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And you think his less than gentlemanly behaviour is somehow my fault?
Nope. Your fault is in exposing yourself to it... ignoring those red flags.
More pointedly... in not taking responsibility for exposing yourself to it...
and not extracting yourself from the situation immediately.
You stuck around for more.
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The good looking and well off tend to be advantaged in the dating market...
And the employment market too. So what are ya gonna do about it?
Welcome to Life 101
Quote:
I ignored the red flag because...
Ever read any Maya?
When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. - Maya Angelou
Quote:
Originally Posted by old_cold
isn't so often suggested to not get tied up in chit chat online and go for a face to face meeting ASAP?
That you can't really tell anything about a person until you do that?
Correct. But that doesn't mean to go out with every git who asks you to have a coffee...
Just to not limit yourself to the written or projected (when it appears to be good).
But ignoring what YOU consider to be red flags? No.
Last edited by MrRational; 01-27-2017 at 06:34 AM..
The good looking and well off tend to be advantaged in the dating market
How would a woman know whether a man is well-off or not? What if he actually was well-off, but tried to hide the fact by acting like someone of average wealth?
How would a woman know whether a man is well-off or not? What if he actually was well-off, but tried to hide the fact by acting like someone of average wealth?
You can't always tell. A person who shows off (which is an immediate turnoff anyway) the typical trappings of wealth could be in debt up to their eyeballs.
He's a jerk .... his fault. And you took the chance .... your fault.
OR there are good and bad people out there and you never know what you're going to get, so we all take chances, and then find out, and then move on. What's new in that?
How would a woman know whether a man is well-off or not? What if he actually was well-off, but tried to hide the fact by acting like someone of average wealth?
He came to meet me in a flashy sports car so clearly he's not someone averse to ostentatious displays of wealth. He probably expected me to be impressed and swayed by his car.
OR there are good and bad people out there and you never know what you're going to get,
so we all take chances, and then find out, and then move on. What's new in that?
Location: Sodo Sopa at The Villas above Kenny' s House.
2,492 posts, read 3,031,370 times
Reputation: 3911
I've ran into a few of these types since I started OLD. It makes some great stories. That guy sounds like a text book narcissist. That term sounds cliched but they are out there and dealing with them is as frustrating as all the info suggests.
I've asked the "why not just get a hooker?" Question before too. It's called ego. You were there to stroke his. It's all about him winning the game to get what he wants from you. He can't get that from a hooker. It's not really sex itself that he is looking for. It's sex with someone who puts him on a pedestal and thinks he's giving something special to them, but he isn't. He wants someone willing to play his game.
Location: Foothills of Maryland Blue Ridge mountains
993 posts, read 767,151 times
Reputation: 3163
Quote:
Originally Posted by sweetmimosa
And you think his less than gentlemanly behaviour is somehow my fault? Oh the irony of this coming from someone called 'Mr Rational'
Believe it or not, I was interested in him because he actually had other attractive attributes. Some of which were that we spoke the same languages and shared a similar educational background.
I didn't prioritise his looks or money.
If I was that type of woman, I would have gone straight to his house. As it were the meeting ended because I refused to go as a matter of principle.
The good looking and well off tend to be advantaged in the dating market so I didn't understand his game playing and like I said, he could have easily paid for a hooker.
I ignored the red flag because I gave him the benefit of the doubt thinking he may be a better communicator in person.
I know I'm opening myself up to ridicule but here it goes:
Being a millionaire is not a big deal these days particularly if you live in the metro area of a large financially stable city.
He could have assets worth 5 million and be in debt for 10 million. How do you know? How did he earn his wealth? Did he work for it or is he a trust fund baby boy who brags about his toys?
From the get go he told you he was a creep but you choose to ignore that. It is imperative that you start listening to your gut.
He didn't want a hooker because he gets off on the chase and conquest. He might have a string of willing NSA girlfriends but there's no challenge there. He was on the hunt for fresh meat, he wanted a fresh kill.
When I was a social worker I worked for the police department, often dealing with the victims of sexual assault.
I predict he will contact you again. Be careful.
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Since you have nothing constructive to say, kindly exit my thread.
