I caught an old episode of the "Waltons" last night and it brought me back to my childhood. (Back to "simplier" times!)...My Dad used to call my younger son "John Boy" when he was small. My son loved it! (And remembered it all his life.)...You'd never catch my older son watching old reruns of the "Waltons" or "Little House on the Prairie." But my younger son loved watching these shows because they gave him a "window" into the past. And they were about families...My older son took pride in being a "modern" and "with the times" kind of guy! I'm sure he viewed the rest of us as "old grey mares" because we enjoyed telling "tales" from the past. And taking trips down "memory lane."...My younger son "ate" it all "up" and kept begging for "more" when we started sharing stories from the past. He said this gave him a chance to get to know us even "better." And he loved hearing about life back in the "old days."...Both of my sons are gone now along with my husband and parents and everyone else. I am the only "apple" left on my "family tree." Watching the old episode of the "Waltons" last night helped me feel like I was part of a family again. (And this was sure nice!)
Be careful about what you "say!"...Hidden rules and regulations in relationships!
Posted 04-28-2013 at 10:13 AM by CArizona
Are we looking for "yes people" when we hook-up with new friends? (People who will always agree with us?)...Or are we searching for some diversity? And challenges?...I spend most of my time as a loner. (Outside groups.) So everytime I step-out and dare to open my mouth I can come across as an "oddball."...I honestly believe that we have a great deal to learn from each other. But we can "block" new insights and knowledge from "coming in" if we surround ourselves with "like-minded thinkers." ("Birds of the same feather!") How do you feel about it?
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How can friends "stay close" when they live miles and miles apart and don't stay in touch very often?...Right now, I could use one or more really "close" friends....I'm always going to need some private time and space. So, I wouldn't want a friend who comes knocking at my door 24/7. (And "suffocates me!")...But, I know I need a little more "closeness" in my daily life with someone...I have some acquaintances. I "touch base" with a few people "here and there.".. It's just not the same as being "truly close."...I'm starting a "wish list." And, I'm going to put having one or more "close-close friends" at the top of my list. (Friends who live near me.)Posted 01-06-2015 at 09:32 AM by CArizona
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I think we all have a set of "rules" or a "code of conduct" when it comes to how we act and "operate" in our daily lives. Don't you?...For instance, I have a taboo against being "loud." I don't want to cause a "ruckus" or draw attention to myself when I am out in public...Most of my friends are pretty low-key and soft-spoken too. So I don't run into many conflicts...But every now and then, I've run into a few "surprises" with new friends who turn into "boomers" when they are out in public and enjoy being the center of attention...I don't tell them to "quiet down." They have a right to be who they are! I just stand off to the side and try to act "invisible!" I let them bask in the "limelight" all by themselves!Posted 09-30-2015 at 08:24 AM by CArizona
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I tend to shy-away from people who have a "sharp tongue." People who make a habit of being sarcastic in a "mean-spirited" kind of way. How about you?...I like to "play around" and laugh and have fun but I don't want to hurt anyone. I'm not into mean "put-downs" and "jabs."...I want friends to feel relaxed around me. And, I don't want to worry that someone is going to "cut me down" or take a "punch" at me without warning.. How do you feel about it?Posted 10-02-2015 at 08:32 AM by CArizona
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I try to avoid people who are tempermental. People who slide "up" and "down" really fast...People who are famous for their bad moods and temper tantrums when things don't go "their way."...I ran into a customer service clerk yesterday who was obviously NOT a very "happy camper." She seemed mad and full of self-pity. Ready to throw "darts" at anyone who crossed her path...Maybe she just got lectured by her boss. Or, she was pressured to work on her day off...Maybe she was dealing with "family problems." Who knows?...She was definitely in a bad mood and it "showed." She was determined to make everyone else "suffer" and "pay" for her unhappiness. And misery...Sad! Sad that she couldn't take control of her emotions and "flip" things "around" a little bit...It's no fun to be mad and angry all day long!Posted 10-05-2015 at 08:22 AM by CArizona
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I'm not sure if I could handle a lot of "everyday friends" anymore. (Or, right now anyway.)...I've gotten used to "going it alone" since my family members died. But, I do have a few "hit and miss" friends who live out of the area...We talk on the phone or text every few weeks or so. Sometimes, we go for months without talking when we get busy. I still feel close to them even though we're not in contact all the time...I just do my "own thing" and make decisions in my life on a daily basis all by my "lonesome." And do okay...If I ran into a friend who expected "more" from me right now, I'd probably end-up feeling overwhelmed. (Go "bonkers!")Posted 10-11-2015 at 11:36 AM by CArizona
