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1. Church out in the middle of nowhere. I mean really out in the sticks.
2. The wedding was over two hours late beginning because the bride had not shown up and no one was concerned because evidently she could not get anywhere one time.
3. A rather large segment of the guest looked like "Hell's Angel's" and would not sit in the actual sanctuary of the church, instead sat in the very back in a area designated as a classroom with a folding curtain. Acted as if they thought the roof was going to collapse on them.
4. I was the wedding coordinator and as I was lining up the bridesmaids I thought how lovely they look with beautiful gowns with a sweetheart neckline and a deep open back. Then as the maid of honor started down the isle, I saw her back all covered with tat's of snakes.
5. The flower girl laid in the floor and passed gas during the vows.
6. The reception was held at the local honky tonk and the mother of the bride was already drunk before the pictures were finished.
7. They served bar-be-que and baked beans and beer.
As I said not necessarily bad, but certainly strange.
The worst one was held in this huge church. I mean humongous. And the bride was small.
They decided to have a unity candle thing, but it was on the right side of the alter, and it felt like it took 15 minutes for this tiny woman in a 200 pound dress and a veil that would cover the Titanic to haul herself over to it. Then there was some sort of flower ceremony for the dead parents way on the other side of the church, so way more walking..then there was this thing where the maids and ushers were the ones giving them away...and they had to physically hold the brides and grooms hands and hand off....
It was all very sincerely planned and you could tell it had great meaning to the couple...and i even teared up a little because it was very sweet...but in a smaller church it would have felt more intimate, and more cohesive...
The only other thing that happened at another wedding was some people dressed up as wait staff, and made off with the wedding gifts...
This reminds me of another one. This one was for a coworker. They had decided to do the unity candle, too. So they were over there doing that, and I think it was already sort of awkward because they couldn't get them to light, but then all of a sudden there was this LOUD noise that burst out that sounded like a gunshot. Seriously, it shocked us; we all jumped and were about ready to hit the decks, and then finally we see the priest grimacing and holding his throat. He had coughed directly into the microphone. It looked like the bride and groom were trying to suppress laughter there as they continued to try to light the candles.
They were videotaping the ceremony, and I just imagine what all of our faces must have looked like if we were in it.
I did over a dozen weddings when I was a pastor. Following the suggested ceremony in the 'Minister's Manual', the entire ceremony can be completed in less than 7 minutes. [I timed it once] So you really need to add things to give it body.
The best weddings I have performed or attended were generally the simple low-budget ones. [less things can go wrong]
I am not a big fan of self-written vows.
I like when the bride's maids dresses are NOT one-use-only dresses.
If the girls have tats the gowns need to be customized in some manner. Either customize the gowns to show-off all tats [otherwise why did you get the tats?], or use the gowns to cover over the tats. Tats that play peek-a-boo are a distraction.
Focus effort on the photos. Someone will mess up some part, it happens. 30 years later what you will have from the wedding will be the photos. Get a good photographer, make sure that every relative is included. [remember aunt so-so I thought she attended our wedding but there are no photos of her]
City parks are good places for wedding, lake fronts, water falls, forest meadows, there are lots of places that make great photos, and yet you can use them for free.
Themed weddings are fun.
Keep the bride, groom, best-man and maid-of-honor all sober until after the reception. If any one of these people gets slobbering falling-down drunk during the ceremony it gets ugly.
You really NEED one person designated as coordinator, to keep things rolling.
I did over a dozen weddings when I was a pastor. Following the suggested ceremony in the 'Minister's Manual', the entire ceremony can be completed in less than 7 minutes. [I timed it once] So you really need to add things to give it body.
My son attended a wedding with the Sand Ceremony. The bride & the groom are supposed to slowly, slowly pour two different colors of sand into a tall glass jar (and then saved and put on display). It shows the two families mixing from two colors into one different color.
Well, my son's friend was a jokester and was going to pretend to dump the sand in very fast as joke. Oops! Instead of pretending to dump the sand he accidently DID dump the sand very quickly. So the new husband dumped 3/4 of his sand in before his bride even started to pour her sands. She was livid, but what could she do? It was extremely noticeable from where the wedding guests were sitting.
BTW, the groom was too much of a jokester. They divorced a few years later.
If the girls have tats the gowns need to be customized in some manner. Either customize the gowns to show-off all tats [otherwise why did you get the tats?], or use the gowns to cover over the tats. Tats that play peek-a-boo are a distraction.
I remember going to a wedding rehearsal at a church located in a suburban neighborhood. The house next door was occupied by someone who either bred & sold beagles, or just had a lot of beagles.
Anyway, part of the ceremony was that one of the bridesmaids would sing "You Light Up My Life". She went up to the microphone, introduced herself and started singing.
Then all the beagles in the adjoining yard decided to join in.
Me (along with most of the attendees) had to sit there red-faced and choking back laughter & tears while she struggled bravely to the finish.
When the actual wedding took place a month later the church windows were closed tight, and I believe the neighbors were paid to keep all their dogs inside for the duration.
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
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Many years ago I went to the wedding of a family friend I hadn't seen in a few years, and the wedding was not too bad, but at the reception, all we got to drink was a half of one of those little 8 oz. Coors cans, poured into a Dixie cup. No seconds.
Well, the one I went to, the bride's brother has been fighting drug and alcohol problems for years, has gotten himself into real trouble, and has abused their trust many times, so, understandably, she feels pretty strongly about it. But, I have to admit, she is very hard to get along with and stops speaking to her other family members on a regular basis. lol
At those times you get a sitter for the brother. At the first sign of trouble you remove them from the building by whatever means necessary. You tell them from the start what "by whatever means necessary" means.
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What is the worst wedding you have ever been to?
