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If you are going into management you need to play the game or they will find someone else who can. Success in higher level jobs is based on working with all kinds of people with varied agendas. If you can't get their assistance and respect they will find someone else who does. Suck it up. Very few jobs are for people who work without interaction now days.
If you are going into management you need to play the game or they will find someone else who can. Success in higher level jobs is based on working with all kinds of people with varied agendas. If you can't get their assistance and respect they will find someone else who does. Suck it up. Very few jobs are for people who work without interaction now days.
I'm not going into management. I have interest to do that. I'm just trying to do my job to the best of my ability but all anyone else seems to care about is being popular.
I have been at my job for 3 months and it hasn't been what I thought it would be. I choose to not get involved with office politics, gossip, etc. I come to work focused and want to do a good job at my job. But this outlook has made me a target for bullying. I have found myself working in a hostile environment over the last month and a half. With two particular women in my office. I have done nothing to them, and I believe just the fact that I'm dont involve myself in the gossip/backstabbing bothers some people. I could be very specific but it would be a long story.
Lets just say that I have been spoken down to and overheard/seen people say things about me when they didn't think I was paying attention. I'm 32 years old and I have never dealt with this before in whats supposed to be a professional environment. When it started I went to my manager and expressed some of my concerns. I was a little apprehensive because she tends to be gossipy as well with some of these women. But I knew I had to address it and hoped it would get better.
It hasn't.
Yesterday it actually got worse and I hit my breaking point. This one person in particular was very short with me yesterday and quite rude. No one else overheard the way she answered me and I snapped back at her. Well unfortunately some other people don't know the circumstances of the whole situation and it was reported to my manager that I was "out of line and jumped down her throat". I told my manager that wasn't the case and I just hit my limit. She didnt agree and said there were other people that overheard it that told a very different story.
Over the last 3 weeks I have been a little more introverted. I usually make small talk but not get involved in gossip but I have clammed up quite a bit since all this started happening. So when my manager and I were having this conversation she also told me people have said I come across unfriendly. I haven't been. I just don't want to be involved in drama, but I'm not rude. I always say hello and get my job done. She says this company will always have catty people and that it probably wont change and maybe this job isn't the right fit for me. She has no issue with my work performance or attendance! I have never heard of being not a good fit for being professional!
I told her I don't want to lose my job and I would like to turn the situation around if given the chance. She said "ok fresh start, but I still need to talk to our VP John". I plan on looking for a new job asap. But I need to keep this one for now. I just can't believe this is happening. Does this sound crazy???
It's typical. Look for a new job. Until you can find one, do whatever you can to suck up to everyone. And don't go to your boss with complaints about gossip - obviously, the office is that way because she is that way.
I think we all run into this type of situation at some point in our working lives. If you need this job then you are guying to have to psychologically ready yourself to manage it until you can find something better. You are already on the radar so you need to act fast to change their perception of you. So essentially you need to PLAY THE GAME. When I was in that situation, I literally made it a game. Every time I interacted with someone who rubbed me wrong way, I pretended I was on TV and acting a character. (I was miserable so I had to dig deep.) It worked. As soon as the chance arose, I was out of there and it didn't affect my evaluations or work references. Think about the big picture and its easier to muddle through.
I have been at my job for 3 months and it hasn't been what I thought it would be. I choose to not get involved with office politics, gossip, etc. I come to work focused and want to do a good job at my job. But this outlook has made me a target for bullying. I have found myself working in a hostile environment over the last month and a half. With two particular women in my office. I have done nothing to them, and I believe just the fact that I'm dont involve myself in the gossip/backstabbing bothers some people. I could be very specific but it would be a long story.
Lets just say that I have been spoken down to and overheard/seen people say things about me when they didn't think I was paying attention. I'm 32 years old and I have never dealt with this before in whats supposed to be a professional environment.
Actually, I've dealt with this at my office jobs, and I have gotten it for the same reason as you. I keep my head down and don't participate in the gossip circles and the drama queens don't like that. I too have dealt with these two-faced women who are nice to your face and then a few minutes later you see them in the corner whispering to each other. What's funny is I guess they don't realize that sound carries very well in a quiet office because sometimes you hear them badmouthing you. I especially feel sorry for the nice, quiet females, as they get it much worse than I do.
That kind of pathetic, childish behavior gets old very, very fast. Sometimes I feel like I am in junior high with the petty behavior *mainly* women engage in at these office jobs.
It kind of makes me want to go blue collar. That way I would be dealing with nothing but other men and be too busy for this kind of petty drama. Also, I wouldn't be staring at numbers on a computer screen for 8 hours straight every day, but that is a different topic.
It's typical. Look for a new job. Until you can find one, do whatever you can to suck up to everyone. And don't go to your boss with complaints about gossip - obviously, the office is that way because she is that way.
Exactly. Managment sets the tone in the office. If things are that bad, it`s because management has allowed it or is part of it. It starts at the top. Professionally led companies are not like that. some people think because you dress up to go to work, it means their place of work is professional, Wrong. some of the people wearing ties and dress skirts are the most unporofessional.
Try to get in on the "ground floor" of a new contractual job, that way all of you will be new at the same time.
Example: I worked at the local college for the new food service company that got the contract after the former food service contract was not renewed. All of us were new/original to the job. Nobody had status. Nice!
Has happened in all the offices I worked in. 'Play the game' is sound advice I think until you can find something better. Also it might help you to talk with a therapist or counselor to stay sane and have a stable touchstone to talk to/vent.
You didn't take the gossip 101 coarse in college did you? , this is what happens when you have a workforce full of college folks
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