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Dating & my career are two important priorities in my life.
I've seen that dating does involve time, emotions and finances. And my career is important, just trying to figure what my next moves will be (such as, returning to college or university for a different program, career change potentially).
I can date and focus on my career, but I find that one usually outweighs the other. When I'm dating, there is less time to spend on my career.
I'm close to making my mind up, to take 3 - 9 months away from dating, to focus my attention on my career.
I'm positing on her because...has anyone been in a similar situation and what did you decide? What would you do if you were in my situation?
Thanks.
Why are the two mutually exclusive?
That being said, if you find that you're just not enjoying the dating life, it's okay to take time off from it. Get your happiness from other sources, whether it's the job or hobbies or friends.
I had a string of dating disasters, so I finally just didn't bother for about six months. It was great to clear my head and rethink how I approached matters. Upon reflection, it dawned on me that I was essentially dating the same kind of woman over and over again. After that, I made a conscious attempt to avoid those in my life. Worked like a charm. Met my wife. We were married within ten months.
However, to your question, my soon-to-be wife and I were both professionals working in demanding career paths. We respected each other's professional requirements, whether it meant studying for a qualifications exam (Her) or my pulling all-nighters to make a deadline (Me). Make sure that the people you date get that, too.
Or you start work at 5 am and don't get off until 11 pm
Some careerfields make dating very hard.
I worked in male-only environments for most of my career. I spent 5 months a year on the surface, but during the rest of the year there are no females.
I worked in male-only environments for most of my career. I spent 5 months a year on the surface, but during the rest of the year there are no females.
As someone who did this grind for the past year while in school., let me tell you how this works.
A weekday:
Wake up at 7:30am shower and be out the house at 8:15 and drive to work.
Work at 9am until 7pm.
Commute home and on a good day (which don’t happen often in DC) get home at 7:30.
Gotta eat right? Be done with that at 8:15.
The reading and studying for grad school is insane and usually I tap out at 11pm from exhaustion with only enough energy left to get all the crap off my bed then ass out.
Saturday: either 8 hours of class after pulling an all nighter to get an assignment done or 5 hours of work. With either one I somehow make it home without passing out, then nap for 3 or 4 hours. After that, I have to keep the house clean somehow so that takes up the rest of my day Saturday.
Sunday: Either studying, cleaning, or resting (sleeping) since it is the only day I have to myself.
Would you want to have a partner that that hard schedule? From the sources of women here I’ve tried to set up dates with with very little free time the answer is no. They aren’t that patient from experience. Replace school with extra hours at work and it’s the same thing.
You should really not date if your schedule was as busy as mine was the last year. There is being able to do it nd being able to do it right. BIG difference.
Just an FYI, there's an increase in employers these days are starting to care less about a college education and more about someone who can just do the job. With the increase in tuition and college books, unless the company is willing to give you a full ride on education, it really isn't worth the return on investment since I know middle aged men are paying off their college debts from back in their early 20s.
When I was pursuing my nursing degree, that came first to me.
I did not want to be distracted so I didn't approach or talk to women unless it was absolutely necessary.
Cause of this I didn't get distracted, got good grades, and now I have a great career as a registered nurse.
I didn't take dating seriously again until December of last year. Best decision I ever made.
Women come and go, my career and degree will last a lifetime.
Really? I knew of people in nursing programs that were dating and getting married from people they met in college, it never distracted them. Their success never faltered.
Depending on the couple, balancing career and a relationship is doable. Before my lady and I became a couple (Jan. 2017), we were focused on our graduate education. It helped that we were friends all our lives first. After graduation, we made our relationship official.
How many days a week do you have exposure to non-coworkers though?
That depends on who you are. I’m just saying that a vast majority of people don’t meet their significan others at work. Even if you do work with females, they have to be single, your age, and interested. It would make it easier though if you worked in a huge office with a lot of younger single females.
Really? I knew of people in nursing programs that were dating and getting married from people they met in college, it never distracted them. Their success never faltered.
I know a few people from my program who got married but I didn't meet my gf until after I got out of the program last year.
I wanted to be completely focused on that and it paid off for me. People are different and do things differently.
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