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I see her around the store even more now than I did when we were together.
You should say that ^^^ to her and see what her response is.
This is why ignoring doesn't work and only creates drama.
If her being around is a coincidence, you're wasting emotional energy "noticing" her. If she is messing with you by intentionally showing up, you could end it all by making sure she knows that you are NOT friends.
Ignoring is not an adult way to deal with problems.
I'm no longer running away, but ever since that first encounter, I literally see her everywhere during my shifts. The day after that run in, we passed each other on my way out, and then yesterday, I saw her twice. Literally as soon as I came in, before even 5 minutes had gone by, she was in my department collecting carts (even though that's not her job) and talking and laughing with all my supervisors, and then later on I was walking up to the break room and I heard chewing so I knew someone was there, and sure enough, out of all people it could have been, it was her. It's like after that first encounter, she shows up everywhere during my shifts. There are 6 other people in her department, and I never see any of them during my shifts, only her. I see her around the store even more now than I did when we were together.
So either of you haven't said anything to each other yet?
Again all this awkwardness would go or at least ease a bit if there is some civil chat I'm sure... And much easier for you to get some sort of closure.
You should say that ^^^ to her and see what her response is.
This is why ignoring doesn't work and only creates drama.
If her being around is a coincidence, you're wasting emotional energy "noticing" her. If she is messing with you by intentionally showing up, you could end it all by making sure she knows that you are NOT friends.
Ignoring is not an adult way to deal with problems.
When I first found out about her new boyfriend that she started dating a week after our breakup, our mutual friend told me that her best friend introduced them to each other. I personally believe that that is BS and that she was seeing him before we broke up. I know that the mutual friend wouldn't lie to me, because he chose to be friends with me instead of my ex, but I think that she lied to him about how they met. That's why I ignore her, because her deceit pisses me off. Her friend and I still chat every couple of weeks, and the friend never mentions her, so I know that she genuinely cares about me. Obviously that wouldn't be the case if she really did introduce my ex and the new guy.
When I first found out about her new boyfriend that she started dating a week after our breakup, our mutual friend told me that her best friend introduced them to each other. I personally believe that that is BS and that she was seeing him before we broke up. I know that the mutual friend wouldn't lie to me, because he chose to be friends with me instead of my ex, but I think that she lied to him about how they met. That's why I ignore her, because her deceit pisses me off.
I get that. I totally get it.
What you're dealing with right now is bitterness. The best quote that I found that helped me get over stuff like this faster is this one from Carrie Fisher:
"Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die."
You aren't really over what she did, but you aren't really dealing with it.
What you're dealing with right now is bitterness. The best quote that I found that helped me get over stuff like this faster is this one from Carrie Fisher:
"Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die."
You aren't really over what she did, but you aren't really dealing with it.
Thank you. You are always very helpful. Some people tell me "maybe her friend really did introduce them," but this friend reached out to me after the breakup to see how I was doing and has not mentioned my ex since that first conversation and has even given me advice on how to move on. We still text every couple of weeks and talk about everything besides my ex. So I know that this friend wouldn't do that to me. I think my ex is just a pathological liar, and seeing her, especially when she's in a super great mood, makes me want to punch my register.
Thank you. You are always very helpful. Some people tell me "maybe her friend really did introduce them," but this friend reached out to me after the breakup to see how I was doing and has not mentioned my ex since that first conversation and has even given me advice on how to move on. We still text every couple of weeks and talk about everything besides my ex. So I know that this friend wouldn't do that to me. I think my ex is just a pathological liar, and seeing her, especially when she's in a super great mood, makes me want to punch my register.
Your gut is probably right.
It doesn't make it easier to deal with on a daily basis, but I have found that the simplest explanation is usually right.
When you're at work, try to keep your focus on the job. Don't be tempted to talk about her or the situation with any co-workers, and don't let it distract you from your work.
The minute you think she is trying to play games with you, call her out on it immediately and shut it down. You don't have to be confrontational, but you don't have to fall for it either.
It doesn't make it easier to deal with on a daily basis, but I have found that the simplest explanation is usually right.
When you're at work, try to keep your focus on the job. Don't be tempted to talk about her or the situation with any co-workers, and don't let it distract you from your work.
The minute you think she is trying to play games with you, call her out on it immediately and shut it down. You don't have to be confrontational, but you don't have to fall for it either.
Thank you. And the worst part is that she is still with her boyfriend that she left me for, and by doing the math, I know that they just celebrated their 3 month anniversary, since 3 months is also how long ago our breakup was. But I hope it gets easier.
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