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Hi, I'm a 53 year old female and I'd like to tell my story. I have been reading all your posts with interest. I saw a post where someone said that people online are not what they pretend to be. Well, that's news to me, I'm always upfront and truthful in my posts, and if you knew me in person you would know that I am not one to pretend I'm something else.
When I was a teenager I wasn't interested in dating, this worried my dad. Dad kept fixing me up with his friend's sons. I might add that I grew up without a mother because my mom ran off with dad's best friend when I was 3 and we never heard from her again, so dad raised us by himself, we didn't even have a stepmother. What dad didn't realize was that the guys were immature, they drank, cursed, some did drugs, and most had long hair as this was back in the 70's, and this was not what I wanted in a man that was mature, that I could marry and have children with, and spend the rest of my life with. One day, dad came in all excited telling me he had found the perfect guy for me and that I was going to love this guy. I had my doubts, but dad had told the guy what a good cook I was, and had invited him over to dinner so I could meet him. So I cooked pork chops smothered in mushroom gravy. When the guy walked into the house, I said to myself, there he is, there's the man I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. Like me he was 18, he had short hair, didn't drink or do drugs, but he didn't have good looks, but I loved him despite his bad looks. However, he was polite and responded if I said something to him, but he didn't initiate any conversation with me at all, instead he hit it off with my brother, and he would come over and hang out with my brother. I was devestated because I loved him so, and he didn't seem to notice me, so one day my brother asked him what he thought of his sister, he asked which one, my brother told him, and he said, oh I think she's real cute, she's gonna break a lot of hearts when she grows up, so my brother asked, How old do you think my sister is?, and the guy said, oh 8 maybe 9, and my brother told him I was 18, after that he was taking me out every night. The problem was that I've always looked years younger than I am, but once he found out that Iwas two months older than him, you couldn't keep him away from me. Surprise, dad tried to talk me out of marrying him, because dad thought I shouldn't marry the only guy I ever dated. We have been married 33 years now, we have one child, a boy who is 23 years old. My husband is the love of my life, and my best friend! You would think we were newlyweds the way we treat each other, you'd never guess that we've been married for as long as we have. I'm not trying to brag, just trying to let you know that you can find your soul mate.
One of the reasons that we fell in love with each other is that we have the same beliefs.
Hubby believes that a woman shouldn't work, that the man is the head of the house, and handles the finances, and that women should have long hair. Hubby likes a clean house, clean laundry, and good food.
I wanted a man that would take care of me, that was mature, and be a good companion.
Hubby works, handles the finances, and dictates.
I keep the house spotless, the laundry done, fix him a good breakfast and lunch, have dinner done when he gets home, and I do what he tells me, I don't question him, nor do I tell him if I disagree with him. I have never worked, and I don't know squat about our finances. I always let him have it his way. He is very happy, and I am very happy. I have very long hair, hubby doesn't even want me to get it trimmed, because he says I have the most beautiful hair he's ever seen and he doesn't want it cut. I would like to cut my hair, but won't because he would be unhappy. I still look a lot younger than I am, I'm wondering if that will ever change. I would like to look close to my age. If you want to see some dresses I recently made, you can find them here http://www.city-data.com/forum/hobbi...-sewing-2.html they're at the bottom of the page.
I'm not quite getting the gist of this or if there's a question posed. Was this just to perhaps offset some of the other opinions you've seen stated here?
I'd agree in part, people seem to think here that nobody's ever happy with being with the first person they meet when young if they're lucky enough to meet a great match for them.
While I don't think it's demeaning or otherwise to have the traditional marriage either, I would get in with your hubby on finances and the like from time to time just to be familiar with what is, isn't, investments, and otherwise. This relationship style in my view is not a bad thing or the best thing either, but I would still want my wife to be "in the loop" for some of these things for her own sake and sanity should the worst happen to me, the same as getting a good life-insurance policy.
The reality is men's life-span is shorter, and contrary to a couple of opinions, the BBC and many others are confirming the gap is still widening. So it is very likely you will find yourself having to figure these other things out the hard way later. Not just for your own sake, but you could miss out on perhaps financially helping out your son later as well by not doing so.
Yes, this is just in response to other threads I've read here. Why doesn't everybody just be theirselves online? If you met me offline you would find me no different than you did online. Just curious why people pretend to be something they are not just because they are online.
You have a very good point about the finances. I never really thought of it that way before. I was always relieved that I didn't have to think about it.
Yes, this is just in response to other threads I've read here. Why doesn't everybody just be theirselves online? If you met me offline you would find me no different than you did online. Just curious why people pretend to be something they are not just because they are online.
You have a very good point about the finances. I never really thought of it that way before. I was always relieved that I didn't have to think about it.
Some put on persona's or airs to feel like something/someone different or to get a laugh, but most are doing the same thing as you state you are, just being themselves. I'm not really seeing much of what you're referring to here, but my scope is fairly limited to this one section of the forum and none of the interest sections either. Just not enough time during work and doing other things after for it.
And this one gives me plenty of entertainment value as it is.
