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If you would be moving alone, pay attention to what the sole-movers say. Moving alone and starting over in a strange place all on your own is very different from moving with someone. With a spouse or partner, you have help with the move, help once you get there, and built in companionship.
When you move to a new place on your own, you literally have no one to talk to in person....for anything. You are truly alone. Want to go to a movie? You have to go alone. Want to comment on something in the news? There is no one to comment to. Want to discuss anything at all, or catch lunch in a new cafe? You must do that alone or not at all. You....are.....totally.....alone. You are also disoriented in a new city. You don't know where anything is, or the best way to get there.
That will change in time, of course. If you join groups and such, you will meet people. You will gradually learn where everything is. You will become oriented to the new city. But that can take a while. If you haven't done that before, I worry how you would adjust. I've done it before several times. It's not for sissies and can send a person into depression. I would not recommend it unless there is a pressing need for it and you've done it before
Having said that, if I hadn't made such moves before, I wouldn't have been able to care for myself financially very well, since I hail from a bad economic area. I moved several times on my own. Once I was very young and became so lonely and deeply depressed that I moved back to my hometown. I wouldn't have that option this time (couldn't afford it). But the last time I did it, I stayed where I am now, and prospered and became very happy. All the moves helped me grow, become more independent and self sufficient, and become more extroverted. They were also very interesting....meeting new people, seeing new things, becoming aware of the world out there outside of my hometown.
Where we live has two large drawbacks. First, there's very little to do and finding something is a long drive. Second, the climate is terrible for my wife's allergies. So that's enough reason to move. Its fairly safe, there are jobs and the temperature is about the way we like it, but there's other places that have that also. Plus, we have no family ties to keep us here, so when I retire, we're gone.
I've read other posts that have questioned the wisdom of relocating. Has anyone relocated that is truly in love with their "new" home? Or very disappointed, regretting it? How have you resolved the negative move?
I don't know if I could be truly in love with a single locale, but that's just my make up. I loved FL for certain things and hated it for others. I wanted to kiss the ground when we moved back to New England. Now it's the same thing. I love being closer to family and I've made some good friends up here. I love the familiar foods, the sights and the attitudes that go with living near Boston. But I miss the Florida lifestyle, the easy banter between strangers, the balmy winters and more. I don't think there's any one place for me. Happy, for now, to be a snowbird!
1. The need to find a less expensive area
2. Desire for a better climate
3. Wish to have easier access to nature
The considering, weighing went on for at least a couple of years, and at the end of it I was not happy with my choices though on the surface they each seemed to fit the bill. During my research period, however, my uneasiness about the changes in U.S. political life and popular culture escalated to discomfort & apprehension. This meant that looking outside the U.S. made sense, so I started over with 1,2 & 3, but now a big #4 - what other country and culture did I think I could fit into?
my 60 year old sister bought a house in Nevada to use as her retirement home. She's been fixing it up after she kicked out her deadbeat tenant and has been traveling from NYC to Nevada at least once a month to take care of stuff.
She just rented out her studio apartment for $2500 per month and all her plans to relocate to a warmer/cheaper place are now in place. ie: steady income and a place to live.
I'm happy for her now that her retirement countdown has started. Her move was in the works for about 1.5 years.
bpollen: Thank you for your interesting, informative post. I feel you totally "get" my perspective.
I did make a move to TX in 1993 that turned into one of my biggest mistakes in life, but also a real learning curve, too.
I've always been so independent and carry the idea I can do "anything." And I pretty much have done what I wanted. Of course, I was younger. Had a better chance at finding a job I could do. Didn't feel much fear as I had known fear most of my life so nothing new with that.
Your point about doing it alone is a very good one, and I've been thinking about that for quite a while. While I tend to be more loner than social butterfly, I still crave social at times and have people here who I am comfortable with.
Just out of curiosity, where did you pick to retire?
Western Montana in a rather mild "micro climate" along the Clark Fork river.
We spent too far much on the house (by local standards), but custom designed it to our specific needs, and it is set up 100% wheel chair accessible if that becomes needed (it may, based on previous injuries and surgeries, but it is overkill today), and higher end (read no/less maintenance) construction. Eight hour drive from the kids, and some of the most gorgeous country on this earth - looks a lot like Heidelberg, GE, with a little Bavaria thrown in for good measure.
We're about 40 minutes from a decent sized city, have a small medical clinic 3 minutes from the house, and they have an aero-medevac program at the regional hospital.
