way they can. And, that means looking at the law, and advising their client about what is in their best interests, LEGALLY speaking. It's not up to the lawyer to say, "hey, you COULD do this, but, really, do you still love him?" At the end of the day, if someone comes to an attorney for a divorce, that's what the attorney looks at. That's what they HAVE to look at, and advise their client about.
If you don't like the law itself, I suggest you rail against your elected officials who actually make the laws, not against the lawyers that follow them.
Hmmm You miss the point. Lawyers advise you to put the screws to each other... They then reap the reward of a full blown feud. ie Billing hours. Its what floats their boats. I didn't want a counselor, nor did I want a snake in my pocket. They can say they are looking out for you all they want. The fact is they are making serious cash while stirring the pot.
Legally speaking when they represent the child molester to the best of their ability. They interrogate the victim on the stand, trying to confuse them as best they can. All so that the client that they represent who they also know is without doubt guilty can get the lightest sentence possible. They torture the child all for what again? Money... Defend them all you want. They do what they do because they have a serious lack of soul.
Lawyers actually make a living on hardship. They dont want you to reconsile. Less money made in that.
Empty the accounts?
Dont give her a dime?
Let her parents give her money?
These are not things that are condusive to keeping things civil.
Don't talk to him, unless you do it through me? Of course not. How can I bill you a minimum of a quarter hour ?
Scum bags.
Law suits: Sue anyone for anything bound to get lucky sooner or later. Why so many ads? Ambulance chasers. Scum bags.
I was making a joke anyway about lawyers being the cause of divorce.
But lets look at how they have helped the medical profession, the insurance industry, the ladder industry. LOL McDonalds. Lets face it they make corporate america look down right charitable.
It is obvious you had a bad experience and that is unfortunate but making a generalization about all lawyers based on that experience simply isn't fair.
Lawyers are not responsible for divorce in the U.S., they are simply providing a service to those seeking a divorce. If you didn't agree with the suggestions of the lawyer YOU chose, then you certainly were free to choose another. I find it difficult to believe that ALL of them are as you describe.
If I told you that I actually AM a lawyer who is looking for another, less "icky" profession, would that change your response?
Lawyers advise according to what the LAW is. It's not up to them to impose their own morality on a situation.
Not too long ago, I had a friend whose parents were getting a divorce. The "best" advice to be given by an attorney was something that ended up in a "War of the Roses" scenario. Why? Because NY law, at that point, pretty much said that any outward manifestation of "giving up the house" would result in the other spouse getting it. What else is the lawyer who's actually doing his or her job *supposed* to do but advise their client of this legality, and tell them what their best course of action would be?
To blame the lawyer for what happens is to just look for a scape goat. Unless lawyers are elected officials, and are acting in that capacity, they do NOT make the laws.
And, honestly, the fact that you're comparing your experience with a lawyer defending a child molester is LAUGHABLE. Not only because it's hyperbole, but also because, at the same time you're saying that people who defend these sorts of people "have no soul", you're also saying that one of the fundamental rights given to us in this country, that everyone is innocent before proven guilty, simply doesn't matter in certain cases.
Cry all you want. But, PLEASE, at least take some responsibility for your actions. If you don't like the laws, work to change them. Here's a secret: It starts by actually looking at the people who have control over the making of the laws to begin with.
"American women are very very very self centered, snobbish and a bit shallow." Is that that you're calling female independence now a days?
I totally agree, women are full of themselves....if you agree with them, be them right or wrong...they're happy as you shake your head like a puppet up and down. But, you give them constructive critisim, and they fear self awareness and what bad things they are doing to affect the lives of others. seems today, people fear being told they're wrong, they reject it....which stagnates them, everyone around them and society. Freedom and success is when an individual can self examine and embrace they're bad behavior....as well as they're good, it also means they are willing to accept who they are, and now, who they can be through self awareness. If you don't believe me, go back and live with your parents for a few years, and you will see, both the good and the bad of who you are. It is indeed an education.
Women are strong survivors, they are able to endure mental and physical pain beyond what would drive men up a wall...but, they have not evolved, they have not empowered themselves with the ability to allow others into their small little worlds. That is right...no matter how high up on the scale of a career you are....it is our small little worlds, the ones WE create for ourselves....and tell ourselves we are happy when we are really not. Women can be selfish, thick headed bullies, that care more about results then the feelings of others.
