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I'm retired and widowed, I had to start over after my wife died three years ago. The single life after sixty can be a discouraging one, I'm in a small town that has no night life or culture for that matter, we never know how things will work out but the chances of meeting new friends is slim to none at my age. I've tried online dating sites and they've been a good place to meet some very nice women, still, I've got to be thinking of moving from a house that was going to be my last. All in all I hope that those who are contemplating their retirement think far enough ahead to include the possibility of being alone in those last years. It's best to be in a metropolitan area for that scenario.
I was 48 and had been married for 25 years and had five children. She found someone else she thought was better for her. The following week I was gone on a business trip and returned to an empty house and empty bank accounts. My car had died the week before. I moved downtown to a small studio apartment within walking distance to work and that was my life as I was paying spousal and child support.
At age 50 I asked out a former coworker I'd known, admired and respected for five years. Fortunately, she'd always felt the same about me. She really had nothing material either (but she did have a car ) since she'd spent 16 years as a single mother raising two daughters with absolutely no support, whatsoever, from her ex - the girls' father. At that point we both started over.
Fast forward 12 years. We married shortly after we started dating. She retired early. I retired sooner than originally planned. We packed up, left California, bought a modest home on a lake and love where we are. She's now 62. I'm 64 and between our pensions and Social Security we'll never be world travelers but we're comfortable. In the end, does anything else really matter?
I didn't for sure. I did a lot of research of all kinds. My first choice was Brazil, but I considered Uruguay, Costa Rica and Ireland and less so, Portugal.
Brazil did not pan out because of the sudden death of my cousin who lived there, and I did not feel equipped to live in as demanding a city a Rio without someone to lean on in the beginning. I rejected the others for various reasons. I made a trip to Portugal then, and did not feel overwhelmed. But upon return it seemed better and better, and I finally said, what the hell - yes, that's it.
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Was it costly to make the move?
This was 1999, the dollar was very high and the value of the Portuguese escudo was very low. Given my relatively small savings to work with the move would not be feasible now, even though my SS and pension were good, though not lavish.
The costs were storage for 40 cartons of possessions, very small fee for visa and residency application, over 200 for translating all documents into Portuguese, plane ticket...and at the last minute I decided to go the Madeira, a Portuguese maritime province off the coast of Africa, where I had never been before...but it looked pretty and warm. So, I rented an apartment on the internet - it cost half of what I had been paying in the U.S. and included gas and electric. Thus, all told the move was cheap.
At the end of six months I moved to the mainland, southwest coast of Portugal and I bought a small three-story house in a tiny dead end street with only one other residence and the back door of the small Red Cross bldg.
I didn't buy a car for awhile as the town was walkable, and when I got cabin fever I rented a budget car for lots of day trips.
A photo of that house is below, with magnificent sea views from the third floor balconies.
I'm not sure what starting over actually means. My wife and I have lived in one place since I graduated from grad school in 1978. After 33 years here, we are retiring and we are moving 650 miles north to a little(and slightly famous) coastal town in Maine. We know a number of people there, but we are moving into a big old house, and essentially starting all over again with a big new adventure, every bit as new(and every bot as scary) as it was when I started a new career 33 years ago when I was 29.
I was 48 and had been married for 25 years and had five children. She found someone else she thought was better for her. The following week I was gone on a business trip and returned to an empty house and empty bank accounts. My car had died the week before. I moved downtown to a small studio apartment within walking distance to work and that was my life as I was paying spousal and child support.
At age 50 I asked out a former coworker I'd known, admired and respected for five years. Fortunately, she'd always felt the same about me. She really had nothing material either (but she did have a car ) since she'd spent 16 years as a single mother raising two daughters with absolutely no support, whatsoever, from her ex - the girls' father. At that point we both started over.
Fast forward 12 years. We married shortly after we started dating. She retired early. I retired sooner than originally planned. We packed up, left California, bought a modest home on a lake and love where we are. She's now 62. I'm 64 and between our pensions and Social Security we'll never be world travelers but we're comfortable. In the end, does anything else really matter?
I tried to rep you but I guess I have to wait till I can do it again!
This is an amazing story. And an amazing comeback. And a real inspiration.
Thanks for telling it.
At the end of six months I moved to the mainland, southwest coast of Portugal and I bought a small three-story house in a tiny dead end street with only one other residence and the back door of the small Red Cross bldg.
I didn't buy a car for awhile as the town was walkable, and when I got cabin fever I rented a budget car for lots of day trips.
A photo of that house is below, with magnificent sea views from the third floor balconies.
Wow what a gorgeous place. I am green and purple with envy.
What about health insurance and medical care there?
