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I mentioned it to my wife and she ripped me a new one. I saw some cute babies in church this morning and I just got to thinking about it. Then I happened upon a life expectancy calendar from some insurance company and I found that they think I have a good chance to live to 87 or 90. Wow, almost 20 more years? I planted a garden this year, but, that is just not enough. Lord help me!
And you could be dead in a week.
If you want to help with kids just go to your church and help with the classes there. While it's a grand gesture I think it's really going to hurt you in the long run. You could possibly have future medical conditions that may/ will hamper your ability to care of a baby/child.
I mentioned it to my wife and she ripped me a new one. I saw some cute babies in church this morning and I just got to thinking about it. Then I happened upon a life expectancy calendar from some insurance company and I found that they think I have a good chance to live to 87 or 90. Wow, almost 20 more years? I planted a garden this year, but, that is just not enough. Lord help me!
If you'ii excuse me for saying this,you are nuts!
I have a friend who addopted kids in his lat 60. His grandchildren were older. He can't keep up with them and now worries when he and his wife die, who will take care of these kids
Seriously, consider volunteering at your local elementary school or preschool. Be the Storytelling Man, or teach art, or music, or whatever talents you have to share. Be a playground monitor. Teach chess to the ten-and-ups. Tutor.
Or volunteer at a local museum or historic home that is visited by lots of classes, and work with kids that way.
You are at the stage of life in which you can best be a mentor, not a parent to a newborn. Share the wisdom and experience of your years, and don't waste your energies trying to parent a child under the age of twelve.
If you want to adopt an older child, though, give it serious thought. If you're hung up on the little ones - consider how early the staggering loss of a parent would be statistically likely to impact them. Then ask yourself if it would be selfish, or in the child's best interests for you to adopt them now.
That ship has sailed; that bird has flown. Done flew the coop.
I'm going to make a totally different suggestion. From what I read, it appears you have a need to nurture.
How about finding some outreach program for shut-ins? You'd visit a few times a week and you could make an enormous difference in someone's life. It's not just the elderly....there are people of all ages and circumstances who are hungry for human companionship. Who need to know that to at least one person, they matter.
I suffered a brain injury 3.5 years ago and was stuck in bed, with an eye mask and earplugs and ongoing migraines for over three years. 2 months ago I finally got insurance approval for Botox injections from my neurologist for my migraines and it changed my life. Until I was diagnosed with breast cancer a week after the injections and had to go through surgery, etc. So here I am, hooked up to a wound vac with limited mobility for 6 more weeks. But, hey, no more headaches! And the cancer is cured. I'll take it!
But I'm one of the lucky ones. My beloved husband is retired and I have friends and family. But I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have someone to just sit with me and chat.
When I'm completely recovered, I will be visiting shut-ins. I got a peek into that lonely world and to have no one would be a bitter, bitter thing.
Great suggestions - out of rep for the next 24, but sending my admiration and best wishes. You are a wise and compassionate lady (brave, too!).
Ask a relative who has a young baby to bring it over to your house and let you "borrow" it for a few hours, taking complete care of its needs. Then ask yourself if that is what you want to do all day, every day.
And all night, every night.
You want the baby, the care should all be on you, not your wife. Are you ready for 24/7 childcare?
Do you have the savings to support a child for the next 22 years (got to include college here) as well as your self and your wife? What if dementia hits one of you? Is the other prepared to run after a toddler while also providing full time care for your spouse?
Look into volunteer opportunities. Some hospitals have volunteer cuddler programs for opioid addicted newborns. Foster grandparents is another option. There has to be something you can do part time to help babies that doesn't involve turning your lives upside down.
Just seeing a cute baby doesn't mean you should go out and get one. But if you really wanted one, just be sure you are the one to get up with the 3 am feedings, do diaper duty, bath it, take it to the doctor for checkups and go to the school when the office calls.
You may want the baby but how are you with the responsibilities of taking care of it? Leave your wife out of it since she already seems to have voiced her opinion on the subject.
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