Confused, do I need to make my liking for her clear, or she already knows it? (boyfriend, married)
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Ok here is the situation. I've asked this girl out who's a rental consultant in my apartment. I have been talking to her 2 days a week for around 5-10 mins for last 2 months and before that I have been talking to her maybe 2-3 times a month for like 4 months. We seem to get along well. I do have a crush over her and I'm now beginning to get over her. Now first time I asked her out by saying "do you wanna go out sometime and she says "what do you mean, I have a bf so do i mean go out as friends ?" and I said.."Ok we can go out as friends", she says "Ok going out as friends is fine".
We continue talking to each other normally after that.I once again casually ask her next week" so when are you buying me coffee" and she says I have no money..left. Next week I again ask her to buy me coffee and she says "yea we need to go for coffee"..and then I get her number and call her, leave msg and no reply and text her and no reply. We're supposed to be friends at least but I get the bar guy treatment on phone but she talks absolutely normal @ the apartments, she laughs at my jokes etc. Very friendly as usual and occasionally she will touch me while talking to me. She always talks nicely to me and I joke with her frequently, sometimes she says I'm funny..sometimes she says I'm crazy. Not a big deal I get that from girls..sometimes, don't mean she's all over me. I also invited her and her other colleagues to my apartment for dinner and we all had dinner and we all had good time that was a fortnight ago. At this point I figure she's a real nice person, respectful etc. So I'll keep on pursuing her. All this time till today, she seems physically comfortable to me. She's comfortable getting into my personal space,and occasionally touches my shoulders, writs and while she was at dinner our..forearms were touching for a 5-6 seconds and it was not accidental. Sometimes she will occasionally get real close into my personal space without touching me and seems comfortable although I'm not as comfortable doing the same.
Anyways i again ask her for coffee and she says she needs to spend time with her bf. I first thought the bf thing was a lie but she convinces me and now I believe that she has a bf. She says that it would be not fair to her bf if she goes out for coffee with another man ..and I'm like really you have a bf, I didn't know that and she says she's been with him for some time now. Then I joked to her..."bastard..don't ever introduce him to me..else I might kill him" it sounds bad but she knows i'm funny and she laughed at it in a good way and we had 10 min conversation after this. After this conversation, we reach agreement to go for coffee with her friends and my friends together and not by ourselves. I decide I can't pursue her as she's taken and I feel that it should be clear to her that I like her as well. But I continue being friends with her so the coffee is still on.
Next time 3 days later, I see her again,...First I go up in their office area earlier to talk about the dinner party pics and they were all busy with customers so I come back and start playing pool in next room. While I'm playing pool alone..in my apartment complex where she works and then she comes from behind to get a glass of water and while she says from behind..."are you ignoring me". I wasn't really ignoring her @ all. There really is no basis for her to say that I'm ignoring her as i wasn't so I said.."why would I ignore you, you guys are pretty busy, I don't want to disturb you guys" and then we have another 5-10 minute friendly conversation. Now this thing where she says i'm ignoring her has me confused. What does she mean by that?
---> Is it that I'm thinking too much about that or is she hinting something when she says that I'm ignoring her. Is she trying to confuse me. Or maybe its just a innocuous friendly banter, tease, flirt?
--> More importantly, do you guys think, she knows clearly by now that I like her or do i just need to go one day and tell her that.
Obviously she has a bf so i'm gonna back off and take it easy from here on, will still be friendly with her but I wanna make sure she knows I liked her before I found out about her bf.
-->Also Why is she sending this confusing signal when she knows I like her or is it that she still is not sure about my intentions. Is that possible?I would think a girl would know it for sure when a guy asks her for going out once and for coffee 4 times in like 6-7 weeks although I have never clearly said i like her. I have always actively pursued her, I started conversations with her and made efforts to be around her and in the process I have become friends with her and her other 3 female colleagues, all married and I invited all of them for dinner as I mentioned before.
She's a very nice, smart girl, very friendly with everyone and not the manipulative kind And she still is very friendly with me.
If she says she has a BF then stop wasting your time and look for someone else. Its situations like this why I dont believe men and women can be friends without one (or both) of them having intentions to get together at some point down the road.
If she says she has a BF then stop wasting your time and look for someone else. Its situations like this why I dont believe men and women can be friends without one (or both) of them having intentions to get together at some point down the road.
It seems like when men and women aren't attracted to each other, is the most successful "Friendships".
It seems like when men and women aren't attracted to each other, is the most successful "Friendships".
ding, ding. i think this is why women tend to get jealous and weird when their boyfriend has really attractive female friends. if the female friends werent particularly good looking, there isnt a reason to worry.
or (however this i dont think happens that much) the people involved have known each other since children, and it would seem weird to date. i was friends with a guy since 2nd grade who asked me out in high school. he was gorgeous and looked like that actor james franco. i just couldnt do it! ive known him since we were little kids and i know he drools when he sleeps!
Well it is indeed true that she has a BF, she isn't lying and she's living with him, I believe. I'm just stepping back and seeing what it all means @ the end of it especially the ignoring line is confusing.
And yes its true I'm maintaining basic friendship to see if something works out in future but that does not mean I'm gonna be waiting here just for her. Absobloodylutely not. I might even ask her to hook me up with some of her other single friends .
It seems like when men and women aren't attracted to each other, is the most successful "Friendships".
Thats possible but I would still avoid it. Straight men enjoy hanging out with other straight men. They drink beer, fart, play video games, watch sports, break stuff, work on cars, etc... When men want a female friend who is already taken, the majority of the time, its because they are taking a number to get in line or are going to at some point try to talk her into sex. I've seen it too many times to believe anything otherwise. But hey, whatever works for individual people. I just know for myself that will never work for me or my partner.
She likes attention...She probably is with a guy who treats her like crap, sometimes he can make her happy and she'll keep away from you, sometime he'll **** her off and she'll be nice to you. Overall it's a waste of your time. Sounds like you've fallen too hard for her and odds are high it you'll be disappointed...
Well so far she has always been nice to me. She's never been mean to me. I never stretched it and tried to extend friendship by calling her...but face to face, she's been very nice to me so far. No exceptions.
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