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To me, "elderly" is someone who is noticeably impaired by age. It could be dementia issues. It could be mobility issues. You are unable to do things you could do as a middle aged adult. For some people, that happens in their late-50's. For some people, they're not age-impaired at 85. Most people are somewhere between those to ends of the spectrum. It depends on genetics and lifetime behavior.
I also use the term to mean someone who is visibly impaired by age. Not just bad knees from a life of activity. It's one of those things that I know when I see it, like... well, you know. lol
It's different for different people. I wouldn't call the 73 year old lady I play pickup hockey with elderly, even with her hip replacement. But it did apply to my mom at that age, with her COPD and stroke and arthritis that left her physically delicate.
A neighbor is only 10 years older than me but I see her as being very elderly. I don't think I am even close to being elderly though. Maybe it's shallow, but in my mind, it has a lot to do with keeping yourself up.
She put on a lot of weight, let her hair go gray and adopted the old lady hairstyle, quit wearing makeup and has old fashioned views on life. Part of that is probably her fundamentalist religion, but when she expresses views (especially about women) that were prevalent in the early 1900's I automatically change my view of her to someone who is significantly older than me. Add to that my shallowness about letting herself go, and my perception is that she's 30 years older than me until I catch myself and remember her real age.
Elderly is when you feel a need to define what elderly is.
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All those people living in my senior citizens apartment complex. And me.
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