I'm not sure what starting over actually means. My wife and I have lived in one place since I graduated from grad school in 1978. After 33 years here, we are retiring and we are moving 650 miles north to a little(and slightly famous) coastal town in Maine. We know a number of people there, but we are moving into a big old house, and essentially starting all over again with a big new adventure, every bit as new(and every bot as scary) as it was when I started a new career 33 years ago when I was 29.
A different kind of story, but it sure qualifies as starting over!
When I woke up this morning and my husband had the TV on (CNBC for me) and one of the guys was talking about being at something for Reagan 25 years ago where he said something like - it's a new morning in America and new hope or something like that.
So many people have had their hopes and dreams affected by what has happened in the past few years. Today, I just heard about a couple who ran into an adverse business situation - the home is under the wife's name but her parents are also on it. So, here, are these poor elderly folks who are caught up in all this. So, it's sad.
My husband has several clients and quite a few of them last year were planning on retiring but have since reinvented themselves and seem quite happy at this point. Some of these people we only see once or twice a year (taxes) so it's nice hearing what is going on in their lives and that there is life after a setback.
I didn't for sure. I did a lot of research of all kinds. My first choice was Brazil, but I considered Uruguay, Costa Rica and Ireland and less so, Portugal.
Brazil did not pan out because of the sudden death of my cousin who lived there, and I did not feel equipped to live in as demanding a city a Rio without someone to lean on in the beginning. I rejected the others for various reasons. I made a trip to Portugal then, and did not feel overwhelmed. But upon return it seemed better and better, and I finally said, what the hell - yes, that's it.
This was 1999, the dollar was very high and the value of the Portuguese escudo was very low. Given my relatively small savings to work with the move would not be feasible now, even though my SS and pension were good, though not lavish.
The costs were storage for 40 cartons of possessions, very small fee for visa and residency application, over 200 for translating all documents into Portuguese, plane ticket...and at the last minute I decided to go the Madeira, a Portuguese maritime province off the coast of Africa, where I had never been before...but it looked pretty and warm. So, I rented an apartment on the internet - it cost half of what I had been paying in the U.S. and included gas and electric. Thus, all told the move was cheap.
At the end of six months I moved to the mainland, southwest coast of Portugal and I bought a small three-story house in a tiny dead end street with only one other residence and the back door of the small Red Cross bldg.
I didn't buy a car for awhile as the town was walkable, and when I got cabin fever I rented a budget car for lots of day trips.
A photo of that house is below, with magnificent sea views from the third floor balconies.
Beautiful! Thanks for sharing the pictures. I am always thrilled when things like this work out and have happy endings. You live in a beautiful place. I spent a lot of time on the Costa Blanco and it looks very similar.
Wow what a gorgeous place. I am green and purple with envy.
I wanted to move after a year, and I let an agent handle the sale. I thought the price was very high, especially as she was the same woman who had sold it to me at a lower price....but she got the price, and that was the beginning of being able to add to my nest egg.
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What about health insurance and medical care there?
Retired foreigners must have private insurance, if they come from non-EU countries. I have a British policy as at the time U.S. companies were charging very high premiums for expat insurance and not providing very good coverage....and reputedly were lousy about settling claims. My Brit policy has served me well.
There is a system of state hospitals here, as well as private ones. You can go to either one. The state systems charges much lower prices, but expects cash payment from those with private insurance.
State hospitals are more crowded, though they do not necessarily have a lower level of medical staff. Their nursing staff varies in quality though....actually the female nurses in state hospital are okay, but the males are too often inattentive and undisciplined.
The private hospital in my experience are excellent top to bottom. The one I use processes your claim while you are in the hospital directly with my company in the U.K.
I live in a somewhat provincial locale, though it is popular with tourists. This means that certain specialists only have a day or two a week (or even a month) for appointments because they come from bigger cities. However, it is a very small country and if you want quicker service you can always take a trip to where they have their office.
Costs are usually 25% less than in the U.S., sometimes even cheaper. Medicines are costly.
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Does the language present many barriers?
I live in an area where many people speak English because of the large number of British tourists and a resident expat community. However, I can navigate through the routines of daily life, the supermarket, pharmacy, cafe, directions, etc. in Portuguese. And I read a great deal more Portuguese than I speak. So, all in all I don't usually have any problems because of language.
I have far more diffculty understanding any British person who comes from more than 50 miles north of London than I do understanding the Portuguese. High Middle Neanderthal had simply never appeared on my radar screen before!
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) since she'd spent 16 years as a single mother raising two daughters with absolutely no support, whatsoever, from her ex - the girls' father. At that point we both started over.
You can start over....
