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I prefer to be single, It allows me to live outside the city in rural areas, I've been a trail runner most my life and now a mountain biker, I like horses and dogs and gardening, I live on 2ac and its all my mine... Why screw it all up ?
It's not necessarily that one gets a roommate who on many or some levels is not satisfactory personality-wise, with objectionable behavior, habits, beliefs or ethics, it's that one has to share one's living space with another human every second of every day or the majority of the time, forfeiting all privacy, all being alone with oneself, doing everything every day without being observed, having a presence of another human impinging on everything, often times sharing a kitchen and a living room, forfeiting quiet and peace, and just being one's own person.
No way could I tolerate it, especially with a stranger. But others as described above do not mind having another person in their space and do not feel impinged upon.
I agree with all you've said, believe it or not. I truly do value my peace, quiet, privacy and non stressful life. This is why I tried to find someone as similar as possible. If it gets to a point where I feel they are 'getting on my nerves' it's time for communication and I have no problem with that. When my daughter, and then her best friend, were with me it was just about perfect. They both work overnight shifts so slept from about noon till 8 PM. I was still, pretty much, "alone" all day. And I'm so quiet I didn't disturb them either. When they weren't sleeping they spent most of their time in their own rooms watching TV or whatever. I think, once she gets settled in, it will be okay. At first it's always a bit chaotic and I expect that. Like me, she spends a lot of time on her computer and she's a writer so stays busy with that. She also sings opera, and gave me an example. Yikes! lol She can sing all she wants as long as I'm not here! She also taught music for years. We'll see where this goes but I'm not anticipating any big problems.
Oh we don’t live together. Didn’t mean to imply that. He has his house. I have my house. So he does maintenance on his house - but he hates doing it- , and I do what is needed at my house. I was just saying that it’s normal for me to take care of whatever maintenance is needed at my home. Been doing it for nearly all my adult life.
But in answer to your question...he doesn’t cook - and he does his own grocery shopping.
Way back, when I was still somewhat interested in a 'relationship', I broached this very thing with the men I dated. Not one of them was interested in that type of arrangement. It was either all or nothing. So I decided that "nothing" was just fine with me.
The once a week was for "playtime" but she was getting me involved in her life like with her kids, which I did not want. Ended up I was seeing her 2-4 times a week and that was to much.
She texted me and asked if there was any way we could get back together. I replied that while I missed her, it would not work for me.
She texted me and asked if there was any way we could get back together. I replied that while I missed her, it would not work for me.
I feel bad but it is what it is.
Time will help both of you. It's hard to give up something you've had for a while. But in the long run, you know in your heart it's best for you. Can't be responsible for what she feels or asks for.Hang in there. It will get better. I've BTDT a couple of times.
Today my new neighbor (young) looked at me with great sympathy as I was raking the leaves. I had my music on my Bose going, the sun was shining and I was getting exercise - not bad. I looked at her with the same sympathy - I don't think she & her husband are getting along well these days plus her 2 kids are driving her mad. Wouldn't change places with her but she really can't imagine that. Maybe one day she will.
Way back, when I was still somewhat interested in a 'relationship', I broached this very thing with the men I dated. Not one of them was interested in that type of arrangement. It was either all or nothing. So I decided that "nothing" was just fine with me.
I really have come to believe that men are much needier creatures than women. Men want to believe otherwise, but I see no evidence of that.
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