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Extra expense for no value added? There is value added though, whether you choose to take advantage of it or not. You can leverage your equity should you ever need or want to. If you really hate the increasing property value, you can sell it for a profit and buy a home in a less expensive neighborhood and pocket or reinvest your profits.
It gives you freedom and options. Much better than sitting on a property that is worth less than what you paid for it. That would suck.
Last edited by Butterflyfish; 10-21-2017 at 01:18 AM..
I would try the regular dating sites if all you're using is the apps like Tinder you're really limiting yourself. You might need better photos too I dunno, why not take some pictures at a park or something.
Last edited by wanderlust76; 10-21-2017 at 11:43 AM..
No, you don't get it. The forming of them isn't different. It's about making connection with people. Identifying with them, being social with them, sharing with them, being vulnerable, being supportive. One (of those people) might become a romantic connection, most won't, but to be successful in finding that one you need to want to and enjoy making connections with people.
The "I do not want people in my life or to deal with people, except for my romantic partner that I don't have yet" does not work. It never will work.
I don’t agree with you. There are lots of people who aren’t sociable and don’t care about connecting with people in general, but still manage to have a relationship with one person.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,948,491 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
I don’t agree with you. There are lots of people who aren’t sociable and don’t care about connecting with people in general, but still manage to have a relationship with one person.
That's a bit different. There are plenty of not social people that don't look connect with people, once the have relationships. But to find that relationship they needed to be social and make connections, and find some joy in it. It's pretty much impossible not to, as relationships are about trying to make connections with people.
The problem is it looks like a 23-year-old a year into their first real job lives there, not a real adult. It's a crash pad with some "guy stuff". It has a Hannibal Lecter vibe. Are you going to date her or eat her liver with a nice Chianti?
I post photos of my house all the time. I don't live in a mansion. I live in a very modest 992 square foot cottage on a small lot. I telecommuted from it for 7 years. I don't have 'mission control' in the living room. The bicycles aren't in the living room, either. I've spent a lot of hours on landscaping.
What a nice looking property! Well kept, inviting.
No, you don't get it. The forming of them isn't different. It's about making connection with people. Identifying with them, being social with them, sharing with them, being vulnerable, being supportive. One (of those people) might become a romantic connection, most won't, but to be successful in finding that one you need to want to and enjoy making connections with people.
The "I do not want people in my life or to deal with people, except for my romantic partner that I don't have yet" does not work. It never will work.
I just see it as the OP is an introvert that likes to go out on his terms but prefers a romantic partner that is also an introvert or doesn't have too many friends. The less people he has to deal with the better for him.
Not everyone is a social butterfly but the odds are a bit against the OP as being an introvert makes it harder to meet other introverts. I know some couples that always have to go out with others while I know some who prefer socializing to a minimum.
Extra expense for no value added? There is value added though, whether you choose to take advantage of it or not. You can leverage your equity should you ever need or want to. If you really hate the increasing property value, you can sell it for a profit and buy a home in a less expensive neighborhood and pocket or reinvest your profits.
It gives you freedom and options. Much better than sitting on a property that is worth less than what you paid for it. That would suck.
But am I really getting an extra value? any profit or perceived profit was actually spent on increase property taxes over the years. factor in adjustment for inflation it would still not be an increase that was worth paying more in taxes because some newer homes got built a block away, and the local highschool got an aviation program 2 years ago(those were the biggest increases in my taxes). Ft. Worth ISD Opens Airplane Hangar at Dunbar HS | News Talk WBAP-AM
This school is 2 streets from my house. and I don't even have school aged kids anymore.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
I don’t agree with you. There are lots of people who aren’t sociable and don’t care about connecting with people in general, but still manage to have a relationship with one person.
Yes there are, I was able to do this as well when I was younger, even when I met someone in a social situation as soon as one female in the crowd showed interest we would break off from the main crowd and get to know each other un-interrupted(not always sex either) most of the time just talking outside the club/party etc etc or we would leave all together and let the others socialize.
These days this does not play out anything like that, in those functions women don't want to break away from the crowd or they don't give the cues for those interrupting us to leave.
And as I have said before sadly most of the people I know who have the type of relationship I am seeking got together in their teens(those are usually the people I hang with when I am part of a couple) and 20's very few met at middle age.
Quote:
Originally Posted by moxiegal
Except- I am a woman. I hate shopping and I like sex.
Unfortunately, I am now getting divorced. These things didn't get me anywhere.
If this is true then your soon to be ex is a moron who has no idea what he has(if the sex was only with him that is).
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stockyman
I just see it as the OP is an introvert that likes to go out on his terms but prefers a romantic partner that is also an introvert or doesn't have too many friends. The less people he has to deal with the better for him.
Not everyone is a social butterfly but the odds are a bit against the OP as being an introvert makes it harder to meet other introverts. I know some couples that always have to go out with others while I know some who prefer socializing to a minimum.
And actually I'm an introvert with the personality of an extrovert, I do best one on one but I'm not a grump(when in relationship), and I do like doing things(when I am with a woman I care about), I just don't like my time with her being interrupted by other people. and even though I don't mind going out every once in awhile I don't prefer it because:
Having a few drinks together at home is preferable to at a bar because:,
1. no loud drunks around us.
2. no other people trying to flirt with one of us.
3. bars mark up the cost of drinks.
4. too noisy to communicate with each other.
5. no DUI's because we are already home.
Watching a movie together at home is better than at the theaters because:
1. We can snuggle up on the couch while watching.
2. I have kodi so movies are free.
3. no people getting up in front of us in the middle of the movie.
4. we can reenact the love scenes while fresh in our memory.
Eating in is better than eating out because:
1. I'm a damn good cook.
2. I know how to make healthy and tasty food.
3. It's much cheaper.
The difference is theyre coupled already. Different story.
That's my point also, but I doubt they were all social then became non social later(though I'm sure some did). as I mentioned in my response to that post most people I know personally who have the type of relationship I seek met very young(teens and early 20's) and have been that way since day one and just got lucky that they never grew apart and were similar enough in personality that they never developed dramatically different interests over the years. That does worry and depress me because it makes me simply think that at a certain age very very very few people can go all in on a relationship. And these people just met at an age where they were working with a blank slate that they filled together. one friend in particular you would think that they had only been dating a few weeks as lovey dovey as they are, he got injured a few years back and she looked in worse shape than him from simple worry(not sleeping or eating), sad they went through that but he is so lucky to have that kind of love(coma for a week several broken bones but only a slight limp now to show for it).
And yes I have very few friends most I've known since school and even fewer that live around here, being a military brat most of the people I would call friends are scattered to the four corners of the earth and most I only reconnected with in the last ten years via social media, that's part of life growing up on bases, you can make a friend today and a few months later he/she is getting stationed to god knows where or I was getting stations somewhere else.
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Well kept, inviting.
