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I pondered this thought as I was experiencing EXTREME frustration with my current working situation and my desire to tell my organization to kiss my ass.
I asked myself why am I so frustrated with it? the first thought was, it's not what I am passionate about and the 2nd thought was...how can I get on track to do what it is that I love?
I've spent 2 years away from my industry doing a job that I really dislike to the core. I manage a homeless shelter.
I say it all of the time, anyone that wakes up and goes to a job they don't like is short changing themselves. That includes me. NONE of us are getting any younger. Yup, it's hard as hell to attain career success but the work and effort you put in is much more healthier in the long run than showing up to a job you don't like year after year.
You'll spend just as much energy disliking the situation as you would working your ass off trying to align yourself with something you feel great joy doing.
Sorry folks, I don't buy into the "be happy you have a job" mentality. Nope, not me. I will not buy it. I cannot be happy doing something that I do not like. My mental health cannot be replaced, a job can be. Sure, I am happy to pay the bills but I cannot put a price tag on my mental well being.
I work in IT as a software developer, and most of the time I love my job. I love development due to the creativity and freedom of designing a system from scratch.
In the last few months, the team I work on has been cut by a third. Now, instead of development (which is what I was hired to do), I am basically doing support work. I fix broken links for people, make sure orders get through, etc.
I am about to go crazy. I was promised someone new will be hired next month, and if that falls through it will be time for me to find a new job.
I will start out by saying I thank God to have a job in this economy. Because last year I was sitting at home twiddling my thumbs after my company let me go. But in my current position(Technical Account Manager) I believe I should have been in about probably 8 to 10 years ago. I am 2 years away from 40yrs old, and at times it seem like I was just stunted in the tech field, not to ever move higher. I started working in the tech field when I probably turned 22.
A lot of times I think I finally got my degree at the wrong time because I got my 2 year degree in Network Systems Administration in Aug '08, the same year as soon as I finished I got let go around Christmas '08, and now I'm here making money, that I should have been making in my early days in the tech field. And I know people say well heck at this time people with Masters or working as Mickey D's managers but, you asked and that's just how I feel about my life of success.
But one good thing may come of this, me and my wife made a decision last month, we are going to pack up like the Beverly hillbillies(without the millions) and move to a new State to try for a fresh start. We currently live in the Midwest and it's time for a change; so we decided to move either to Raleigh NC, Philadelphia, PA, or Seattle, WA. I still want to stay in tech, but try somewhere else except KC. I just feel my mother or father didn't have success in work here, me and my wife are not having success in work here, and I refuse to let my kids experience the same life.
I know what you mean. I am 36 and I made up my mind.......by June 2011 I would have bought my first of many businesses. I am tired of assing around with these damn companies. Also, I've made some poor choices as far as career path goes, although I have a great degree(Finance). I was impatient and unfocused, therefore I made some bad moves as it relates to jobs.
Nevertheless I cannot dwell on it. Come hell or high water, I WON'T be working for anyone in 12 months and It will not be because I got fired or downsized.
I am now digging myself out of this ditch. I hate every minute of it.
Good luck.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dasmin5
I will start out by saying I thank God to have a job in this economy. Because last year I was sitting at home twiddling my thumbs after my company let me go. But in my current position(Technical Account Manager) I believe I should have been in about probably 8 to 10 years ago. I am 2 years away from 40yrs old, and at times it seem like I was just stunted in the tech field, not to ever move higher. I started working in the tech field when I probably turned 22.
A lot of times I think I finally got my degree at the wrong time because I got my 2 year degree in Network Systems Administration in Aug '08, the same year as soon as I finished I got let go around Christmas '08, and now I'm here making money, that I should have been making in my early days in the tech field. And I know people say well heck at this time people with Masters or working as Mickey D's managers but, you asked and that's just how I feel about my life of success.
