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So my boyfriend and I have been together for a year and just a few months ago he invited me to a rave with his friends and we both go to raves a lot, but then He unvited me saying it was a guys trip. This rave is a camping 4day rave in Texas (which where I am from ) but now live in California.
Honestly I totally have been fine with it, in the past, I have let him go to events with his friends before but 2 months ago I found out he was talking to his ex saying sorry for how he ended it but also talking to her about what he plans to do in the future. I found out and was gonna break it off with him but he begged me that it was just closure for both of them because he never told her why they stoped and I am not just saying this but anyone who knows me know I am very understanding so I don't know why he didn't just tell me but I let it go because he's pretty great most the time!
On top of that just a week ago this girl sent him a selfie on snap chat and I opened it and sent her a picture of us kissing , let me tell you I was not mad at all but when I did that he was like why did you just send her that and I was like why not is there a problem with it ? And he didn't say anything but later I go on his phone and not only is her name not even on the list of people he's snap chatted anyone I don't really know closely of his friends were gone to, like wtf if you are not doing anything wrong there no need to delete who you've snap! When I told him he was like I didn't want you to make stuff up in your head so I just did that so you wouldn't fight with me on it ?! I told him that is bull sheet and you only do that if you are trying to hide some thing and from the very beggining I told him I'm not gonna be with someone that gets bothered if I look in there phone and now he has a problem with it ?!
I've told him many times if he wants to stop everything and go do all that stuff on his own let me know now . He always wants to stay together but as you can see my trust with him has gotten to a low and now he wants to go to this rave camping with out me with his single friends and one of his friends even has a girl that's pretty much his girlfriend but last rave he was dancing with this other girl ?! I told him why can't he just asked the guys if I can go ?? Like forreal his friends all love me and already say I'm like a dude but he won't even ask them and gets mad when I bring it up saying he doesn't wanna be that one guy that brings his girlfriend. Am I trippin please help I told my self
I'm not just gonna give up when things get hard like every couple does now days but I just feel like if he really loved me as much as I loved him he'd want to travel different place not with out me and not even be affaird or tell his friends she's coming with us maturely or am I trippin on that to? espically with everything that has gone on in the last 3 months how does he not consider me not feeling comfy with him doing this . And yes a lot of you are gonna say why are you with him if you don't trust him, but I'm not just gonna make trash of something I think is so good for the most part.
I need advice to make him see it my way because I have already told him all this and he still thinking I'm acting crazy . Lowkey I'm going crazy thinking about how he cannot see where I'm coming from and that is why I am on here so please help
Last edited by ladylegendary; 01-11-2017 at 11:50 PM..
So my boyfriend and I have been together for a year and just a few months ago he invited me to a rave with his friends and we both go to raves a lot, but then He unvited me saying it was a guys trip. This rave is a camping 4day rave in Texas (which where I am from ) but now live in California. Honestly I totally have been fine with it, in the past, I have let him for to events with his friends before but 2 months ago I found out he was talking to his ex saying sorry for how he ended it but also talking to her about what he plans to do in the future. I found out and was gonna break it off with him but he begged me that it was just closure for both of them because he never told her why they stoped and I am not just saying this but anyone who knows me know I am very understanding so I don't know why he didn't just tell me but I let it go because he's pretty great most the time! On top of that just a week ago this girl sent him a selfie on snap chat and I opened it and sent her a picture of us kissing , let me tell you I was not mad at all but when I did that he was like why did you just send her that and I was like why not is there a problem with it ? And he didn't say anything but later I go on his phone and not only is her name not even on the list of people he's snap chatted anyone I don't really know closely of his friends were gone to, like wtf if you are not doing anything wrong there no need to delete who you've snap! When I told him he was like I didn't want you to make stuff up in your head so I just did that so you wouldn't fight with me on it ?! I told him that is bull sheet and you only do that if you are trying to hide some thing and from the very beggining I told him I'm not gonna be with someone that gets bothered if I look in there phone and now he has a problem with it ?! I've told him many times if he wants to stop everything and go do all that stuff on his own let me know now . He always wants to stay together but as you can see my trust with him has gotten to a low and now he wants to go to this rave camping with out me with his single friends and one of his friends even has a girl that's pretty much his girlfriend but last rave he was dancing with this other girl ?! I told him why can't he just asked the guys if I can go ?? Like forreal his friends all love me and already say I'm like a dude but he won't even ask them and gets mad when I bring it up saying he doesn't wanna be that one guy that brings his girlfriend. Am I trippin please help I told my self I'm not just gonna give up when things get hard like every couple does now days but I just feel like if he really loved me as much as I loved him he'd want to travel different place not with out me and not even be affaird or tell his friends she's coming with us maturely or am I trippin on that to? espically with everything that has gone on in the last 3 months how does he not consider me not feeling comfy with him doing this . And yes a lot of you are gonna say why are you with him if you don't trust him, but I'm not just gonna make trash of something I think is so good for the most part . I need advice to make him see it my way because I have already told him all this and he still thinking I'm acting crazy . Lowkey I'm going crazy thinking about how he cannot see where I'm coming from and that is why I am on here so please help
One word for you, OP:
Paragraphs!
I feel discouraged reading this, just by looking at it..
Honestly I think he's a cheater. People here will attack you for being insecure but trust your gut. He's giving you many reasons not to trust him
Also calling someone 'crazy' is the card all deceptive people love to play
Thanks so much for your input But I don't wanna give up like everyone else does now days you know ? Am I stupid to let Us go on and learn to maybe trust him again or am I being naive ?
Thanks so much for your input But I don't wanna give up like everyone else does now days you know ? Am I stupid to let Us go on and learn to maybe trust him again or am I being naive ?
Letting go of something that makes you this anxious may be a good thing. Think of your true happiness. Why invest into someone you don't trust
OP, didn't he know when he first invited you to the rave/road trip that his friends were going? Or was it just going to be the two of you, but it somehow morphed into a guys' trip? And if his friends suddenly wanted to go, why didn't he say, "No, I'm going with my girl"?
If your both going to raves getting intoxicated, then you pretty much have a mutual agreement to go out on each other anyhow. Drugging yourself doesn't make for good decisions and you are an adult who knows this. Cannot expect exclusivity under those circumstances, obviously
Not sure what the issue is here. Except I suggest you stop going to raves and dating others who are involved in them. That's much more disconcerting
If your both going to raves getting intoxicated, then you pretty much have a mutual agreement to go out on each other anyhow. Drugging yourself doesn't make for good decisions and you are an adult who knows this. Cannot expect exclusivity under those circumstances, obviously
Not sure what the issue is here. Except I suggest you stop going to raves and dating others who are involved in them. That's much more disconcerting
WAAAAAY too sensible for this forum! lol
Welcome to the forum, Nancy.
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