I have a decent pension, but it's an area where you want to retire, as building a career there would have challenges and limits, and I do not think there will be any opportunities for senior part time work. However, COL is about 1/3 of our current costs here in HI, so it's a non-issue for us, but may be a consideration for others in terms of "good fit."
It sounds lovely! Hope you guys are very happy there.
bpollen: Thank you for your interesting, informative post. I feel you totally "get" my perspective.
I did make a move to TX in 1993 that turned into one of my biggest mistakes in life, but also a real learning curve, too.
I've always been so independent and carry the idea I can do "anything." And I pretty much have done what I wanted. Of course, I was younger. Had a better chance at finding a job I could do. Didn't feel much fear as I had known fear most of my life so nothing new with that.
Your point about doing it alone is a very good one, and I've been thinking about that for quite a while. While I tend to be more loner than social butterfly, I still crave social at times and have people here who I am comfortable with.
Just out of curiosity, where did you pick to retire?
I am moving to the mid-sized city of Tyler, TX. Not far from where I am (Dallas). It's not 100% what I wanted, but it's close. 2 - 4 degrees less hot, and though not far away, it crossed over into the Piney Woods of east Texas so the land and soil are totally different (loam and lots and lots of trees, and gently rolling landscape). It has everything I need (Macy's, Target, WalMart, Sam's, high end stores, discount stores, thrift stores, you name it). It will also snow there once a year most years (I was going to miss the occasional snow). The COL is measurably less....and Tyler has the lowest CITY property tax rate in the state (of mid or large cities). Medical care is abundant there....and costs significantly less. (My insurance policy will drop at least $100 month once I move.)
It's also close enough to Dallas that I can still go there for the day. It's not as close to family as I wanted, but it's closer.
It's the rose capital of the country, so gardening is big there. Azalea bushes everywhere, which reminds me of Louisiana. I plan on doing gardening as a hobby.
I keep second guessing myself, because I really like big city life. But I think Tyler is a good compromise and has as much as what I'm looking for as any place will. The houses in my price range are pretty good, too. When I went there, I immediately felt comfortable.
So Tyler it is. I'm not sure exactly how to work out the details. I'm selling my house. Do I sell first, then move and rent? Do I move and rent while trying to sell? I'm not sure.
It can be a problem fitting into a small city. But Tyler is mid-sized and has a LOT of retirees, incl quite a few from Dallas, like me. I have interests and will join a couple of groups. I'm also a bit of an extrovert, while being a bit of a loner. So I think I'll be able to make a few friends.
I am moving to the mid-sized city of Tyler, TX. Not far from where I am (Dallas). It's not 100% what I wanted, but it's close. 2 - 4 degrees less hot, and though not far away, it crossed over into the Piney Woods of east Texas so the land and soil are totally different (loam and lots and lots of trees, and gently rolling landscape). It has everything I need (Macy's, Target, WalMart, Sam's, high end stores, discount stores, thrift stores, you name it). It will also snow there once a year most years (I was going to miss the occasional snow). The COL is measurably less....and Tyler has the lowest CITY property tax rate in the state (of mid or large cities). Medical care is abundant there....and costs significantly less. (My insurance policy will drop at least $100 month once I move.)
It's also close enough to Dallas that I can still go there for the day. It's not as close to family as I wanted, but it's closer.
It's the rose capital of the country, so gardening is big there. Azalea bushes everywhere, which reminds me of Louisiana. I plan on doing gardening as a hobby.
I keep second guessing myself, because I really like big city life. But I think Tyler is a good compromise and has as much as what I'm looking for as any place will. The houses in my price range are pretty good, too. When I went there, I immediately felt comfortable.
So Tyler it is. I'm not sure exactly how to work out the details. I'm selling my house. Do I sell first, then move and rent? Do I move and rent while trying to sell? I'm not sure.
It can be a problem fitting into a small city. But Tyler is mid-sized and has a LOT of retirees, incl quite a few from Dallas, like me. I have interests and will join a couple of groups. I'm also a bit of an extrovert, while being a bit of a loner. So I think I'll be able to make a few friends.
I moved to Tyler, TX in 1993. What a coincidence! I returned to central NY after 13 months. Long story.
I moved to Tyler, TX in 1993. What a coincidence! I returned to central NY after 13 months. Long story.
Why did you move back? Was Tyler too much of a cultural change for you? Too hot? Too closed off?
I've been following the Tyler forum here, so I think I have a handle on what it's like. I think.
I'd like to move north, actually, but that's further from family, too expensive for me to make multiple trips just to check out, and most places north are more expensive, not less (although some in the east are lower...TN, SC, GA).
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