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When I was young, a couple was not even really engaged-even if they set a date- unless the girl had a diamond ring. Now thank goodness it doesn't seem to be that important. But to those who do really want a ring, size seems to be very important.
When my now Dh and i announced we were engaged and went shopping for wedding rings, we had several clerks try to intimidate us into looking at engagement rings even when we said we only wanted to see wedding rings. i remember one clerk brought out a huge (2+ ct) diamond which was "reasonably priced" but had a flaw so big we could see it without the loop. i was insulted and we left.
We chose a beautiful ring with 3 rows of 3 diamonds in each row for my wedding ring and I have received so many compliments on it. it looks kind of like a wedding ring but not your typical wedding ring.
So do you want a ring to impress your friends and family with what a good catch you are marrying, because you really always dreamed of a diamond ring or a formal engagement ring or do you even care?
To me, not at all.
I don't wear jewellery, so it wouldn't be comfortable.
To my fiancee, not important either.
She does wear some jewellery, but only if we go out, or special occasions.
We have discussed other options, but haven't really come up with anything.
When we do get married, we'll exchange token rings as per the custom, but neither of us plan to wear them afterward.
If we can come up with a better suggestion for things to exchange than rings, we'll probably go with that instead.
We are mulling over a couple of ideas...............
When I was young, a couple was not even really engaged-even if they set a date- unless the girl had a diamond ring. Now thank goodness it doesn't seem to be that important.
I imagine that varied very much depending on social class and location. My parents got engaged/married in the late 70s and my dad could not afford an engagement ring. It was not a big deal. If anything, I feel it's gone the opposite way - in my parent's time, the engagement ring was an upper class tradition and wasn't a big deal to the middle or lower classes. Now it's practically expected by many across all social classes.
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But to those who do really want a ring, size seems to be very important.
When my now Dh and i announced we were engaged and went shopping for wedding rings, we had several clerks try to intimidate us into looking at engagement rings even when we said we only wanted to see wedding rings. i remember one clerk brought out a huge (2+ ct) diamond which was "reasonably priced" but had a flaw so big we could see it without the loop. i was insulted and we left.
You shouldn't judge society off of jewelry sales people. Of course they wanted to sell you a big diamond ring over a plain wedding band - they'll make more money! I think they often get commission too so sometimes they can be very pushy. That doesn't necessarily mean that the size of the diamond is very important to people who buy engagement rings.
When my husband and I got engaged, I told him I didn't want/need a ring. And I wasn't just saying it. I had been engaged before and broke it off. I'd already had the whole big, beautiful diamond thing - in the end, it meant nothing and I gave it back to him when I ended the relationship. With my husband, I had no great desire for those things... that's partly how I knew it was right this time - as though with the first one, I'd been trying to cover up the fact that he wasn't right for me with lots of flashy, exciting material things. With my husband, it wasn't necessary, all I wanted was him. But HE insisted! I couldn't very well turn it down. So yes, I have an engagement ring and I wear it with pride not because it's beautiful and expensive but because my husband bought it for me. But honestly, I don't even remember how many carats it is or what it's other quality ratings are.
Oh and my wedding band is just a smooth, plain band.
So do you want a ring to impress your friends and family with what a good catch you are marrying, because you really always dreamed of a diamond ring or a formal engagement ring or do you even care?
I want an engagement ring to impress myself, not other people. As I mentioned in another engagement ring thread, I wouldn't expect a guy to buy a ring that I couldn't afford myself, and since I'd be willing to put money towards it, there's no reason why I shouldn't get the type of ring I'd want.
Our original rings have been sitting in the jewelry box for almost one year now, we opted for 10k gold comfort fit bands that we both could wear daily without any issues. I never wore my rings unless we were going out and his is now oval shaped instead of round from his work. Neither of us have removed the comfort band rings since we put them on because we barely notice if at all that they are present.
I've had several guys in the past suggest we get married, or say that they wanted to marry me, but I wouldn't consider it official w/out a ring. I've learned not to take "suggestions" about marriage seriously nor as any sort of engagement proposal. It's all just talk to me w/out a ring.
I don't need anything fancy, but I am slightly old fashioned when it comes to marriage in that regard.
I love my engagement ring. I hardly ever wear jewelry but I never take it off. It's just beautiful. And it was so important to my husband. I told him I'd be fine with anything - but that it had to be no bigger than 1karat. I have small hands and I'm short - anything bigger than 1 karat would have looked kind of silly on me, in my opinion. He went to a friend of the family and bought the most beautiful 1 karat solitaire. He was really proud of himself! I like what it signifies - that we belong to each other. He lost his wedding ring about a year into our marriage - and we had to save up the money to buy him a new one so he wasn't wearing anything for awhile. I went and bought him a cheap silver band just so he could wear it until we replaced the one he lost. Then I had the new one engraved with #2!
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