But one good thing may come of this, me and my wife made a decision last month, we are going to pack up like the Beverly hillbillies(without the millions) and move to a new State to try for a fresh start. We currently live in the Midwest and it's time for a change; so we decided to move either to Raleigh NC, Philadelphia, PA, or Seattle, WA. I still want to stay in tech, but try somewhere else except KC. I just feel my mother or father didn't have success in work here, me and my wife are not having success in work here, and I refuse to let my kids experience the same life.
You are speaking the truth Ron. At times I am like Lord it has to be more to life than this crap. Working for jobs that couldn't give a careless, just replace you. I know you can't go back over life and relive but, I truly wish in my twenties, I would have started over somewhere else. Man, I have been with my wife for going on 20 years and married this year for 14, our son is 15, and our daughter is 13. And when they were kids all we did is struggle, point blank. And a part of it is not making the right decision, but we make the best ones we can in life, whether right or wrong.
Then we end up dealing with it at this time in our live, the latter years. But like my wife said to me the other day, why not give it a shot and move somewhere else, that will be a "land of milk and honey" for us. If we don't like it move on, but, we have just been here and stunted in growth in our work life.
I told her, (like you stated in your post, where you wanted to be), that by the I reach 40, I wanted to be in a home, not renting, established in a good job, etc. You know we don't have nothing to lose, my mother died in 01, daddy is got killed in 77. My wife mother passed in '99, she has a father but, they are not really close. So what the heck do we have to lose by trying a fresh start in another State.. You feel me...
I pondered this thought as I was experiencing EXTREME frustration with my current working situation and my desire to tell my organization to kiss my ass.
I asked myself why am I so frustrated with it? the first thought was, it's not what I am passionate about and the 2nd thought was...how can I get on track to do what it is that I love?
I've spent 2 years away from my industry doing a job that I really dislike to the core. I manage a homeless shelter.
I say it all of the time, anyone that wakes up and goes to a job they don't like is short changing themselves. That includes me. NONE of us are getting any younger. Yup, it's hard as hell to attain career success but the work and effort you put in is much more healthier in the long run than showing up to a job you don't like year after year.
You'll spend just as much energy disliking the situation as you would working your ass off trying to align yourself with something you feel great joy doing.
Sorry folks, I don't buy into the "be happy you have a job" mentality. Nope, not me. I will not buy it. I cannot be happy doing something that I do not like. My mental health cannot be replaced, a job can be. Sure, I am happy to pay the bills but I cannot put a price tag on my mental well being.
Why are you not doing what it is that you love?
What are you doing to get you there?
Agreed agreed agreed - right now yes anyone with a job should be grateful because the grass is always greener, but REALLY having no money to pay your electric bill or go to the grocery IS worse than your awful job, BUT, you can still hate your job!!! My husband and I are both doing something to move into fields where our passions lie and where our pocketbooks will benefit.
And its exactly the train of thought you describe - "You'll spend just as much energy disliking the situation as you would working your ass off trying to align yourself with something you feel great joy doing" - that is our motivator. We both have college degrees but also made poor choices, didnt sieze moments, etc etc and so here we are mid 30s. My husband is going back to school to take prerequisites now in order to go to pharmacy school. Yes it will take approx 5-6 years total, but its like we said - spend those years bitching and moaning and the time passes anyway or take the classes. So in 6 years we will be raking in 100K easy. As for me, I am pursuing my love by also going back to school and studying holistic nutrition for a masters. I want to open my own consulting business.
For me, I just never had the entrepreneurial ability, never have been a inventive person and neither is my husband, we both got Bachelors of Arts and so you can imagine where that leads. Barring coming up with some greast business idea that takes minimal investment and is a sure thing, we are both putting our apples in education and brand new career paths.
You gotta do something!! Life is too short to be miserable.
Last edited by changeyourthoughts; 05-13-2010 at 12:26 PM..
