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Maybe you could consider narrowing your letter down quite-a-bit there dude.
Although that is an excellent way for you to let out your true feelings, I would not recomend sending her this mess!
I would let it rest for a few days....send her something simple, to the point, and then leave the ball in her court. Do not contact, call, text, email, or IM in the meantime!
I didn't read all that, but whatI got through, reminded me of "he's just not that into you" movie when she talks about how back in the day all you had was one phone line w/ one voice mail and how due to technology rejection can come from many directions i.e. text and email.
Anyways, I'm going to commend you for you ability to type that long of an email drunk. I'm having trouble enough with this post. If it wasn't for firefox spell check it'd probably ineligible. rep'd.
Drunk dialing and drunk texting...never a good thing. You've learned that lesson the hard way. Your second mistake was not respecting her wishes when she asked for space.
So, the letter - and my two cents. If this letter was written to me:
1. I never would have read it all the way through (though I did for the purpose of posting this reply - yeah, I know...why?).
2. I'd feel like you were trying to make me feel guilty. Multiple times throughout the letter.
3. Your past relationships don't need to be shared with me after-the-fact.
4. There is no need for you to tell me everyyyy detail about everything. Way, way, way too much information not necessary to getting your main points across.
5. I'd feel like you were throwing it all back on me ... blaming me for not trying hard enough, not giving you a chance.
6. I'd think you were extremely desperate, regardless of the fact that you stated you don't spend every waking moment thinking about it.
To be perfectly honest, if I was "Megan" I would tear up the letter, throw it in the trash and move on with my life. You've laid way too much on her. IF she had feelings for you at all, she may have been willing to overlook the drunken stupidity. I doubt this letter will fix anything, if there was even anything to fix in the first place.
You're obviously in a lot of pain about this because you so totally screwed up. But you have to understand that if she cannot accept you when you are drunk and over-emotional and paranoid that this relationship was not going to work out anyway.
People are never at their best 100 percent of the time. In order to love someone you have to be UNDERSTANDING AND FORGIVING, neither of which, it appears that Megan is. Therefore, why would you want to have a relationship with someone who only loves you when you are "perfect", knowing full well that you cannot be perfect for the rest of your life.
If this woman was so wonderful, she would have said. Ok, no problem, I LOVE YOU JUST THE SAME ANYWAY, not turn totally against you and walk away. It sounds like it was VERY EASY for her to walk away from this. Does this sound to you like someone who was invested emotionally? Nope, me neither.
Do yourself A HUGE favor and find a girl who loves and adores you when you are at your worst and doesn't care. Find a girl who does not have these unrealistic expectations of perfection and turns cold if they are not met. You will be infinitely more happy.
And please forget about the letter. It's only going to make matters worse.
Move on. Find a better girl. There's zillions of them out there. ya know.
As a woman, I can't say that I would be happy receiving such a letter. I only read half of it (sorry). You pretty much told her that you're emotionally broken and she's the one to fix you. That's a lot of responsibility to lay on a person. I don't know if it's possible to be fixed in such a way by somebody other than yourself. I'm sorry you're in so much pain and hope you take measures to heal yourself. Wish I had advice to offer. In the past, I've found meditation centers to be useful and supportive.
You screwed up - and not where you think you screwed up. You made a mistake the night she went out with the girls. OK, it wasn't a relationship breaker. What you did afterwards was. She asked for time, you insisted on meeting. She told you how important her classes were and said she needed time to focus and again, you harrassed and stalked her. Dude, leave a woman alone when she says she needs time! What part of "give me some time" do you not understand? Then, she says it's over so what do you do? you contact her and contact her and send her text messages and call her and write her. THEN, you play the pity card. Good grief! I read your letter up until you started with the "I was abused as a kid" pity party. It doesn't change what you did. If you need to deal with that part of your life, go see a therapist. So now you want to lay some guilt on her for that.
I'm sorry but I think this letter won't accomplish much and will probably only make things worse. This is the kind of letter I'd expect from someone going thru a divorce, not just a few months of dating. It's actually kind of crazy, stalkerish sounding because you were dating for such a short time. Plus, it did sound like a giant guilt trip. You can't expect someone else to fix you or make you whole, it's never going to happen. I'd forget about her and truly move on which obviously you haven't done. I'd also quickly get counselling/therapy for your abusive past. Forget about dating for now and concentrate on yourself. Good luck!
I read the post but couldnt get through the letter. Meghan seems to be very insightful and not one to waste time on a relationship that, in her opinion, is going nowhere. That letter would be proof to her that she was right.
You appear to be very emotional and clingy. That's a bit scary for today's "independent" women. And the letter is just too long really, I doubt that even she read the whole thing. Honestly, I think you just gave her one more reason to stay away from you.
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