My Experience At OKCupid
Up until about thirty minutes ago I had an OKCupid account. I had it for about four months. OKCupid is probably the best known free dating website. I never met a guy who sent me a message at OKCupid. I did talk to two of them via phone. Neither was exactly to my liking, so I passed on both. When it comes to meeting strange guys, I’m pretty picky. In fact, "pretty leery" might be a more accurate term.
I decided to close my account because I have been in a relationship for a few months and it shows no sign of losing steam. Ironically, if the guy I’m currently dating were to have sent me a message at OKCupid, I would have probably rejected it. In fact, I’m sure of it. The man I’m in a relationship with is older, and I know he would have never passed my pickiness test. His age alone would have done him in.
I averaged about five inquiries a day at OKCupid. The first message I got was “Hi, wassup”. Two words, and one of them wasn’t even a real word. I did not know how to respond to such a message, so I didn’t. I would get a lot of messages that would say something like, “You have a sexy smile”, or “You are a hot lady”. That’s it. Five words, and not very imaginative words at that. At least they are all actual words. Anyway, I would not respond to these messages either. A guy has to do better than five words. Even ten-word messages were insufficient.
I received several offers for casual sex. All but one of these messages was actually polite and non-graphic. I did not respond to these messages either.
It was not uncommon for me to receive a message from a guy wearing no shirt in his OKCupid profile photo. Thankfully they were always wearing pants. Usually these men were standing in front of a mirror with their cellphone camera, and the photo was of their reflection. They were always well-built guys, but a message from a shirtless guy just doesn’t do it for me. I’m sure the strategy will work on some women though.
I always read the messages that contained at least two paragraphs. To me, two or more paragraphs indicated that the man had found my profile interesting enough to put in a few minutes’ worth of effort. One message really caught my attention. In one sentence he wrote humorously of his dislike of drivers with turn signals stuck blinking. A sentence or two later he mentioned his love of chocolate sprinkles on his ice cream. Now and then throughout the message he would add some additional comment enclosed in parentheses. Near the end of the message he apologized for his overuse of parentheses. Of course the apology was in parentheses. I clicked on the man’s profile and although he was not amazingly handsome, he seemed smart, and he clearly had a great sense of humor. I happened to read the message late one evening, and I had every intention of giving it an enthusiastic response the next day, but 24 hours later the author had closed his OKCupid account. I’d like to think he closed his account because he found an enchanting lady. Not only was he good-natured, but he was clearly willing to put in ample effort at OKCupid to find success, and he was wearing a shirt.
I decided to close my account because I have been in a relationship for a few months and it shows no sign of losing steam. Ironically, if the guy I’m currently dating were to have sent me a message at OKCupid, I would have probably rejected it. In fact, I’m sure of it. The man I’m in a relationship with is older, and I know he would have never passed my pickiness test. His age alone would have done him in.
I averaged about five inquiries a day at OKCupid. The first message I got was “Hi, wassup”. Two words, and one of them wasn’t even a real word. I did not know how to respond to such a message, so I didn’t. I would get a lot of messages that would say something like, “You have a sexy smile”, or “You are a hot lady”. That’s it. Five words, and not very imaginative words at that. At least they are all actual words. Anyway, I would not respond to these messages either. A guy has to do better than five words. Even ten-word messages were insufficient.
I received several offers for casual sex. All but one of these messages was actually polite and non-graphic. I did not respond to these messages either.
It was not uncommon for me to receive a message from a guy wearing no shirt in his OKCupid profile photo. Thankfully they were always wearing pants. Usually these men were standing in front of a mirror with their cellphone camera, and the photo was of their reflection. They were always well-built guys, but a message from a shirtless guy just doesn’t do it for me. I’m sure the strategy will work on some women though.
I always read the messages that contained at least two paragraphs. To me, two or more paragraphs indicated that the man had found my profile interesting enough to put in a few minutes’ worth of effort. One message really caught my attention. In one sentence he wrote humorously of his dislike of drivers with turn signals stuck blinking. A sentence or two later he mentioned his love of chocolate sprinkles on his ice cream. Now and then throughout the message he would add some additional comment enclosed in parentheses. Near the end of the message he apologized for his overuse of parentheses. Of course the apology was in parentheses. I clicked on the man’s profile and although he was not amazingly handsome, he seemed smart, and he clearly had a great sense of humor. I happened to read the message late one evening, and I had every intention of giving it an enthusiastic response the next day, but 24 hours later the author had closed his OKCupid account. I’d like to think he closed his account because he found an enchanting lady. Not only was he good-natured, but he was clearly willing to put in ample effort at OKCupid to find success, and he was wearing a shirt.