Congratulations on your happy marriage. As long as you and your husband are happy with it, that's all that's important. I would take Wayne's advice about finances, however. My wife died at age 51. She was the picture of health -- ate healthy, exercised daily, maintained a proper weight -- everything "they" say to do, but one night she went to take her bath and a blood vessel burst. Poof!
It's not smart to stay totally in the dark.
I think most people are pretty much themselves online. I know I am, and I've met lots of people who I've known online, and I can't think of any who were much different in person.
Hi Jeanette, nice to hear some folks still have a traditional married life and enjoy it!
As for being yourself online. This might sound weird, but I'm more 'myself' online than off. I don't think much about the image I'm presenting or whether people will like me. I just do my best to say what I mean and help out where I can. In person I don't find that quite as easy to do.
I was devestated because I loved him so, and he didn't seem to notice me, so one day my brother asked him what he thought of his sister, he asked which one, my brother told him, and he said, oh I think she's real cute, she's gonna break a lot of hearts when she grows up, so my brother asked, How old do you think my sister is?, and the guy said, oh 8 maybe 9, and my brother told him I was 18, after that he was taking me out every night. The problem was that I've always looked years younger than I am, but once he found out that Iwas two months older than him, you couldn't keep him away from me.
That's an extremely bizarre story.
I've never heard of an 18-year-old who looked like an 8-year-old.
Perhaps your father should've realized that the reason you weren't interested in dating was because you hadn't reached puberty yet.
Well, glad it all worked out in the end; good luck to you.
Hi, I'm a 53 year old female and I'd like to tell my story. I have been reading all your posts with interest. I saw a post where someone said that people online are not what they pretend to be. Well, that's news to me, I'm always upfront and truthful in my posts, and if you knew me in person you would know that I am not one to pretend I'm something else.
When I was a teenager I wasn't interested in dating, this worried my dad. Dad kept fixing me up with his friend's sons. I might add that I grew up without a mother because my mom ran off with dad's best friend when I was 3 and we never heard from her again, so dad raised us by himself, we didn't even have a stepmother. What dad didn't realize was that the guys were immature, they drank, cursed, some did drugs, and most had long hair as this was back in the 70's, and this was not what I wanted in a man that was mature, that I could marry and have children with, and spend the rest of my life with. One day, dad came in all excited telling me he had found the perfect guy for me and that I was going to love this guy. I had my doubts, but dad had told the guy what a good cook I was, and had invited him over to dinner so I could meet him. So I cooked pork chops smothered in mushroom gravy. When the guy walked into the house, I said to myself, there he is, there's the man I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. Like me he was 18, he had short hair, didn't drink or do drugs, but he didn't have good looks, but I loved him despite his bad looks. However, he was polite and responded if I said something to him, but he didn't initiate any conversation with me at all, instead he hit it off with my brother, and he would come over and hang out with my brother. I was devestated because I loved him so, and he didn't seem to notice me, so one day my brother asked him what he thought of his sister, he asked which one, my brother told him, and he said, oh I think she's real cute, she's gonna break a lot of hearts when she grows up, so my brother asked, How old do you think my sister is?, and the guy said, oh 8 maybe 9, and my brother told him I was 18, after that he was taking me out every night. The problem was that I've always looked years younger than I am, but once he found out that Iwas two months older than him, you couldn't keep him away from me. Surprise, dad tried to talk me out of marrying him, because dad thought I shouldn't marry the only guy I ever dated. We have been married 33 years now, we have one child, a boy who is 23 years old. My husband is the love of my life, and my best friend! You would think we were newlyweds the way we treat each other, you'd never guess that we've been married for as long as we have. I'm not trying to brag, just trying to let you know that you can find your soul mate.
One of the reasons that we fell in love with each other is that we have the same beliefs.
Hubby believes that a woman shouldn't work, that the man is the head of the house, and handles the finances, and that women should have long hair. Hubby likes a clean house, clean laundry, and good food.
Yeah, but what do YOU believe???
I wanted a man that would take care of me, that was mature, and be a good companion.
Hubby works, handles the finances, and dictates.
I keep the house spotless, the laundry done, fix him a good breakfast and lunch, have dinner done when he gets home, and I do what he tells me, I don't question him, nor do I tell him if I disagree with him. I have never worked, and I don't know squat about our finances. I always let him have it his way. He is very happy, and I am very happy. I have very long hair, hubby doesn't even want me to get it trimmed, because he says I have the most beautiful hair he's ever seen and he doesn't want it cut. I would like to cut my hair, but won't because he would be unhappy. I still look a lot younger than I am, I'm wondering if that will ever change. I would like to look close to my age. If you want to see some dresses I recently made, you can find them here http://www.city-data.com/forum/hobbi...-sewing-2.html they're at the bottom of the page.
Jeanette
As long as you're happy, that's what matters. Personally, I could NEVER be happy being somebody's doormat, and that's essentially what you are.
Yes, this is just in response to other threads I've read here. Why doesn't everybody just be theirselves online? If you met me offline you would find me no different than you did online. Just curious why people pretend to be something they are not just because they are online.
You have a very good point about the finances. I never really thought of it that way before. I was always relieved that I didn't have to think about it.
Who's pretending to be something they're not? Can you name names? Give us specifics? How do YOU know people are pretending to be something other than themselves? Have you met every single person who posts in here?
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