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All you're doing is looking at something you don't understand, and dreaming up (invalid) reasons in order wrap a nice bow on it, and say you understand it.
Rather than that - just say you don't understand it. That's perfectly fine..
I don't suffer from social anxiety, the "loners" I work with don't either - we simply don't require the same amount of interaction with others to be happy.
It's a spectrum - the person who spends all his free nights hanging out playing poker with 3 friends, might be considered a "loner" or "boring" to the person who feels the need to be the life of the party at raves etc (or whatever the kids do these days).
My relationship with my wife is more than enough for me.
Social anxiety, lack of ability to communicate, etc not required. Just a social meter that fills much quicker than others..
...I think you must have not read my entire post. Obviously, like myself, you are just introverted, rather than being a "loner". (or "hermit" as I look at the term)
What we both posted are basically similar. I was just stating it so people can tell the difference and not mistake introverted people as anti-social, sad "loners". We are just as happy, fulfilled and sociably acceptable as extroverts, but don't have the need to always engage in social activities.
So, to anwer the OP. I don't really have friends, so if my guy didn't either (which he doesn't), that would be just fine w/ me, we can have our own fun spending time together. I wouldn't want him being this social butterfly while I preferred to do things just the 2 of us. That would honestly make me feel lonlier than if I didn't have a boyfriend at all because I would have a "it's all them against me" type feeling & wonder why I'm not enough.
First of all, it's comforting to know I'm not the only person who feels like I do.
I never saw myself as a loner. I have a few friends, online and IRL I talk to. I've dated before, but not so much lately. I am very nice and helpful to strangers, I hold the door for people, help them with things they ask me for it. (I'm tall so I get asked alot )
I just prefer to be alone most of the time. It's not because I feel I'm better then anyone, or that I hate the population. I just like spending time with me. I know that sounds selfish, and maybe it is.
I don't like pushed into making friends, or being looked at because I am alone. I am for a reason, and it's my own choice. I've been this way since HS. I'm used to it, I enjoy it. It's nice to do my own thing, without needing the aproval of people. I go where I want, do what I like and live to the fullest. If someone wants to enjoy it with me, that's fine. I not I'll do it myself.
I just not the type of person who needs to be inundated friends on a daily basis, has lots of girls in his pocket and all the latest stuff to enjoy himself. I enjoy the bare necessities of life :
A few friends, some interaction with the opposite sex and a few things to keep me interested. I'm just trying to be me, nothing esle.
I guess I'm indepentant in my ways, some people like that some don't. I really don't care if you do or not, It's my life not your's.
Pretty much how I am. I like my solitude but can be social when need be. Just because someone prefers solitude doesn't mean their people skills are bad. If anything, introverts can spot phony people from a mile away. I can go months without seeing my friends and that's fine. When we do click up, it's like we picked up where we left off and that's ok. I think extroverts are phonies because they try too hard to be seen.
...I think you must have not read my entire post. Obviously, like myself, you are just introverted, rather than being a "loner". (or "hermit" as I look at the term)
What we both posted are basically similar. I was just stating it so people can tell the difference and not mistake introverted people as anti-social, sad "loners". We are just as happy, fulfilled and sociably acceptable as extroverts, but don't have the need to always engage in social activities.
you might benefit from reading the article on wikipedia about loners.
You're operating under the assumption that loners are people with bad social skills.
Nope.
That's like me saying all social people are like the girls on Girls Gone Wild, or the guys who manipulate them.
Being confident, knowing how to charm and be personable, knowing how to look people in the eyes, aren't exclusive to guys who must call up their guy friends every weekend to see what they're doing.
I work in a field defined by social interaction, I've had the "loner" talk with coworkers before and you'd be surprised how many there actually are.
Don't confuse lack of desire with lack of ability.
No, I understand the difference as I clarified "a loner who doesn't relate well to people." I like independent-thinking, private men who have the ability to be confident and charming in social situations and also enjoy their alone time. In fact, that is very similar to my own personality and that of my SO. I am very confident, engaging (so I've been told) in social situations, but I also really enjoy my alone time and have pastimes that reflect this. However, I have both the desire and ability for both social interactions as well as "loner" activities. I do not fake it.
Someone with the social ability to influence people combined with the independence to enjoy their own company can be very attractive to the opposite sex. I am not particularly attracted to men who can not relate well/influence others OR, conversely, to men who need too much external social validation from others. It's all about balance. But every woman is different. As I said, I do think many women are attracted to the extroverted Alpha-male who has the ability to influence others as that is often connected to power/prestige which is an attractive trait to many women.
Location: where people are either too stupid to leave or too stuck to move
3,982 posts, read 6,688,919 times
Reputation: 3689
Quote:
Originally Posted by burgler09
It was a joke.
see i'm so dark and gloomy, i can't even tell the difference between a joke
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