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Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,748,461 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63
The point is that men only do what THEY want to do....and they have to believe it is THEIR idea. If a woman approaches it will likely not go too far...they might be flattered but their rationale is as above "I didn't notice her therefore she is not worth noticing."
On the other hand, if a woman can be more subtle and arrange a situation so that it appears it is the guy's idea (by appearing to be flirting, etc.) THEN there's more of a chance - because HE makes the obvious overture.
Stupid...but true more often than not. Sorry, folks - I'm a feminist and really wanted to believe otherwise for a long time but it is what it is.
I'm a progressive and liberal, but the gender rules in regards to who approaches who are still very much in effect.
The point is that men only do what THEY want to do....and they have to believe it is THEIR idea. If a woman approaches it will likely not go too far...they might be flattered but their rationale is as above "I didn't notice her therefore she is not worth noticing."
On the other hand, if a woman can be more subtle and arrange a situation so that it appears it is the guy's idea (by appearing to be flirting, etc.) THEN there's more of a chance - because HE makes the obvious overture.
Stupid...but true more often than not. Sorry, folks - I'm a feminist and really wanted to believe otherwise for a long time but it is what it is.
Not all guys.
I wouldn't shun a woman I was attracted to just because she approached me first. If anything, I'd be thanking the lord, haha.
Women will approach if interested or just because they want to talk to a nice guy. Some guys think that if a woman talks to them they are interested. This is not always the case. Be yourself. Don't be scary...
Women will approach if interested or just because they want to talk to a nice guy. Some guys think that if a woman talks to them they are interested. This is not always the case. Be yourself. Don't be scary...
Tom is right. If I am in a social situation, I look for people who are laughing and friendly, and I can usually ease into the conversation. But how would I know I wanted to date someone until I talk to them? Only after conversation would I make the decision of whether I want to go out with them.
So do I and most women I know. Not sure where the OP is getting his info unless it is from his own self. OP, are you afraid to approach women? Or are women generally not attracted enough to you to strike up a conversation?
He's getting it from his own self, so to speak. He has no idea how women express interest in a man, which is very different from how men approach. Nor, presumably, does he understand how to actually attract women. My interpretation, anyway.
From posts like OP, no wonder half the men out there complain they "can't get dates" and other such nonsense.
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Being friendly and chatty.
