TN culture questions (Memphis, Knoxville, Bartlett: fit in, transplants, new home)

[lavender_blue]

Would love to hear from native Tennesseans on if/how TN culture has changed since the influx of people from all over flocking to what is mostly a red state. Maybe it hasn't really changed at all, but I suspect there are some changes.

I'm also wondering about how my family will fit into TN - will it be easier with this new influx of people? Harder? A big reason why we're considering as our new home is because it's a conservative state that will most likely stay conservative for some time to come. We are Christian, but we don't go to church. For various reasons, we don't really feel like joining a church is something we'd want to do. Religion is a private thing for us, for the most part. Can you assimilate well in TN if you don't join a church? At this point, having moved all over the US (and my husband is not American, to boot), we are sort of outliers wherever we go. I am hoping we'll find like-minded (i.e., conservative) people in whatever community we end up in, at the very least though.

[Serious Conversation]

The larger cities and college towns tend to have more transplants, more diversity, and things to do outside of church. Smaller towns and rural areas are often populated by generations long natives and church tends to be more of a center of the social life.

You can usually find some amount of like-minded people wherever, but it's definitely easier to meet people as a nonlocal where there are more transplants because social circles tend to be less closed.

[AppalachianAngler]

If you are conservative but not a church person you are going to be better off in a blue collar suburb of a bigger city (like Bartlett for Memphis).

It would be hard, socially, to not go to church in a small town, but I think that would be the case for any small town regardless of the church factor if you don't have any ties.

[trobesmom]

Originally Posted by lavender_blue

Would love to hear from native Tennesseans on if/how TN culture has changed since the influx of people from all over flocking to what is mostly a red state. Maybe it hasn't really changed at all, but I suspect there are some changes.

I'm also wondering about how my family will fit into TN - will it be easier with this new influx of people? Harder? A big reason why we're considering as our new home is because it's a conservative state that will most likely stay conservative for some time to come. We are Christian, but we don't go to church. For various reasons, we don't really feel like joining a church is something we'd want to do. Religion is a private thing for us, for the most part. Can you assimilate well in TN if you don't join a church? At this point, having moved all over the US (and my husband is not American, to boot), we are sort of outliers wherever we go. I am hoping we'll find like-minded (i.e., conservative) people in whatever community we end up in, at the very least though.

You will have no trouble finding conservative people within the entire state of TN. I think the larger cities have more liberal people, though they are not the majority even there by a long shot.

Not sure what the church situation is though. I'm a liberal living in a very small red county in TN. The subject of church attendance has never come up.

[Barking Spider]

Im not a native, I've only lived here for 26 years. I manage to live here in a red state without really anyone knowing just how purple I might be. Politics just does not come up in my circle of friends or neighbors.
I have a neighbor (for 26 years - also a transplant) that is pretty far right, but we manage to have meals and beers together without the conversations getting around to our political views. He knows I am not nearly as read as he is, but apparently does not hold it against me.

While the church thing might have been a big thing years ago, and may still be a thing in the smaller rural communities, I think its kind of a stereotype that just refuses to go away. I have not been asked anything about a church, my religion, etc, for a decade or two. And even when I moved to Knoxville from CA in 1994, it didn't come up all that much even then.

When I was a home inspector I met people from all over the country, and locals moving within the area on a daily basis. Thats 2 inspections a day, almost every working day. I inspected over 11,000 homes in my career, maybe 9000 in Knoxville. When the clients attend the inspection, we spent from 1 - 4 hours together.
I will say that very rarely did religion come up during the inspection, and I have a hard time recalling if politics came up ONCE.

Keep in mind, that during an inspection I may have 2 or more clients there, possibly the seller of the house was there, and usually a Realtor was present as well. I had engagement with several people every day, for a fair amount of time. Politics and religion were hardly ever discussed.

Granted, in Knoxville we have the University and we also have the Oak Ridge National Lab. Both of those places are very diverse, with people from all over the world.

