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to those younger than you (late 50s and 60s) following behind? On anything at all other than finances.......housing, relocation, relationships, roles, attitudes, habits...what has your aging taught you?
Great idea for a thread, NEG. I can only think of a few things and there are always exceptions.
I guess I'd say be true to yourself. Trust your own instincts. Don't let others influence you too much but at the same time be open minded.
Beware of office politics at work. Don't try to be neutral and stuck in the middle. Join one gang (and that's what they are) or the other because you may need their support when things get nasty.
That goes contrary to being true to yourself but it's an exception that you have to make to survive in the dog eat dog world.
Don't get married unless you are about 100% positive it will be forever. Divorce is expensive and painful. It takes a long time to recover both emotionally and financially. It should be a last resort because the grass is not always greener. Don't imagine that a divorce will solve your problems. BUT if you are married to an addict or an abuser get out ASAP.
I guess I'd say be true to yourself. Trust your own instincts. Don't let others influence you too much but at the same time be open minded.
The media sure has a hand in influencing us as seniors. To think for ourselves can be a challenge if we allow the media too much in our face.
Beware of office politics at work. Don't try to be neutral and stuck in the middle. Join one gang (and that's what they are) or the other because you may need their support when things get nasty.
This is an interesting statement! But by now, if retired we're out of the office politics. I certainly do not miss that aspect of work, and thank my lucky stars I don't have to deal with it anymore.
Don't get married unless you are about 100% positive it will be forever.
I think most couples feel, at the outset, that it will be forever. Some have an instinct that it may not work out or is a bad idea, but go through with it anyway. Years later the mistake surfaces and can be ruinous. Then I think about the marriages that take place in late life, and it seems like a joyful thing. Then the years for "forever" aren't so long!
Divorce is expensive and painful. It takes a long time to recover both emotionally and financially. It should be a last resort because the grass is not always greener. Don't imagine that a divorce will solve your problems. BUT if you are married to an addict or an abuser get out ASAP.
i think at 70 there is a sense of time beginning to run out, and a need to make those important decisions that the media tells us are necessary to make- housing, location/relocation,relationship changes with partner/spouse, children, travel opportunities that may be a last chance, etc.
i will be 72 this summer, am in generally good health, appear/seem younger, based on the comments of others, am in a longstanding ( 13 years) relationship, and have moderate income enough to have some options. oh, also i'm a worrier and a planner. i feel because today's seniors receive so much information on preparing for the future which may be much longer than previous generations, there is a tendency to have a white knuckle approach to planning , rather than giving some options time and space. also i see some seniors making decisions perhaps too soon that might have waited or, in some cases, not be made at all, if there were not the feeling of needing to "have everything finalized."
i certainly see the problems in waiting too long to make necessary changes, and i think that possibility, seen firsthand by many seniors in regard to their parents' aging experience, strikes fear into the hearts of many as they reach that seemingly great milestone of 70. i have certainly fallen into that category, in some regards, but in the last six months or so, have come to realize that i don't want to make any changes immediately. i have visited a number of ccrcs, and although that may be in my future, i don't see any that i want to be in now. i have never found 55+ communities especially appealing, and condos, at this point, might be a difficult transition. i have a moderate size townhouse, with a small yard, both of which i have help in maintaining, and the cost of which is not an overwhelming amount. i like my "things"- piano, grandfather's clock, old secretary, some antiques- and am not ready to seriously downsize.
so, this is where i am right now. i may have to make a change in the future, and hope i have the ability to see the necessity for change when i am still able to make it. but, i don't really want to make a change now as fortification against an unknown future. it doesn't feel right to me, and i tend to trust my intuitive feelings, in such matters. so, i'm here for now, perhaps indefinitely, but, at least for today, i'm tired of worrying about the future.
I like your message. It reflects calm, taking one's time with major decisions and not feeling pressured to make change just because one has gone past the milestone of age 70.
I see two polar trends—some seniors going into "senior" situations too early for their needs, wanting to settle things asap—or waiting too long to make a change and being in too negative a position in terms of health to implement it.
Seventies, once thought of as old, seems to be a vibrant decade for a lot of folks. When to make a critical change, if at all, is a big challenge many of us face.
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....housing, relocation, relationships, roles, attitudes, habits...what has your aging taught you?
