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So I have a 44 year old buddy that's been dating a 23 year old girl the last 6 months. This is by far the most attractive woman this guy has ever dated. He shows her off like a prize, but in all reality anyone that has actually met this girl knows her brain is broken. For starters, she is one of the dumbest human beings I have ever met. I think a lot of it comes from her background, as she was raised in a fundamentalist Mormon compound in Idaho. It's as if she lived under a rock until she escaped at 20 years old to go live with a family member here in AZ. Add to this that she's CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY. You can literally watch this girl melt down right in front of you the second my buddy isn't paying attention to her. This obviously makes it almost impossible to hang out with the guy without having him unexpectedly having to leave or have my wife chase his GF into the bathroom to calm her down a few times a night.
Well, my wife put her foot down and said "no more." She refuses to play counselor to some woman that's half her age while my buddy and I drink beer and watch sports, fish, play pool etc. It's been this way for a couple months now, so when we get together it's just guys. You would think this would solve the problem, but his crazy GF calls or texts him repeatedly until he has to go or ruins whatever we're doing. I finally put my foot down a few weeks ago and told him that if he wants to get together that he needs to turn the phone off. This was backed up by his brother who then went on a 10 minute rant about how annoying my buddies GF is. At one point the brother asked my buddy what him and this girl even talk about and my buddy said "nothing, but I love her." The brother replied with "no you don't. you love that stupid b**ch like I love my truck. It's not a real relationship." This resulted in the two of them arguing for the next 20 minutes and finally almost getting into a fist fight in the parking lot of the restaurant we were at. Talk about embarrassing
Neither the brother or myself have talked to this guy since that night. I think both of us as well as any other friends or family members this guy has are pretty much done dealing with the crazy GF. Anyways, the brother who I actually don't know all that well sent me a message on FB asking me if I wanted to get together with him and try to talk some sense into his brother one last time. I told him that I would think about it, but I really don't feel it's my place. I mean, if the guy wants to be with this monster, I say let him figure it out on his own, as their is no way this relationship will last. Or maybe it will, who knows? Either way, I don't really think it's my place to try and guide this guy to the light. He's a big boy and knows what he's doing. It just sucks that I've lost one of my best friend for the time being over some girl that I couldn't be around in a one on one situation for more than 10 minutes. I get it, she looks like a barbie doll, but it's not like this guy has ever had problems getting women. Maybe this is a mid life crises thing?
What would you do? Try and talk to the guy, or mind your own business.....
So I have a 44 year old buddy that's been dating a 23 year old girl the last 6 months. This is by far the most attractive woman this guy has ever dated. He shows her off like a prize, but in all reality anyone that has actually met this girl knows her brain is broken. For starters, she is one of the dumbest human beings I have ever met. I think a lot of it comes from her background, as she was raised in a fundamentalist Mormon compound in Idaho. It's as if she lived under a rock until she escaped at 20 years old to go live with a family member here in AZ. Add to this that she's CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY. You can literally watch this girl melt down right in front of you the second my buddy isn't paying attention to her. This obviously makes it almost impossible to hang out with the guy without having him unexpectedly having to leave or have my wife chase his GF into the bathroom to calm her down a few times a night.
Well, my wife put her foot down and said "no more." She refuses to play counselor to some woman that's half her age while my buddy and I drink beer and watch sports, fish, play pool etc. It's been this way for a couple months now, so when we get together it's just guys. You would think this would solve the problem, but his crazy GF calls or texts him repeatedly until he has to go or ruins whatever we're doing. I finally put my foot down a few weeks ago and told him that if he wants to get together that he needs to turn the phone off. This was backed up by his brother who then went on a 10 minute rant about how annoying my buddies GF is. At one point the brother asked my buddy what him and this girl even talk about and my buddy said "nothing, but I love her." The brother replied with "no you don't. you love that stupid b**ch like I love my truck. It's not a real relationship." This resulted in the two of them arguing for the next 20 minutes and finally almost getting into a fist fight in the parking lot of the restaurant we were at. Talk about embarrassing
Neither the brother or myself have talked to this guy since that night. I think both of us as well as any other friends or family members this guy has are pretty much done dealing the crazy GF. Anyways, the brother who I actually don't know all that well sent me a message on FB asking me if I wanted to get together with him and try to talk some sense into his brother one last time. I told him that I would think about it, but I really don't feel it's my place. I mean, if the guy wants to be with this monster, I say let him figure it out on his own, as their is no way this relationship will last. Or maybe it will, who knows? Either way, I don't really think it's my place to try and guide this guy to the light. He's a big boy and knows what he's doing. It just sucks that I've lost one of my best friend for the time being over some girl that I couldn't be around in a one on one situation for more than 10 minutes. I get it, she looks like a barbie doll, but it's not like this guy has ever had problems getting women. Maybe this is a mid life crises thing?