If you mind your own business, and not try to force your beliefs on someone else, you will likely be fine.
One hint to getting along. Don't start a sentence with: "Back in (fill in the blank) we did/had/thought this", or "Why don't they do it like they do in (fill in the blank)?".

[lavender_blue]

Thanks, Barking Spider. Appreciate your input. While I think it's unlikely that politics and religion would come up during home inspections, it still interesting to hear your experience.

I'm not really one to force my views on others. I'm just hoping we'll find like-minded people in TN. It seems from what I've read here and elsewhere that I will.

I don't mind being an outlier, I've kind of gotten used to it and being that I'm an artist, it's kind of my preference anyway, some days

Thanks to everyone else, too, for your input. I appreciate the feedback. I'm sure TN is like anywhere else, all kinds of people. But probably more that are like us than where we are now.

[VinceTheExplorer]

We’re not religious at all and have found native folks here in TN to be warm and accepting. It may be that we’re a family oriented couple (mid 40’s with 3 kids, together 30+ years since middle school) and that we pretty much stay off the radar.

I truly believe that if you move to an area and want to fit in you will, but if you bring attention to yourself you will too - most likely the unwanted kind.

A poster said it best awhile back in regards to moving here. “You fit in because you’re a good fit” which I believe is the best advice for anyone considering moving to TN. Good luck!

[Geneyus]

No one will look down on you for not going to church. You might notice more religious talk in TN than other states, but it's just the culture. I didn't notice it until a Liberal/atheist friend pointed it out that people kept asking what church she attended (to see if they have mutual friends), saying "God Bless", etc. It wasn't judgmental or evangelizing, but she found it annoying. I'm not sure what she expected moving to TN.

I have people asking me where I go to church every once in a while, and when I mention where I've gone in the past, it's usually followed by "Did you know this family?". It's just conversation around here, like asking where you work.

[Hazel Greener]

I live right on the border of TN, and I've never experienced any problems with people being judgemental about a person's religion or lack thereof.

We haven't attended many church services in the 30 years we've lived here, but my child attended a Church of Christ pre-school, and we have helped with fundraisers and charity work with the local Methodist church. I attended church regularly when I was younger, but my wife had never attended any church.

A lot of people who are committed churchgoers consider the church as being a part of an involved community and working together to help others.

Pretty nice...

[Barking Spider]

Originally Posted by lavender_blue

Thanks, Barking Spider. Appreciate your input. While I think it's unlikely that politics and religion would come up during home inspections, it still interesting to hear your experience.

I'm not really one to force my views on others. I'm just hoping we'll find like-minded people in TN. It seems from what I've read here and elsewhere that I will.

I don't mind being an outlier, I've kind of gotten used to it and being that I'm an artist, it's kind of my preference anyway, some days

Thanks to everyone else, too, for your input. I appreciate the feedback. I'm sure TN is like anywhere else, all kinds of people. But probably more that are like us than where we are now.

You would be very surprised what conversations did come up during inspections. Almost always I would ask what brought them to this area, and that brought out a lot of interesting conversations. Politics often came up during election years, and especially around October / November.

I'm interested how you are going to go about finding like minded people when you move here, unless you just seek out people that are posting campaign signs of your approved candidate. Or you bring up politics and religion when you strike up conversations. I'm saying that because it comes up so rarely in my experience. Honestly, when someone brings up politics, or a controversial topic such as abortion / capital punishment / immigration / guns, etc, I rarely will engage that topic, and probably shy away from them. But thats just me.

Just the other day as I was driving home from Trader Joes, I passed a home with 5 or 6 Trump signs in front, and right next door, they had a couple Biden signs. Yet I saw no other signs in that neighborhood (on the street I was driving on). So, I guess if you lived in that neighborhood, you could pick one of them to introduce yourself to and would have a kindred spirt.

Like I said before, at least in my area, people just don't try to shove their beliefs down someone else's throat, and I could give a flip how they vote or feel about politics or church. If they are nice people, we get along, and do things for each other.

I hope you find what you are looking for.