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Old 11-07-2008, 02:56 PM
 
Location: SUNNY AZ
4,589 posts, read 13,167,239 times
Reputation: 1850

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Have a great weekend guys!!!! Talk to you all Monday

General rules

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt or a leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

10 Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
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Old 11-07-2008, 02:58 PM
 
Location: Incognito
7,005 posts, read 21,342,445 times
Reputation: 5522
Thanks lola. You too!!!!!!
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Old 11-07-2008, 03:18 PM
 
8,518 posts, read 15,646,492 times
Reputation: 7712
23. Never eat spinach with a stranger.

Let's see if anyone remembers where that's from.
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Old 11-07-2008, 03:25 PM
 
Location: In a chartreuse microbus
3,863 posts, read 6,298,999 times
Reputation: 8107
Ha! I've been practicing number 21 for a while now, and it has served me well.
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Old 11-12-2008, 01:33 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,663,697 times
Reputation: 11780
no. 18 is so true............
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Old 11-12-2008, 02:09 PM
 
Location: Grosse Ile Michigan
30,708 posts, read 79,839,619 times
Reputation: 39453
These are good tips to leave a waitress or waiter who has not earned a cash tip. It beats the old standby "Don't pet burning dogs"
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Old 11-12-2008, 02:12 PM
 
25,157 posts, read 53,959,965 times
Reputation: 7058
borrrrrrrrrring
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Old 11-12-2008, 02:13 PM
 
Location: SUNNY AZ
4,589 posts, read 13,167,239 times
Reputation: 1850
Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
borrrrrrrrrring
Those who are bored are boaring
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Old 11-12-2008, 04:22 PM
 
12,585 posts, read 16,959,573 times
Reputation: 15257
Quote:
Originally Posted by lola8822 View Post
Those who are bored are boaring
Awesome!!!

There were some good ones on there. I enjoyed them thanks.
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Old 11-12-2008, 04:23 PM
 
12,585 posts, read 16,959,573 times
Reputation: 15257
"Don't pee near an electrical fence." What?!!
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