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So I am a 24 year old female. My boyfriend is 34. (I know, a bit of an age differemce) We have been together for over a year and a half and things have been great with him. He asked me to move in with him a little over a month ago and I agreed. He always talks about how in the future we will move to Idaho (our dream place to live) and has even just recently added me as a beneficiary on his life insurance. He has done all of this, but still can't say I love you.I'm' so confused. I feel like everything is all happening so backwards! The thought constantly floods my mind wondering why he hasn't said it. I really do love him, but I definitely don't have the guts to say it first, nor do I want to. I feel like if he said it first it would be more meaningful to me. He even mention something about kids a couple weeks ago! If he wants all of this with me. Why can't he say it? Maybe he really isn't in love with me? Maybe it's because he's been married once before already? I just don't know :/
The dream world that most young people live in is one where they actually think that life is about equality. Have you ever considered that just because you love someone they will love you back? It is also possible that some people can not receive love nor are they capable of giving it.
Let me get this straight. You gave up your home and life to cohabitate with a man who doesn't love you? What on earth?
Are you using birth control?
Beat me to it...I can't imagine moving in with someone if I didn't know whether or not they loved me...at least she isn't looking for marriage out of this, that would be awful to marry someone and not know if they loved you. IMO.
Op: Is this a monogamous relationship, or are you waiting for him to say so?
A bit of a difference. I have no issue expressing how I feel to a person, but lots of people do.
This^^^. When I was in my early 20s, I had a live-in serious boyfriend who was a quiet type, and he never once said he loved me. After 4 years we grew apart and I left him. He was devastated, I mentioned how he never said he loved me and his response was "for some people it just comes hard."
So OP, this may be the case, but if you love this man I urge you to communicate with him on this. Remember, it goes both ways, if you love him you should say so. I am an open expressive person, and just could not be with someone who was not.
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