If, a human being has a consciense, and they do something wrong...the guilt of that wrong can be very staggnating, for years...but we build up these walls around ourselves unable to self examine, actually believing that we are doing what is right...and in fact, we are not!
I shake my head when I think about how, I wish, I had had a parent that knew all these things....then....which would have conditioned me along the path a lot further at an earlier age....which would have probably saved me a lot of mistakes. But...when I self examine....sure those mistakes were hard, painful, tragic and effected so many others...but, I'm stronger for those hardships....better for them...even when people treat me cruel and unfairly...today, we teach our kids to fear making a mistake, to fear going out there and experiencing the marvelous life that was given to us. In my case, my mother feared travel....feared making a mistake so much that she evaluated making a decission for years...actually feared spending money, and living life, seeing things that her eyes had never seen before....feared making anyone angry. Her world was so small...she never really worked, developed social skills, and actually feared going to a party or gathering, to socialize with others....she feared herself, said she was peculair....and she was in a lot of ways, but she was a strong woman...kind, giving, heartwarming and generous...she gave to others before she took for herself....and I've never heard her say an unkind word...but she actually feared liking herself and when you gave her a compliment, she would reject that.
When society learns how to become self aware, learns and accepts the flaws within the self, then and only then, will society change. But women....oh my, they are "strong like bulls!" and can endure almost anything....and why are they stronger then men....because women/mother's cling to their sons so much/make them dependent upon them...spoil them rotten and create a monster for the woman who comes along to marry them. A mother's job, is to help their children under stand responsiblity....to teach them to be self sufficent....but most mother's believe, their whole entire purpose in life, is their sons...to weight on them had and foot and pamper them to the point, they make them weak and reliant on someone else to do for them.
Well, I"ve not read all the replies to this thread yet, because I have been very busy. But, I think people like myself don't help matters that much. I am being completely serious when I say that. I tend to try to analyze things too much, and maybe some other people do the same thing. I plan to marry later this year, and already I have begun to formulate plans for what would be best for me, IF things don't work out. Things like some secret money stashed away, that only I will know about. But, when we have already been thru marriages that didn't work, it's very hard NOT to think like this. I have even went so far as to check the waiting periods for divorce in two different states so far. Don't get me wrong, I do truly love this woman, and hope to spend the rest of my life with her. But then, I read about stuff like 50% or more marriages failing, and I see so many of my friends who were unable to make their marriages work. I guess theres really nothing wrong with both the man, and the woman having a back-up plan, but I do question whether or not this type of thinking is healthy or not. Maybe it doesn't really contribute to the divorce rate, but it somehow seems to me, that it might. I plan to read all of this thread when I can have more time. Although, the thread isn't about ME, but divorce in general, I would appreciate any thoughts on my post, and the concerns I've outlined. Thanks to all!
Well, I"ve not read all the replies to this thread yet, because I have been very busy. But, I think people like myself don't help matters that much. I am being completely serious when I say that. I tend to try to analyze things too much, and maybe some other people do the same thing. I plan to marry later this year, and already I have begun to formulate plans for what would be best for me, IF things don't work out. Things like some secret money stashed away, that only I will know about. But, when we have already been thru marriages that didn't work, it's very hard NOT to think like this. I have even went so far as to check the waiting periods for divorce in two different states so far. Don't get me wrong, I do truly love this woman, and hope to spend the rest of my life with her. But then, I read about stuff like 50% or more marriages failing, and I see so many of my friends who were unable to make their marriages work. I guess theres really nothing wrong with both the man, and the woman having a back-up plan, but I do question whether or not this type of thinking is healthy or not. Maybe it doesn't really contribute to the divorce rate, but it somehow seems to me, that it might. I plan to read all of this thread when I can have more time. Although, the thread isn't about ME, but divorce in general, I would appreciate any thoughts on my post, and the concerns I've outlined. Thanks to all!
