Private All Boys Elementary Schools in the Seattle Area? (Edmonds: daycare, school district)

[VeronikaW]

My son is only 2, but I'm already foreseeing him having a very difficult time in school (he's, shall we say, spirited). I've heard that all boys schools are a good answer, and I'm just wondering if anyone knows of any in the Seattle area.

Thanks! And happy New Year!

V. =)

[Ira500]

I don't think there are any boys only elementary schools in these parts. O'Dea is a Catholic, boys only high school in Seattle...There are plenty of good private schools all over the Seattle area, and plenty of good public schools all over the Seattle area. I'm sure there are a lot of opinions on what kind of school would work best for a spirited boy. Off the top of my head, I'd think one with smaller class sizes and more individual attention, but what do I know?

[VeronikaW]

Thanks, Ira. I'm so worried about what's going to happen when we have to put Ian in school. I guess preschool next year will give us some idea.

[jenlion]

Veronika, I have a lot of friends eastside with "spirited" boys. My pediatrician told me to go get a book "The Spirited Child" (I think it was) at my son's ONE year appointment. It's pretty common.

I have a friend with a six-year-old. When he was four he was as tall as the 7-year-olds. He's on the spectrum (certainly) and got kicked out of at least three preschools. The parents are learning and doing everything they possibly can, in every therapy/intervention type program they can get into, and it's doing really positive things. He's very intelligent, just learning how to relate better. I've seen him improve quite a bit in the last year, and he's doing well in regular school now.

My son's daycare class has six kids. One is quite a bit more active than the others, can't sit, always has to touch, hug. Keeps grabbing my boobs (now I just make sure they're out of his reach at all times). Teachers don't even bat an eye anymore. They say a lot of the kids go through phases where they're totally wild like that and they wind up fine. Kid isn't hurting anybody, and in the past couple months I've seen them really explain to him exactly what he's supposed to be doing (time to sit and eat, time to color, time to play outside) and expect him to do it. He gets more sit-on-lap time than maybe he "deserves", but he needs it and they give it, and he's doing really well there.

I think the only problem you'd really run into is violence. There's just SO many geeky, educated couples around here. When you get a lot of those, you wind up with more kids on the spectrum. Dunno why. But people understand it. So long as your son isn't deliberately hitting, kicking, and biting other kids when he's 3 and 4, there will be a niche. If you think he's quite different, you can get him evaluated and the county offers a lot of occupational therapy type services to intervene early enough that they can get along in public school fine. I've seen it working for my friends' kids. The earlier you start, the better. But if he just doesn't want to sit still and color, has more energy than the rest of you and his friends put together, can't stop jumping, singing, yelling? It'll probably work out.

My friends with the wildest preschool-aged kids just make playdates only with each other. That way, both moms understand when the other kid acts out toward their own kid. Spares a lot of hurt feelings and irritation.

Hope everything settles out for you. This taking-care-of-kids business is not for wimps.

[VeronikaW]

Originally Posted by jenlion

Veronika, I have a lot of friends eastside with "spirited" boys. My pediatrician told me to go get a book "The Spirited Child" (I think it was) at my son's ONE year appointment. It's pretty common.

I have a friend with a six-year-old. When he was four he was as tall as the 7-year-olds. He's on the spectrum (certainly) and got kicked out of at least three preschools. The parents are learning and doing everything they possibly can, in every therapy/intervention type program they can get into, and it's doing really positive things. He's very intelligent, just learning how to relate better. I've seen him improve quite a bit in the last year, and he's doing well in regular school now.

My son's daycare class has six kids. One is quite a bit more active than the others, can't sit, always has to touch, hug. Keeps grabbing my boobs (now I just make sure they're out of his reach at all times). Teachers don't even bat an eye anymore. They say a lot of the kids go through phases where they're totally wild like that and they wind up fine. Kid isn't hurting anybody, and in the past couple months I've seen them really explain to him exactly what he's supposed to be doing (time to sit and eat, time to color, time to play outside) and expect him to do it. He gets more sit-on-lap time than maybe he "deserves", but he needs it and they give it, and he's doing really well there.

I think the only problem you'd really run into is violence. There's just SO many geeky, educated couples around here. When you get a lot of those, you wind up with more kids on the spectrum. Dunno why. But people understand it. So long as your son isn't deliberately hitting, kicking, and biting other kids when he's 3 and 4, there will be a niche. If you think he's quite different, you can get him evaluated and the county offers a lot of occupational therapy type services to intervene early enough that they can get along in public school fine. I've seen it working for my friends' kids. The earlier you start, the better. But if he just doesn't want to sit still and color, has more energy than the rest of you and his friends put together, can't stop jumping, singing, yelling? It'll probably work out.

My friends with the wildest preschool-aged kids just make playdates only with each other. That way, both moms understand when the other kid acts out toward their own kid. Spares a lot of hurt feelings and irritation.

Hope everything settles out for you. This taking-care-of-kids business is not for wimps.

Thanks, Jen! My son is actually already getting some services from the Birth to 3 program. He's in speech therapy because he's had a bit of a delay, and every Monday he gets to go to a playgroup, that sort of simulates preschool (but I'm there with him). In 6 months I'll meet with a representative from the school district, and they'll do testing to see if he'll qualify for the special needs preschool.

I think part of the problem is that I also have a 1 year old, so my son is very very jealous. He's only violent toward her (he likes to hit her, no biting thank goodness), but he seems to play well with the other kids. He just doesn't have an attention span.

I guess we'll see what happens.

V. =)

[evergreentori]

Hi Veronika -

I too have a very "spirited" boy. I have been looking into multi-age programs for him. They are usually more flexible and there is a lot of hands-on learning in those classrooms (some may say it is chaotic, but it just isn't the standard rote learning you see in a lot of classrooms). Edmonds SD has a school called Madrona, Lake Washington has three K-6 multi-age schools, and Bainbridge Island and North Kitsap also have multi-age programs. I am sure other schools have these programs too, but not all districts do.

Also, I just read a book called "Nurture Shock" and it had a really good chapter on sibling rivalry.

Good luck!

[VeronikaW]

Originally Posted by evergreentori

Hi Veronika -

I too have a very "spirited" boy. I have been looking into multi-age programs for him. They are usually more flexible and there is a lot of hands-on learning in those classrooms (some may say it is chaotic, but it just isn't the standard rote learning you see in a lot of classrooms). Edmonds SD has a school called Madrona, Lake Washington has three K-6 multi-age schools, and Bainbridge Island and North Kitsap also have multi-age programs. I am sure other schools have these programs too, but not all districts do.

Also, I just read a book called "Nurture Shock" and it had a really good chapter on sibling rivalry.

Good luck!

Thank you for the info! That is something I will have to look into!

[erinmahan]

Really great books to understand the nature of our boys and the issues taht surround them have been Gurians The Minds of Boys and the book Real Boys which comes with a workbook parents and teachers a like would benefit from. Most of our boys are entirely normal in their boy pace of learning and their needs. Its the schools and society taht do not see this and the self esteem goes down as soon as they enter kindergarten!! We need to stick up for boys needs as we have for girls. We need more elementary teachers who are male, more awareness of gender based education, gender stereo-typing, more hands-on learning, more mentorship, more boys only support groups and classes, (not the opportunity to only bond outside the principles office or other detentions), less expectation of holding still and giving them the room to wiggle and stand while learning. This is all normal. Our expectations and ways of teaching and reaching out to boys needs to change! These books have helped me understand this and speak out for boys starting with preschool!