What would you do? Try and talk to the guy, or mind your own business.....
I would mind my own business. How can you talk him out of dating someone who he wants to date? It's his choice.
I would mind my own business. How can you talk him out of dating someone who he wants to date? It's his choice.
That's how I feel too. Maybe if he was some 20 year old kid in his first relationship I would try and talk some sense into him, but he's in his mid 40's. He knows what he's got himself into.
the brother who I actually don't know all that well sent me a message on FB asking me if I wanted to get together with him and try to talk some sense into his brother one last time.
I would say "No, and it's none of your business either. I just won't hang out with him until she's history."
I would say "No, and it's none of your business either. I just won't hang out with him until she's history."
You've already told the friend how you feel.
The brother has daughters that are roughly the same age as this girl, so I think he would have a problem with it even if the girl wasn't bonkers. I'm sure if it were my brother that I would probably have a little more to say about the situation too, but as a friend, I feel it's just not my place IMO.
In a way, this is almost like watching someone destroy their life with drugs accept that the drug is a young attractive woman. I couldn't even imagine being with a woman that was so loony tunes that literally every person I knew couldn't be around her. The only thing I can figure is that he values sleeping with this woman more than he values his own freedom. The whole thing is just odd to me because he's a smart guy that's got his $hit together. He could get a decent looking woman that's not nuts if he wanted to. She just probably wouldn't be in her early 20's and look like a waitress at Hooters. To each their own a guess.....
Sadly, I think the guy is going to have to learn this one the hard way. No amount of loving intervention by family or friends is going to rip off those rose-tinted glasses.
If it's any consolation, this does not sound like the sort of relationship that is built to last. A man's infatuation with a sexy woman only goes so far...after that, if you don't have good foundations of liking and being able to love and be content with each other, then you ain't got much.
The only modifiers to this would be if one or both of them are the "any relationship is better than being alone" type, or if he knocks her up. I hope they don't conceive a baby, that could really complicate things.
Sadly, I think the guy is going to have to learn this one the hard way. No amount of loving intervention by family or friends is going to rip off those rose-tinted glasses.
If it's any consolation, this does not sound like the sort of relationship that is built to last. A man's infatuation with a sexy woman only goes so far...after that, if you don't have good foundations of liking and being able to love and be content with each other, then you ain't got much.
The only modifiers to this would be if one or both of them are the "any relationship is better than being alone" type, or if he knocks her up. I hope they don't conceive a baby, that could really complicate things.
He's snipped, so he can't knock her up, and he already has kids with his ex-wife that he split up with about 5 years ago, so he doesn't want more. His kids live a few hours hours away, so he only gets them every other weekend. I have no idea how the interaction between his crazy GF and his kids is, but I know that he has her stay at her Aunts place when he gets the kids, which sorta hints that its probably not good. If she becomes a jealous wreck when he talks to friends, I can't imagine how jealous she gets with his grade school aged kids that require constant attention.
I think this girl will leave him eventually. She just seems like the baby machine type, and that's just not something that's going to happen in this relationship. I also could see her cheating on him. People that need constant attention (especially pretty girls) tend to easily find it elsewhere if they're not getting the amount that they need. One look at her facebook page tells the story. She has like 50 pictures of herself and not one of her BF. Being that she works in a restaurant, it's only a matter of time IMO. That's how they met in the first place.
