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I'm sure if I got divorced, I'd be instantly neater. The house would instantly smell better, too. Oh, and dishes would instantly make their way to the sink rather than sitting there waiting for flies, crust-over and/or the maid, I mean the wife.
LMAO...did you see my post in the housekeeper thread? You sound like me!
I confessed that I'd love to live alone, even temporarily, just to relish in a spotless house!
In your example, the recipient really never did do sh * t to take care of anything; he or she was simply born, and inherited.
In the majority of divorce examples, the woman worked her everlovin' *ss off all throughout the relationship, both inside and outside the home. For years. And years. Aaaaaaand years.
No, she probably (statistically) didn't earn as much per hour as the husband. So what you're saying in that case is that if a man works in a steaming hot boiler room 10 hours a day, 6 days a week his entire life and makes $31,000 annually, and a CEO works in air conditioning and on planes and at catered meetings 8 hours a day, 6 days a week for $245,000, obviously, the CEO is working harder? Because that's what I'm hearing here. The women don't make as much money so that means they're lazy and they're simply lying around on their divans eating truffles and allowing tons of money to fall into their laps.
Sorry fellow, it was the "unearned gravy train" comment that got me. NOT the same situation. Yes, there are exceptions: families where the woman sits on her *ss and doesn't work or clean the house. There are also male exceptions: husbands who sit around on their *sses and don't work or clean the house. You can bring up an exception and so can I. But overall facts are overall facts.
I personally don't know ANY women who sit around, do absolutely nothing for the kids or house and don't work. But then again, I don't live in a trailer park. I'm referring to average middle-class society here; that's my experience so I can't speak for other people's experiences. But I *can* speak for facts and you've read them, whether your own secretly-deserving self ("you" not necessarily meaning the quoted poster) wants to believe in them or not.
I have never been married, so I was never divorced.
I don't care, what I said was true. Many children help their parents clean their house, nurse them when they are old, offer years of love and support, etc...Whether they do or do not, it does not mean they earned the fortunes they inherit. Nobody is going to pay someone vast amounts of money to clean socks. I was not saying housework or hands on work is not real work or that it is not hard work, but when you are just cleaning your own house, then that's just taking care of a chore. That's not being lazy, but it is not a job or work. If I comb my own hair, I haven't earned anything, I was just keeping up my hygiene. But if I am a barber for other people, then I'll get paid. You are not earning an income for taking care of yourself. Where are these facts that most women have worked their ass off for years and years in divorce cases? At what? Household chores? Love? If they didn't want to do it, they shouldn't have done it. If they wanted financial compensation for it, they should have asked before they did it and had it in writing.
If anything, threads like this just make it all that more clear to me that both would be better off working outside the home. Stick the kids in daycare, get a nanny, or skip children all together. This whole alimony thing is the result of bad decisions by both individuals.
LMAO...did you see my post in the housekeeper thread? You sound like me!
I confessed that I'd love to live alone, even temporarily, just to relish in a spotless house!
OMG. I have had this fantasy SO many times. Luckily for men, society keeps our incomes nice and low, childcare nice and high and difficult to arrange that we pretty much have to stay...at least for a while.
But I have long had the fantasy of having my own little apartment, upstairs somewhere in an old Victorian house, maybe north of here, and just...taking care of myself. Not a billion other people.
I I was not saying housework or hands on work is not real work or that it is not hard work, but when you are just cleaning your own house, then that's just taking care of a chore. That's not being lazy, but it is not a job or work.
Yes, it is a job and work. Again I refer you to my boiler room attendant/CEO example above. What you're saying, then, is that the boiler room man's job is way less work and deserves way less than the CEO's? Since you're basing it on money.
Quote:
Originally Posted by poletop1
If I comb my own hair, I haven't earned anything, I was just keeping up my hygiene. But if I am a barber for other people, then I'll get paid.
And if you have a wife, statistics show that she'll (figuratively) comb your hair for you...without getting paid.
