There is often someone else out there willing to do what you won't (dating, boyfriend)
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I was going to say "always", and I'd say that's a safe bet but I'll stick to "often". Regarless, I live by this. There is so much opportunity out there, so many good people, so much available to you. If you are in a crappy relationship, don't worry. Someone else is waiting for the opportunity to make you happy. Take care of those who take care of you. Someone else is out there is just waiting to pluck them off the curb, take 'em home, dust 'em off and treat 'em right.
There was a time when I'd think to myself, look at this guy/gal, cheating, lying, sneaking around and married. And here I am, a good woman, with such a profound respect for marriage, total marriage material and I can't seem to get a break from the psychos.
What I didn't think about were all the good men that I let slip through my fingers, the ones who showed interest, and the ones who literally tried to pull me away from the mess I was in. They were THERE. I had options.
I wasted up to 4 years waiting for change. I'd tell them I was getting fed up, but what motivation did they have to do anything about it? They had no reason to think I'd leave if I'm still there 2, 3, 4 years later. They're responsible for their betrayals, but I chose to stay.
I also thought, heck, what's the point of leaving in order for him to get the point? I won't get the benefit of that change if I'm not with him. I thought he had to come around. After, all, that is the right thing to do, si? I didn't realize that, sometimes, the only way to put an end to the madness is to remove yourself from the situation. They wouldn't put an end to it, so I had to.
Of course, I figured out where all that crazy came from. Once I did, I had control. Healthy control. I don't believe in fighting for my relationships anymore. I'll make my concerns known. But I'll leave it to them to decide if they want to change. It sounds cliche, but life is really that short. I'm not going to force anyone to do anything they don't want to I have no desire to convince anyone that I'm "the one". I'm okay with being alone, but I know I don't have to be.
It's out there folks, all the happiness your pea pickin' lil' hearts can stand. Go out there and make it happen.
I've remarked a few times about how many people we encounter in our day to day lives without ever considering them for a romantic relationship. There was a thread on here a while back about someone interested in a grocery store cashier--and some people were giving the guy grief about it. But really, why not? It's just that, if you end up breaking up, you can never go back int that store
I agree. I have discovered that if I decide I'm okay not being in a couple then I can concentrate on making me happy. After all, I deserve the best life has to offer.
I've remarked a few times about how many people we encounter in our day to day lives without ever considering them for a romantic relationship. There was a thread on here a while back about someone interested in a grocery store cashier--and some people were giving the guy grief about it. But really, why not? It's just that, if you end up breaking up, you can never go back int that store
LOL...now that's funnay.
If you don't want a cashier, that's fine too. There's plenty of what you do want out there.
All I was saying is that we overlook potential relationships every day. Why should one have to go somewhere specific to "meet people", like some people do with bars? Or "singles events"? What's wrong with the bank teller, the guy pumping your gas, the person at the Subway? (not at the subway, that might be a little different).
All I was saying is that we overlook potential relationships every day. Why should one have to go somewhere specific to "meet people", like some people do with bars? Or "singles events"? What's wrong with the bank teller, the guy pumping your gas, the person at the Subway? (not at the subway, that might be a little different).
Oh, dear. When I saw the subject header to this thread, the first thing I thought of was an old boyfriend from back on my 20s who wanted to do things I didn't, as it were, and used, "Well, there's always someone else who will" to try to coerce me.
"You know, you're right," I said. "Go ahead and find her."
But yes, the point goes the other way, too. If you're not getting what you want in a relationship, there's no sense staying in it. Voice your concerns, watch what happens, work together if you must, but if nothing changes, move on. I tell my girlfriends all the time, "Time you spend with the wrong person is time you could be spending with the right one."
Oh, dear. When I saw the subject header to this thread, the first thing I thought of was an old boyfriend from back on my 20s who wanted to do things I didn't, as it were, and used, "Well, there's always someone else who will" to try to coerce me.
"You know, you're right," I said. "Go ahead and find her."
LOL, that's exactly what I thought, too!!!!!!!
As for the real intent, I wish it were that simple. It really isn't, unless you live in or near a large city with a lot of options. For those living in rural areas as I do, it's really difficult. This is a great place to live BUT most of the people have grown up here, married young, and have been in the same social circles for a long time. It's tough for newcomers.
I haven't met ONE PERSON from my town or even near my town on the online dating sites I've joined. I'm communicating with someone who seems nice and lives an hour and a half away. We'll see how that goes. As for the people I encounter in my daily life? They're other women or married men.
I don't mean to sound pessimistic and I do remain hopeful but platitudes ring hollow and don't apply to many situations.
As for the real intent, I wish it were that simple. It really isn't, unless you live in or near a large city with a lot of options. For those living in rural areas as I do, it's really difficult. This is a great place to live BUT most of the people have grown up here, married young, and have been in the same social circles for a long time. It's tough for newcomers.
I haven't met ONE PERSON from my town or even near my town on the online dating sites I've joined. I'm communicating with someone who seems nice and lives an hour and a half away. We'll see how that goes. As for the people I encounter in my daily life? They're other women or married men.
I don't mean to sound pessimistic and I do remain hopeful but platitudes ring hollow and don't apply to many situations.
True, some people have more options that other for various reasons. I'd have to move before I settled. I know that's not always an option and it's not easy either. But it is not impossible.
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