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I'm trying to help my brother but he seems to have a one track mind. He recently told me that he and his second wife are having marital issues. He says they don't communicate anymore because they amount of sex they had when they were dating has greatly dropped. He's 46 years old and they've been married about 5 years. He said that they are to the point of divorce because she only wants to have sex about once every other month or so. He said that when they were dating they use to do it 3 or 4 times a week. I told him that as you get older life does tend to get in the way and your sexual desire does change. He thinks they should still be doing it constantly. I told him that if he is basing his marriage solely on the amount of sex they have he has a slanted view of what a marriage is. He did say they were going to counseling but the counselor only wants to tell them how to better communicate but they never tell you or the other person what they are doing wrong. That's not the counselor's job. The couple has to figure that out. He said that communication is good but if a couple is not having regular marital relations then communication suffers. In my mind he's fixated too much on the physical than actually engaging in open conversation. He said she doesn't cook, clean, or even know how to make a bed but I told him she had to have been this way before they got married so he shouldn't be surprised by that.
He just sent me another text to say that she said she'd be willing to have sex once a week but only in the mornings and he goes on to say that with how early they have to get up in the mornings that only leaves Sat mornings. I told him that she's trying to compromise but he's not willing to meet her half way.
He seems to think that when ever the house is empty and the kids are gone they should be getting freaky all the time. I told him that if he's that horny all the time to just go in the bathroom and handle things for himself. But the more he pressures her for sex the less likely she's going to want to do it. He's thinking with the wrong head. How do I help him?
For your information he is my brother and he asked me. If your brother or sister came to you with a problem are you going to say, "That's none of my business!" I'm trying to give him the benefit of my advice but he only wants to be naked and humping her all the time. Anyone would get tired of that after a while. No I don't blame his wife but she is trying to compromise a little.
Ladies, you walk into the house after a long day at work. Drove home in rush hour traffic. Have to come in and try to prepare a meal and all you husband thinks is, "hey, the kids are outside, let's go to the bedroom real quick." He does this 3 or 4 times a week. What would you do?
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pwebster
For your information he is my brother and he asked me. If your brother or sister came to you with a problem are you going to say, "That's none of my business!" I'm trying to give him the benefit of my advice but he only wants to be naked and humping her all the time. Anyone would get tired of that after a while. No I don't blame his wife but she is trying to compromise a little.
I would say this is something for you to work out with your partner.
Ladies, you walk into the house after a long day at work. Drove home in rush hour traffic. Have to come in and try to prepare a meal and all you husband thinks is, "hey, the kids are outside, let's go to the bedroom real quick." He does this 3 or 4 times a week. What would you do?
What would I do? Put dinner on summer, hammer one out, and then let him do the dishes
I would say this is something for you to work out with your partner.
Yes, I would do that 100% of the time.
He's not giving me intimate details about their sex life but he is saying they aren't doing it as much.
I guess my side question is this. Who is still having the same amount of sex now, after you got married, than you did before you got married? I mean, if you were getting it in 3 or 4 times a week while dating and several years into your marriage you're still getting it in 3 or 4 times a week I want to hear from you. 3 or 4 times a week would get old and stale, boring, and mundane after a while.
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