Why again is it that her doing your sloppy work for you isn't work but a barber is? Oh yeah, because you don't have to pay a wife to do those things...you simply have to sit back and expect it, even if she too is working outside the home.
Quote:
Originally Posted by poletop1
You are not earning an income for taking care of yourself.
You know, you're right...bor am I earning an income for taking care of my husband in addition to myself, interestingly! Huh, wowsers. Nor for taking care of all my in-laws...nor OUR children TOGETHER that I take care of exclusively. So, you've made your point: women get to work our *ssess of without any financial return. That means we don't "deserve" money later because we were "a gravy train". An extremely hard-working one...(scratching head). Thanks for the clarifications; at least you've stated your case, as you see it.
I have never been married, so I was never divorced.
I don't care, what I said was true. Many children help their parents clean their house, nurse them when they are old, offer years of love and support, etc...Whether they do or do not, it does not mean they earned the fortunes they inherit. Nobody is going to pay someone vast amounts of money to clean socks. I was not saying housework or hands on work is not real work or that it is not hard work, but when you are just cleaning your own house, then that's just taking care of a chore. That's not being lazy, but it is not a job or work. If I comb my own hair, I haven't earned anything, I was just keeping up my hygiene. But if I am a barber for other people, then I'll get paid. You are not earning an income for taking care of yourself. Where are these facts that most women have worked their ass off for years and years in divorce cases? At what? Household chores? Love? If they didn't want to do it, they shouldn't have done it. If they wanted financial compensation for it, they should have asked before they did it and had it in writing.
I get what you are saying...but there is another side to this as well. IF these women didn't take care of the kids and the housework and do the cooking...etc, they'd be hiring housekeepers, hiring nanny's or childcare and eating out an awful lot.
We sat down and figured it out once when my kids were little. 4 in daycare would have cost us $5400 a month....the housekeeper would have cost us $500 a month and all that take-out and the restaurant visits would have cost about $700 a month. It was cheaper for me to stay home and do it myself.
IF these women didn't take care of the kids and the housework and do the cooking...etc, they'd be hiring housekeepers, hiring nanny's or childcare and eating out an awful lot.
And IF there were no wife at all, the guy would either be paying through the nose buying gifts for his trophy girlfriend to do at least some of it, or would be paying it 100% himself without the girlfriend, or would be living in absolute sh*t and filth and without sex, BTW...because he works soooooo hard, who's got the energy for cleaning the house afterward? (smacking forehead) Oh yeah...wives who work outside the home and retain the majority of the housework anyway. The UNPAID housework, as the added insult, and as certain members like to drive home like salt into a jagged wound.
OMG. I have had this fantasy SO many times. Luckily for men, society keeps our incomes nice and low, childcare nice and high and difficult to arrange that we pretty much have to stay...at least for a while.
But I have long had the fantasy of having my own little apartment, upstairs somewhere in an old Victorian house, maybe north of here, and just...taking care of myself. Not a billion other people.
Oh I remember moving to NC 6yrs ago and looking into teaching down here. The childcare alone was ridiculous! $5400 a month for our kids. As a teacher I would have made $34K to start...so I'd basically be paying $20K a year for someone else to keep my children...and two of them were in school full time at that point!
I get what you are saying...but there is another side to this as well. IF these women didn't take care of the kids and the housework and do the cooking...etc, they'd be hiring housekeepers, hiring nanny's or childcare and eating out an awful lot.
We sat down and figured it out once when my kids were little. 4 in daycare would have cost us $5400 a month....the housekeeper would have cost us $500 a month and all that take-out and the restaurant visits would have cost about $700 a month. It was cheaper for me to stay home and do it myself.
Why have so many children given the man you married? I don't get it.
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The house would instantly smell better, too. Oh, and dishes would instantly make their way to the sink rather than sitting there waiting for flies, crust-over and/or the maid, I mean the wife. 
Because that's what I'm hearing here. The women don't make as much money so that means they're lazy and they're simply lying around on their divans eating truffles and allowing tons of money to fall into their laps.