Dennis, if you feel this way....I would certainly rethink setting a date and explore the situation more....because from experience, I've learned, it doesn't get any better. I saw flags but ignored them....and I would firmly suggest you not fear writing down your reservations, perhaps going to counseling...talking them through, especially with her...if a person wants to make it work, they will work with you...not against you....maybe it is just fear from prior relationships...but....maybe those fears are warrented by her actions....only you know the answers to that....and only YOU can make the difference....
Good luck and many thanks always for such insight that you share.
If I told you that I actually AM a lawyer who is looking for another, less "icky" profession, would that change your response?
Lawyers advise according to what the LAW is. It's not up to them to impose their own morality on a situation.
Not too long ago, I had a friend whose parents were getting a divorce. The "best" advice to be given by an attorney was something that ended up in a "War of the Roses" scenario. Why? Because NY law, at that point, pretty much said that any outward manifestation of "giving up the house" would result in the other spouse getting it. What else is the lawyer who's actually doing his or her job *supposed* to do but advise their client of this legality, and tell them what their best course of action would be?
To blame the lawyer for what happens is to just look for a scape goat. Unless lawyers are elected officials, and are acting in that capacity, they do NOT make the laws.
And, honestly, the fact that you're comparing your experience with a lawyer defending a child molester is LAUGHABLE. Not only because it's hyperbole, but also because, at the same time you're saying that people who defend these sorts of people "have no soul", you're also saying that one of the fundamental rights given to us in this country, that everyone is innocent before proven guilty, simply doesn't matter in certain cases.
Cry all you want. But, PLEASE, at least take some responsibility for your actions. If you don't like the laws, work to change them. Here's a secret: It starts by actually looking at the people who have control over the making of the laws to begin with.
Look Mr legal aid I told you I was making a joke about lawyers causing divorce. Never said I didn't want a divorce. I am saying that Lawyers do in fact make the process a hardship. They see to it that both parties if not angry all ready will be shortly. If the parties talk to each other instead of through their hired guns the guns make less money.
I wasn't comparing a divorce lawyer to a defence attorney who knowingly defends a child molestor. I was eluding to the fact that they will infact do anything for money. Most folks want nothing to do with criminals. They are just too icky.... Yet we have a lot of lawyers who like to deal with them. There is a lot of money to be made from criminals.
Anyway this thread is about why america has such a high divorce rate.
As I posted earlier. Biggest cause is we have made it easier to divorce than to work out the problems.
2nd reason we have lost our sense of duty and loyalty to family.
Oh, yeah, I just saw this thread and I've got to add my 2 cents.
First and foremost, we are a selfish people, getting more selfish by the day. Divorce takes a toll, and most of these people don't care about what it does to their offspring in many cases, especially those that are serial divorce(e)s. Some of these people belong on Jerry Springer.
Ok, throw stones at me because my point of view will be male-biased. Here goes:
Women might be more to blame in the US (about 2/3 to 3/4 of the time) because they nag. The nag is more apt to be the woman who relies on the economic earning power of the husband who has a list of "shoulds" and "I needs." The situation escalates, putting additional burdens on the husband. At a certain point, he says I've had enough and walks. This is less likely to occur where the woman works and it's more of a marriage of economic equals, but that can also be a "pass you in the kitchen" kind of marriage. Now, mind you, some stay-at-home moms and housewifes respect their husbands and don't nag, but there are also some who have a problem with entitlement that gets out of control. The husband might then get abusive or start to cheat which sets off a cycle.
The other 1/4 to 1/3 of the time it's the husband. Generally, he has a roving eye because he was conditioned from his youth that he could get what he wanted (looks or smooth talker or whatever) and he keeps on "cashing in." It would be somewhat of an "addiction." Another more routine addiction is alcohol or gambling or drugs on the husband's side, so on comes the divorce.
Seriously, though, I was driving and listening to talk radio and a psych. said "The marriage ain't happy unless Mama's happy." If she's a demanding nag and isn't getting what she wants, it's over. And, look at the list of countries in the first post, it's all the ultra-developed white-stock Northern countries that have the highest divorce rates. In those countries, it's more likely that men have a higher capacity to earn and women want more out of life...they might feel entitled. In the poorer countries, there is still a lot of cultural conditioning that a woman is to be in her husband's shadow.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