So I have a 44 year old buddy that's been dating a 23 year old girl the last 6 months. This is by far the most attractive woman this guy has ever dated. He shows her off like a prize, but in all reality anyone that has actually met this girl knows her brain is broken. For starters, she is one of the dumbest human beings I have ever met. I think a lot of it comes from her background, as she was raised in a fundamentalist Mormon compound in Idaho. It's as if she lived under a rock until she escaped at 20 years old to go live with a family member here in AZ. Add to this that she's CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY. You can literally watch this girl melt down right in front of you the second my buddy isn't paying attention to her. This obviously makes it almost impossible to hang out with the guy without having him unexpectedly having to leave or have my wife chase his GF into the bathroom to calm her down a few times a night.
Well, my wife put her foot down and said "no more." She refuses to play counselor to some woman that's half her age while my buddy and I drink beer and watch sports, fish, play pool etc. It's been this way for a couple months now, so when we get together it's just guys. You would think this would solve the problem, but his crazy GF calls or texts him repeatedly until he has to go or ruins whatever we're doing. I finally put my foot down a few weeks ago and told him that if he wants to get together that he needs to turn the phone off. This was backed up by his brother who then went on a 10 minute rant about how annoying my buddies GF is. At one point the brother asked my buddy what him and this girl even talk about and my buddy said "nothing, but I love her." The brother replied with "no you don't. you love that stupid b**ch like I love my truck. It's not a real relationship." This resulted in the two of them arguing for the next 20 minutes and finally almost getting into a fist fight in the parking lot of the restaurant we were at. Talk about embarrassing
Neither the brother or myself have talked to this guy since that night. I think both of us as well as any other friends or family members this guy has are pretty much done dealing with the crazy GF. Anyways, the brother who I actually don't know all that well sent me a message on FB asking me if I wanted to get together with him and try to talk some sense into his brother one last time. I told him that I would think about it, but I really don't feel it's my place. I mean, if the guy wants to be with this monster, I say let him figure it out on his own, as their is no way this relationship will last. Or maybe it will, who knows? Either way, I don't really think it's my place to try and guide this guy to the light. He's a big boy and knows what he's doing. It just sucks that I've lost one of my best friend for the time being over some girl that I couldn't be around in a one on one situation for more than 10 minutes. I get it, she looks like a barbie doll, but it's not like this guy has ever had problems getting women. Maybe this is a mid life crises thing?
What would you do? Try and talk to the guy, or mind your own business.....
i never give up on friends. i would probably go help try to set him straight about this girl one last time, but i would be very cool about it. i would let him talk himself out of dating this girl rather than try to talk him out myself.
in the end however i would let him date this girl if he was truly set on it, and remind him that i am still his friend, and when he comes to his senses, we would go out for a beer or something and that i would buy the first round.
i would also remind him that if he ever found his testicles, and truly wanted to date this girl but still see his buddies, that when we did get together, ALL cell phones would be ignored unless there was a true emergency, or unless there was real business to be done.
He's snipped, so he can't knock her up, and he already has kids with his ex-wife that he split up with about 5 years ago, so he doesn't want more. His kids live a few hours hours away, so he only gets them every other weekend. I have no idea how the interaction between his crazy GF and his kids is, but I know that he has her stay at her Aunts place when he gets the kids, which sorta hints that its probably not good. If she becomes a jealous wreck when he talks to friends, I can't imagine how jealous she gets with his grade school aged kids that require constant attention.
I think this girl will leave him eventually. She just seems like the baby machine type, and that's just not something that's going to happen in this relationship. I also could see her cheating on him. People that need constant attention (especially pretty girls) tend to easily find it elsewhere if they're not getting the amount that they need. One look at her facebook page tells the story. She has like 50 pictures of herself and not one of her BF. Being that she works in a restaurant, it's only a matter of time IMO. That's how they met in the first place.
Glad to hear he has taken care of his reproduction capacity there. So, just wait. It'll run its course.
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