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My last girlfriend had bipolar disorder. Because of that, I did a lot of research on BP. One of the things I kept reading was how the other person would have to take on a caretaker role, which would put a great deal of stress on them. In most serious relationships, you expect to take care of each other. But if one person has a serious illness that will never go away, that could potentially make things lopsided. They're focused on managing their illness. But does that mean they're less capable of taking care of you when you need help? The books and articles I read would always ask "who takes care of you if you're too busy taking care of your partner?" They're basically saying you can't rely on your partner because they're too busy with their own health issues. Do you think there's any truth to this? I'm not just referring to a mental illness like BP, but illness in general. If one person is ill, does that automatically tilt the relationship towards them and their needs at the expense of the other person's?
I would see it no different than less say diabetes.
They would take medication to regulate their condition. Yes, there may be time where they could have an episode but for the most part people can live pretty normal lives.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Originally Posted by SVTLightning
I think it depends on the illness itself.
Exactly. Diabetes that person is handling? Not much of an issue. Bipolar disorder? I wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole. I had a roommate with BD, never again.
It certainly does depend on the illness. Some are easier to manage than others. Some it's just a matter of taking your meds. But certain illnesses require a great deal of your focus, making it harder for you to devote a lot of energy to your partner. Imagine if you're dealing with cancer and then your partner loses his job or injures himself and can't get out of bed.
This. I mean, bipolar disorder isn't exactly something you can control, but it has far reaching consequences in about every aspect of your relationship, especially in how you relate to one another. Meanwhile a chronic physical illness isn't quite the same thing.
The good thing is if you are tired of there crap and don't want the hassle of leaving, they'll leave eventually anyways! Win/win!
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