When someone is extra nice to you at work (coworkers, supervisor, management)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
My manager always praised me and told me what a great job I was doing and I told him I didn't think it felt genuine but he ultimately had no ulterior motive other than to keep me going.
I am nice right back. However, I'm pretty good and saying "no" politely and not allowing people to take advantage of me.
With the exception that a pretty young woman ought to be careful around an older man in a management position who wants to give lots of compliments and buy meals. There are polite ways to let a man know that one is not looking for a little relationship on the side at work without blowing it up into a scandal.
When someone at work, either a coworker or someone in management, is extra nice to you, does that make you suspicious?
It would be nice to think, oh, they're just being friendly. But in today's world, things like consistently buying someone lunch or getting them coffee, or offering to do favors for them, or just sucking up in general...it's hard not to question the motives of the person.
Do you start wondering if they might want something from you?
*Sigh* Threads like this are EXACTLY why certain workplaces are so miserable to be in.
Some people are nice because kindness is contagious and it inspires people to be nicer to you. The least you can say is good morning if I say good morning to you. But if I say good morning and notice you don't say it back at all, or make fun of me for saying good morning, then I learn my lesson and know to ignore you completely. The phrase "You attract more bees with honey than vinegar" applies here. When you are nice to someone and they give you a sneer or act repulsively, that's pretty much when you realize the person you are working with is a creep and isn't worth your time and more importantly, doesn't know how to be professional.
Real professionals actually know how to INTERACT with other human beings without being nasty. Admittedly, it's an art form to be social and to know how to interact with people and not a lot of people realize that the way they come across is super unprofessional. Then again, there are many people who just don't care.
And has it ever dawned on some of you people that there are some who like to help out because they don't have anything to do at the moment? I always offer help to my coworkers when I'm done with all my work and try to see what else they might need. Even when I'm not "busy" I am tackling work that will be expected down the pipeline. It's a way to maximize productivity.
I agree with what others are writing. Depends on the work environment. Having written that, even in a supportive work environment, I'd be careful about volunteering too much to these "nice" co-workers/supervisors as it can come around to bite you/be used against you.
I agree with what others are writing. Depends on the work environment. Having written that, even in a supportive work environment, I'd be careful about volunteering too much to these "nice" co-workers/supervisors as it can come around to bite you/be used against you.
The level of paranoia shown on this board is astounding.
Most people aren't out to get you. Knowing how many kids you have, that you play in a softball league, or you like double cream in your coffee isn't going to be used against you.
Sometime people are nice simply because they are nice, social, and care about other human beings.
The level of paranoia shown on this board is astounding.
Most people aren't out to get you. Knowing how many kids you have, that you play in a softball league, or you like double cream in your coffee isn't going to be used against you.
Sometime people are nice simply because they are nice, social, and care about other human beings.
I agree. I've been in the work force for many years, and I can't recall one nice deed by anyone at work that ended up being detrimental to me. Some people seem to waste too much time thinking others are plotting against them. They have to realize, that they just aren't that important for someone to go through the additional effort.
The level of paranoia shown on this board is astounding.
Most people aren't out to get you. Knowing how many kids you have, that you play in a softball league, or you like double cream in your coffee isn't going to be used against you.
Sometime people are nice simply because they are nice, social, and care about other human beings.
There are certain fields that are more competitive and cutthroat than others. In these fields, yes, people CAN be out to get you and you have to protect yourself.
As far as niceness, I'm not talking about normal, routine niceness. I'm talking about EXTRA niceness, like a coworker buying somebody lunch or little gifts constantly, or management giving a certain employee special favors or privileges that aren't given to others, or a coworker giving you compliments that are just a little too excessive. Things like that. In those cases, I do start to wonder, what is the hidden agenda here.
I have a supervisor who really lays it on thick and is super-fake; constant flattery and constant fake (unwarranted) promises. As well as super two-faced; the next minute she'll be gleefully picking you apart like a pack of wrathful hens for the smallest things. Other days she'll completely ignore your presence, as if you are and always have been the biggest nuisance in town. I don't really understand her behavior at all.
I would be suspicious as well. If a certain pattern of behavior (being nice to overly nice) has changed drastically, then it may speak of overcompensation of something. I would think all sorts of things. Are they feeling guilty for something? Are they buttering me up to dump a huge workload onto me? Are they a mole and gathering intel on me?
I work in a field that may be public sector, but have witnessed alot of shenanigans going on, and guess what, a so called work friend played the same game with me because we were going out for the same position, years ago. I made a mistake and started telling her my frustrations. Guess who got the job. So call me paranoid.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