Reason: typo
I know exactly what you mean. Dude, if you decide by 40 you want your life to be vastly different from what it is today, in 2 yers. FOCUS and make it happen come hell or high water. Do it for your wife and kids and more importantly, do it for yourself. I can rember the times when i did accomplish my goal, the feelings I had were awesome. I want those feelings back.
As one of my gal friends told me, "Ron, it looks like the fire in your eyes has gone out".........She was correct 100%. I am mentally exhausted and just tired.
I cannot give up because, believe it or not, I am within arms reach of living a very good life. I can't stop now.
In 2 years when you're in you new home and happy with your income and job and I'll be looking to buy my second business, we will look back and say......"never will I allow myself to go through that again as long as I live".
Ron
Quote:
Originally Posted by dasmin5
You are speaking the truth Ron. At times I am like Lord it has to be more to life than this crap. Working for jobs that couldn't give a careless, just replace you. I know you can't go back over life and relive but, I truly wish in my twenties, I would have started over somewhere else. Man, I have been with my wife for going on 20 years and married this year for 14, our son is 15, and our daughter is 13. And when they were kids all we did is struggle, point blank. And a part of it is not making the right decision, but we make the best ones we can in life, whether right or wrong.
Then we end up dealing with it at this time in our live, the latter years. But like my wife said to me the other day, why not give it a shot and move somewhere else, that will be a "land of milk and honey" for us. If we don't like it move on, but, we have just been here and stunted in growth in our work life.
I told her, (like you stated in your post, where you wanted to be), that by the I reach 40, I wanted to be in a home, not renting, established in a good job, etc. You know we don't have nothing to lose, my mother died in 01, daddy is got killed in 77. My wife mother passed in '99, she has a father but, they are not really close. So what the heck do we have to lose by trying a fresh start in another State.. You feel me...
great reply. I wish you and hubby the best. Even if your hubby doesn't finish until he's 45y/o, so what. He'll still be working for about another 25 years or so. He may as well do something he like for those 20 plus years.
As you stated life IS too short, more than we even know it.
I think the path you're taking for your Master's degree is awesome. That has great potential to do well for you. Especially with the push for more organic living/lifestyle and living naturally and holistically.
Is you learn the business side of it, you could be making $100k from your income alone............working from home.
Get on the ball and keep rolling!
Best of luck.
Quote:
Originally Posted by changeyourthoughts
Agreed agreed agreed - right now yes anyone with a job should be grateful because the grass is always greener, but REALLY having no money to pay your electric bill or go to the grocery IS worse than your awful job, BUT, you can still hate your job!!! My husband and I are both doing something to move into fields where our passions lie and where our pocketbooks will benefit.
And its exactly the train of thought you describe - "You'll spend just as much energy disliking the situation as you would working your ass off trying to align yourself with something you feel great joy doing" - that is our motivator. We both have college degrees but also made poor choices, didnt sieze moments, etc etc and so here we are mid 30s. My husband is going back to school to take prerequisites now in order to go to pharmacy school. Yes it will take approx 5-6 years total, but its like we said - spend those years bitching and moaning and the time passes anyway or take the classes. So in 6 years we will be raking in 100K easy. As for me, I am pursuing my love by also going back to school and studying holistic nutrition for a masters. I want to open my own consulting business.
For me, I just never had the entrepreneurial ability, never have been a inventive person and neither is my husband, we both got Bachelors of Arts and so you can imagine where that leads. Barring coming up with some greast business idea that takes minimal investment and is a sure thing, we are both putting our apples in education and brand new career paths.
You gotta do something!! Life is too short to be miserable.
I'm not as successful as I could have been in My career at Target,because I refuse to brown nose. I refuse to kiss the asses of the jerks that I've had to work under!
No one is happy with where they are, everyone knows they could have made a better choice here and there. It's not a big deal, just keep looking for something better, if you truly have the talent, you'll find it.
I think most people find positions that they are suited to (a 45 year old Burger King manager won't get into VC, etc)
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Yes and No..
