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What a bunch of *******s. As someone who DID send thank-you notes after her wedding, your begrudgery for not receiving a pat on the back is disgusting. You're offering a gift in celebration of someone's marriage. They invited you and spent money on you, too, so stop being petty and dramatic and GET OVER IT. So immature. In my experience, the kinds of people who gripe about not getting thanked well enough for the gifts they give are giving them for the wrong reasons.
It's a wedding. It's not about the frickin' gifts. You don't seem to care at all that these people sought to include you in one of the most celebratory days of their lives, which makes YOU the ingrate.
So now it's "immature" to expect decent behavior? Okay then.
Perhaps we should just stop giving gifts, since it's such a burden to the poor couple to write "Thank You".
BTW, guests don't only spend on gifts. They also spend on clothing and travel expenses, and possibly even multiple gifts or expenses if they are also invited to showers or bachelor/bachelorette parties. Those invitations don't come without expenses attached for the guests.
Also, there is absolutely NOTHING in etiquette that requires any guest to actually give a wedding gift. So acting like you're entitled and don't need to say "Thank You" because the invitation is doing your guests a favor makes YOU the ingrate.
It does bother me when I've given wedding gifts and not gotten a thank you. It makes me think that the couple must feel entitled and very self centered.
Last edited by MissTerri; 06-05-2016 at 04:20 PM..
It does bother me when I've given wedding gifts and not gotten a thank you. It makes me think that the couple must feel entitled and very self centered.
Agreed. We wrote and sent our thank-you notes as soon as we got back from our honeymoon. We didn't get many gifts and didn't get anything pricey, but it was a second wedding for both of us and we did not register anywhere....nor did we ask for gifts. Some people simply gave them to us anyway.
When my baby sister got married, she swore up and down that she read somewhere (in an etiquette book or bridal magazine) that the newlywed couple has a year to send thank-you notes.
I'd dismiss it as my little sister being flaky, but I heard the same thing from a casual friend, which makes me wonder if there's some etiquette book that made a typo.
Opps I have used the One year rule myself. I read that online as well that Thank You note must go out no later than one year. So when my anniversary came around, I was scrambling to finish writing my thank you note. I only send few hand written note, I quickly switched over to email/facebook thank you message with link to my wedding video & photo
Opps I have used the One year rule myself. I read that online as well that Thank You note must go out no later than one year. So when my anniversary came around, I was scrambling to finish writing my thank you note. I only send few hand written note, I quickly switched over to email/facebook thank you message with link to my wedding video & photo
That is from back in the day when the rich would take a honeymoon trip to Europe and be gone for months. It doesn't apply today.
Email and Facebook was wrong. Very low class. Every thank you should have been hand written.
Opps I have used the One year rule myself. I read that online as well that Thank You note must go out no later than one year. So when my anniversary came around, I was scrambling to finish writing my thank you note. I only send few hand written note, I quickly switched over to email/facebook thank you message with link to my wedding video & photo
While I am glad that you send out thank you notes, or at least sent an email the "one year rule" only really applies if you were on your honeymoon for all, or at least most, of that time. Frankly, I doubt if that many people have either the money or the vacation time from their job to go on a year long honeymoon.
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626
I believe that the "one year rule" is from a long time ago (perhaps the 1880s to 1920s) when very, very wealthy couples used to go on extremely long honeymoons, perhaps, six months, or nine months or even a year traveling all around Europe and perhaps also traveling to India or Australia before they returned home. Since they usually left right after the wedding of course it would take a while to finish and send out the Thank You notes.
When was the last time you heard of newly married couple taking a six month, nine month or a year long honeymoon?
And, these honeymooners needed to travel by horses & carriages or trains or slow moving ships in the early days and, if they were lucky, by fairly slow (by today's standards) cars in the later years to get from place to place. Today, with airplanes able to quickly travel to other continents, it is a totally different situation.
Opps I have used the One year rule myself. I read that online as well that Thank You note must go out no later than one year. So when my anniversary came around, I was scrambling to finish writing my thank you note. I only send few hand written note, I quickly switched over to email/facebook thank you message with link to my wedding video & photo
Wow.
That'd be the last time you got anything from me other than a handshake.
Opps I have used the One year rule myself. I read that online as well that Thank You note must go out no later than one year. So when my anniversary came around, I was scrambling to finish writing my thank you note. I only send few hand written note, I quickly switched over to email/facebook thank you message with link to my wedding video & photo
YIKES.
I wrote thank you notes as I received gifts. Everyone had a card in their hands within 2 weeks. We had 100+ guests and I work full time. If I had to, I would turn a movie on and crank them out.
I can't imagine sending a thank you a year later.
You must have looked at a heck of an etiquette site. The facebook message and wedding video makes me cringe .
But anyway, I can't imagine NOT writing thank you's, and promptly at that. People spent hundreds, and many thousands to come see us. Inconveniencing myself/staying up late to write a few thank you notes with personal messages was an easy choice.
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We didn't get many gifts and didn't get anything pricey, but it was a second wedding for both of us and we did not register anywhere....nor did we ask for gifts. Some people simply gave them to us anyway. 
.