Total Comments 4
Comments
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Hiii
I got here from the thread titled "Advice for women looking for love" in the relationship forum.
I like to read about interesting experience from interesting people and I throughly enjoyed this blog.
Anyway, I have a question and I hope you would be willing to provide me with an answer:
How did you meet your current boyfriend? I mean you had stated in your blog that you would have rejected on the face of it so how did the two of you meet?
Thanks!Posted 10-21-2012 at 05:59 PM by zrk9a
Updated 10-21-2012 at 06:01 PM by zrk9a (corrected smiley face typo) -
I met him in a mall parking lot something like three months ago. His name is Steve. He fixed a flat tire on my car. In payment I offered to buy him lunch. Steve wasn't too keen on the idea (he said that "compensation was not necessary") but he finally agreed. Things have kind of grown from there. He is somewhat older than me and it has made things interesting.Quote:Originally Posted by zrk9a
Hiii
I got here from the thread titled "Advice for women looking for love" in the relationship forum.
I like to read about interesting experience from interesting people and I throughly enjoyed this blog.
Anyway, I have a question and I hope you would be willing to provide me with an answer:
How did you meet your current boyfriend? I mean you had stated in your blog that you would have rejected on the face of it so how did the two of you meet?
Thanks!Posted 10-21-2012 at 06:24 PM by KatieGal
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Thank you for posting you thoughts about Okcupid. I started out on match.com and left after three months. I felt the process was not for me. The problem with online dating is you don't have benefit of the chemistry that occurs between two people when they meet face-to-faced. Your experience with the guy you are dating proves that. As you said if you had read his profile online you would have rejected him.
What got to me the most (ok, ticked me off) when I was on Match was the lack of communications. When I found a profile I thought was interesting I would study the profile and write a message focused on what I found in her profile. I did not just copy and paste a canned response. I also never sent some lame response like "hi baby!". I put some time into my message. What did I get back? Nothing. I sent out 25 emails and got 3 back. Two said "sorry I found someone". One was a very simple "we are not compatible". I replied back to the three thanking them for taking the time to respond. The way I figure it if I am taking the time to be on the site and write a personal message they can at least take the time for some response. Now I did not expect to get a bunch of positive responses. If everyone of those 25 had been a positive response I would have gone crazy trying to keep up with 25 first dates. I expected 99% rejection rate. After all I just need ONE good response.
The straw that broke the Camel's back was a message I sent to a lady. I had the optional read receipt on Match. The next day I saw that she looked at my profile but NEVER opened my message. What!! Good grief. You are on the site so play the game. I dumped out of my 6 month membership at 3 months.
So a few months passed, I got bored, so I thought I would try OkCupid. Same thing going on here. No response. I found one lady where we had a very high numerical match. Something like 97% match 90% friend. One would think I would get something back on this one. I sent a short message about the match numbers. Waited, waited, waited, nothing. A month later I thought I would send another message. This time much longer and focused on her profile. Still waiting. Yes, I know I am venting. Sorry. The old fashion way of meeting people is still the best.
I will admit my profile is not the most exciting thing you are going to read. I don't play Golf, I don't own a boat, I don't watch football on Sunday. My hobbies are all technical in nature. I think men on these sites are expected to fit into a the pattern of the typical American male. If you deviate from that they look at your profile as being a weirdo. I have a picture of me in a kilt on my profile. I think that freaks out many of the profile readers. So for those trying the online dating don't get your hopes up. Get out in the real world and meet real people face-to-face.Posted 12-03-2012 at 07:19 PM by TowerHeights
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My message is sadly less personal. I signed up with Okcupid on my android tablet and installed the app there. So, havent uploaded a picture of myself but being more competent with my windows 10 desktop I figured I could enclose it in an email on my windows 10 desktop.
Problem is today my password didn't work so I tried to reset my password on the android tablet and it sent me an email message on my PC where my email client resides. Okay, but the "reset password" email sent me to a part of my account where I tell "What would your friends say about you?" for my profile. It also said I had to upload my picture before my account would be visible. Okay,0 but what good will that do if I don't have a password?
Essentially, do I need to upload a picture to get to resetting my password or must I put Okcupid on my PC, or put my email on my Lenovo android tablet? Does anybody relate to this and what do you suggest? Thanks!Posted 02-21-2017 at 11:52 PM by Jim-5555
