Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Both here and in the Parenting forum I have read a lot of posts lately that glorify working long hours and climbing the ladder. Posters bemoan the fact that they had to quit their high powered jobs to be moms, because, hey, why work at all if you can't be in charge? I've been told people who leave work at 5:00 are lazy and will never go anywhere.
Doesn't anyone have a life outside of work anymore? Are any of you home to tuck your kids in at night? Have you decided against having a family because you work too many hours? Are you not able to enjoy life outside of work because there is no time? Am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Personally, I don't feel belonging to any traditional societal dissection, and discussions on this particular sub-forum (as well as one-uppersmanship in Parenting) are becoming less and less relevant... We work at home (not "from" home, that is, not for some boss in an office). It is not a desk job, neither, but a shop job. We are creating our jobs, the kids see us toiling around, never leaving to "some vague place" in a hurry in the mornings. The only ladder we are climbing is our own, but it looks rather like "walking the meadow" horizontally than "climbing" upward. For - what for? It already feels like real, unadulterated, sincere freedom.
To me I think the real problem is that people have such separated, segmented lives. They have 'work' where they want to do nothing but earn a paycheck and 'life' where they want to do nothing but have fun. What happened to trying to enjoy what you do for a living? I am friends with my co-workers. I know their spouses and kids. I do work more than 40 hours/week, but I also care about how my co-worker's daughter does in her soccer game. I think there is way too much segmentation of our lives today. The best job you can have is one where you just have your life, and you get paid for part of it. Focusing only on moving up the ladder (devoid of actually enjoying yourself) or only on your social life (without actually connecting with coworkers on a personal level) are two ways to be very unhappy, in my opinion.
I am far happier working 55-60 hours/week in a job where my coworkers and their families are friends of mine than I would be at 40 hours/week where I show up and get my work done without enjoying the day.
Yes, this consumerist culture and rampant one-upmanship/do everything the "best" way/psycho soccer mom dynamic that has developed over the last couple decades has really obscured some important focal points.
I look at my example. A little over a decade ago, I hit the "ladder" hard and heavy, coming from the absolute ground floor to a VP-level in 8 years. All it cost was a relationship with my family, a marriage (although that would have likely burned anyway), some of the connection with my kids and a number of friendships. About 5 years ago, one single moment in an afternoon changed that thinking for me. Since then, I still work hard - at being efficient - giving me tons of time to do stuff I enjoy, and the time and resources to actually interact with LIFE.
People lose this in the grind. They cut their rut so deep they'll never see daylight again. and it's not about "corporate this" or "big evil enterprise" that - heck, I work for a F100 corporation and am more comfortable and balanced than when I worked for a small company. It's about their inability to take control of their own life and actions and just be.
Maybe some people like it? Maybe some people didn't have a lot growing up and don't want their kids to have to deal with what they had to (My parents). Some people like power and money.
The question should be "I", not "we". Why do you care what other people do?
To me I think the real problem is that people have such separated, segmented lives. They have 'work' where they want to do nothing but earn a paycheck and 'life' where they want to do nothing but have fun. What happened to trying to enjoy what you do for a living? I am friends with my co-workers. I know their spouses and kids. I do work more than 40 hours/week, but I also care about how my co-worker's daughter does in her soccer game. I think there is way too much segmentation of our lives today. The best job you can have is one where you just have your life, and you get paid for part of it. Focusing only on moving up the ladder (devoid of actually enjoying yourself) or only on your social life (without actually connecting with coworkers on a personal level) are two ways to be very unhappy, in my opinion.
I am far happier working 55-60 hours/week in a job where my coworkers and their families are friends of mine than I would be at 40 hours/week where I show up and get my work done without enjoying the day.
Not all of us have something that we would enjoy doing for 55-60 hours per week, or even 40 hours per week, that pays enough to live on. Some of us are forced to work jobs that we don't particularly like (and/or work longer hours than we would like), and try to enjoy the little time off that we have as much as possible.
Also, what you are saying, no matter how much you love your job, does not help you if what you really want to do is to spend time with your family.
Not all of us have something that we would enjoy doing for 55-60 hours per week, or even 40 hours per week, that pays enough to live on. Some of us are forced to work jobs that we don't particularly like (and/or work longer hours than we would like), and try to enjoy the little time off that we have as much as possible.
Also, what you are saying, no matter how much you love your job, does not help you if what you really want to do is to spend time with your family.
No one forces a person to do anything. There are people who are unwilling to put in the time and effort to learn new skills, take a few risks and make their situation better. We typically get exactly what we go after in life. Giving up and settling on a job that you hate seems like an awful way to live, in my opinion. I am not the type of person to give up and not work like hell to find a way to make something better than a job I didn't like.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
