Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I've read the first 5 pages here, and the best suggestion I've seen is volunteering, which comes up for me over and over. I can't figure out where I want to volunteer. I signed up to volunteer at a pet shelter, but they seem to only want people to show up at Petsmart and help with adoptions. I'd rather walk the dogs or do some other job at the shelter, or even foster a dog. So that leads me to the next thing. Are you a dog person? Do you have one? Thats another option where you could meet more people as you're walking your dog or at a dog park.
I'm 6 years older than you and have the same struggle. I don't live in a great city for dating, and have tried it all...meetups, joining a country club, going out to new places, joining a new gym, etc. I mean, its work these days. Online dating is mostly like trying to find a needle in a haystack with the swipe culture. Its not as easy as some make it sound on here. I have a great career and bought a new house recently. I hired a decorator to help me decorate so it didn't look overly masculine. I'm not sure about feng shui, but the concept is to make space for a partner in your house. I did that in my bedroom by having a lamp and table on both sides of my bed. Bathroom has double sinks. Decorations have some softer colors (not all black, blue, brown). Whether it helps me or not, we will see.
I think the crux of your question wasn't is it too late to marry as many have interpreted it, but is it too late to have a family. For me I think it is, but for you, I don't. Reason being, you can date down to mid-thirties and I don't think I can anymore.
P.S. I started a thread about praying for a wife, which people mostly said was a dumb (my interpretation) idea. I can see how it would be if it comes off as just asking for a thing as if God was a parent or a genie. I don't know...
I've read the first 5 pages here, and the best suggestion I've seen is volunteering, which comes up for me over and over. I can't figure out where I want to volunteer. I signed up to volunteer at a pet shelter, but they seem to only want people to show up at Petsmart and help with adoptions. I'd rather walk the dogs or do some other job at the shelter, or even foster a dog. So that leads me to the next thing. Are you a dog person? Do you have one? Thats another option where you could meet more people as you're walking your dog or at a dog park.
I'm 6 years older than you and have the same struggle. I don't live in a great city for dating, and have tried it all...meetups, joining a country club, going out to new places, joining a new gym, etc. I mean, its work these days. Online dating is mostly like trying to find a needle in a haystack with the swipe culture. Its not as easy as some make it sound on here. I have a great career and bought a new house recently. I hired a decorator to help me decorate so it didn't look overly masculine. I'm not sure about feng shui, but the concept is to make space for a partner in your house. I did that in my bedroom by having a lamp and table on both sides of my bed. Bathroom has double sinks. Decorations have some softer colors (not all black, blue, brown). Whether it helps me or not, we will see.
I think the crux of your question wasn't is it too late to marry as many have interpreted it, but is it too late to have a family. For me I think it is, but for you, I don't. Reason being, you can date down to mid-thirties and I don't think I can anymore.
P.S. I started a thread about praying for a wife, which people mostly said was a dumb (my interpretation) idea. I can see how it would be if it comes off as just asking for a thing as if God was a parent or a genie. I don't know...
Have you considered international dating? I think this is a good alternative if you can afford it, like to travel, have respect for other cultures and have no luck in America. I know feminists on this board hate international dating and consider all men involved in this activity abusers. Nevertheless, there are plenty of success stories as long as you understand that you are marrying a person, not a domestic slave...
Have you considered international dating? I think this is a good alternative if you can afford it, like to travel, have respect for other cultures and have no luck in America. I know feminists on this board hate international dating and consider all men involved in this activity abusers. Nevertheless, there are plenty of success stories as long as you understand that you are marrying a person, not a domestic slave...
It's not that he hasn't had luck in America, which is a pretty big and varied place, let's face it. He's been stuck in the Midwest due to his job, where most people marry young, and it's a difficult environment for people who are single after 30 or 35.
It's not that he hasn't had luck in America, which is a pretty big and varied place, let's face it. He's been stuck in the Midwest due to his job, where most people marry young, and it's a difficult environment for people who are single after 30 or 35.
Exactly. Yes, I have strongly considered it, BUT I just think I would always wonder if the woman was only with me for a Green Card or money or something else superficial. I really thought if I was still single at 50, I would try it, but well, I just can't bring myself to take that big of a risk. There are services that take these dumpy looking middle aged guys to places like Russia or Colombia. Compared with them, I'd have an advantage I guess, but I'm not unrealistic in thinking I can land a woman half my age.
Before I met my husband, he’d remodeled his house and completely removed the kitchen. He wasn’t planning to do any cooking and didn’t plan to marry, either.
THERE it is. The opinions you expressed were so oddly particular that I suspected there was some kind of projection going on.
OP's story reminded you of something that irked you about your husband when you first got to know him. Now it makes sense.
Exactly. Yes, I have strongly considered it, BUT I just think I would always wonder if the woman was only with me for a Green Card or money or something else superficial. I really thought if I was still single at 50, I would try it, but well, I just can't bring myself to take that big of a risk. There are services that take these dumpy looking middle aged guys to places like Russia or Colombia. Compared with them, I'd have an advantage I guess, but I'm not unrealistic in thinking I can land a woman half my age.
Well, if you want international dating, the Canadian border isn't that far away, and a Canuck would be a lot less likely to want you for your visa potential.
Have you tried that dating service, not sure if it's correct to call it a kind of match-making thing, that sets you up for lunch with people? It might be one way to meet single women in whatever you define your age-range as.
THERE it is. The opinions you expressed were so oddly particular that I suspected there was some kind of projection going on.
OP's story reminded you of something that irked you about your husband when you first got to know him. Now it makes sense.
Not judging; I've done it too. Just observing.
Not exactly, a friend and I had been discussing a real life single friend and talking about how he was set in his ways regarding his home. I used my husband as an example because it was so odd. It didn’t tick me off because I later designed a new kitchen in that space.
Exactly. Yes, I have strongly considered it, BUT I just think I would always wonder if the woman was only with me for a Green Card or money or something else superficial. I really thought if I was still single at 50, I would try it, but well, I just can't bring myself to take that big of a risk.
And you think American women are always going to be with you for non superficial reasons and will not care about your earning potential? US residency of course is not relevant.
I think the risk with International Dating is considerable but probably not much more than marrying in the US, where half of the marriages end in divorce, mainly initiated by a women. As long as a guy does not treat his spouse as a slave. I know of plenty of success stories...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlguy39
There are services that take these dumpy looking middle aged guys to places like Russia or Colombia. Compared with them, I'd have an advantage I guess, but I'm not unrealistic in thinking I can land a woman half my age.
International dating does not in any way require you to date & marry a woman half your age. In my opinion, this is a very bad idea...
And you think American women are always going to be with you for non superficial reasons and will not care about your earning potential? US residency of course is not relevant.
I think the risk with International Dating is considerable but probably not much more than marrying in the US, where half of the marriages end in divorce, mainly initiated by a women. As long as a guy does not treat his spouse as a slave. I know of plenty of success stories...
International dating does not in any way require you to date & marry a woman half your age. In my opinion, this is a very bad idea...
Agree. American women are very money focused, despite having their own. This isn't pre-1960 where they need to be this focused on how much a man makes, and yet many are. So I'm probably in the top 5% of earnings in this country, but it hasn't helped that much since I need to save most of it and am not flashy.
Agree with you, but that is how it is presented with these services. There's even documentaries on it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