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I like to do my "own thing." Be true to myself!...I'm alone so much of the time now, it takes a little adjustment (on my part) when I spend time with friends or other people...We all have our own "ways" and our very own set of "norms" and culture...I had lunch "out" with a new friend and her husband the other day. They are both super nice people. But, my friend went a little "overboard" when it came to making suggestions about what her husband and I "should eat." (Or order from the menu.)...I found what I wanted right away and I really didn't need any "help." In the end, my friend ordered extra things "just in case." We had way too much food on the table. I'm glad my friend insisted on paying the bill!...My friend wants to go out to eat again soon. But, I keep having "second thoughts" about it...It's not easy to tell people to "butt-out" and mind their own "business!"Posted 10-24-2015 at 08:59 AM by CArizona
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I'm all for having a good "work ethic." Sometimes, chores need to be done. But, I try to avoid getting into the heavy-duty "suffering martyr" mode. Where I put myself through horrible pain and agony and even start to play "victim" just because I have work to do...I have a few friends who never "loosen-up." They don't try to add a little joy and play or humor to their "work-load."...Everything is super serious and somber. No fun allowed!...They turn into "grouches" and feel sorry for themselves. I don't want to walk around in a "bad mood" for long periods of time even if I have chores to do. It's no fun!.. I don't want to turn work into "hell on earth!" So, I keep "tabs" on my moods and my state of mind when I have jobs to accomplish. I don't want to turn into a big "grump!" Or "scrooge!"Posted 10-24-2015 at 09:27 AM by CArizona
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I ran into a lady at the grocery store the other day who definitely seemed to "know me." Her face seemed familiar but I just couldn't "place her" right off the bat...I was super tired that day. Running on "empty." Just getting over the flu...It turns out that the lady worked at my vet's office a few years back. She said she sure loved my cat Silky and still misses him. (He passed-away in 2012.).. My eyes started to "tear-up" when she mentioned Silky and she reached over and gave me a hug. This was sweet! I could use more hugs!Posted 12-08-2015 at 07:55 AM by CArizona
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My friend Jan remembers everything I say to her. (And vica-versa!) We have a long history together that dates way back to our childhood...Lots of "shared memories!" We know each other really well. I feel "blessed" that Jan has been part of my life for 50-plus years!...I'd love to have this same type of closeness with other friends too but it's not always possible....Some of my relationships stay at the "aquaintanceship" level. Well, maybe we're a little more than aquaintances but we're not really close...We don't reveal our deeper "selves" and secrets to each other. (Not very often anyway!)...We talk about the weather and our daily chores and activities. It's okay to do a lot of complaining...But, there's not always a "depth" to our conversations where we open-up and talk about who we've been, or what we've seen and done throughout our lives, or what we've learned...Everything stays more at a "surface level."Posted 12-10-2015 at 07:05 AM by CArizona
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I have a new friend named Ella. Our friendship seems to have potential...Last night, we talked on the phone for 2 hours and never ran out of things to say. This is a good sign!...Ella is a widow and by herself too. We're making plans to go out for lunch soon. It will be nice to have a companion. (Someone who wants to get out and do things and live life!)...All of my other local friends are busy, or "homebodies!"Posted 05-28-2016 at 10:56 AM by CArizona
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I drove up to visit my new friend Ella on Monday. (Memorial Day)...I got to her house in the morning. We sat around and talked until 2 or so...Neither one of us mentioned food or "eating" ahead of time. It was a last minute decision to drive up to visit her. She said she could really use some company...I figured that she might have a few cookies or snacks around. (Like I do when I have guests.)...But I was wrong. No snacks...Lunchtime came and went and I finally had to leave because I was hungry...I stopped and ate on the way home and drank lots of iced tea. It was a hot day and Ella's house seemed really hot too. I don't think her a/c is working properly...Guess it takes awhile to know what to expect when it comes to new friends.Posted 06-01-2016 at 03:41 PM by CArizona
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I have another friend who never has snacks on hand when guests come to visit. She rarely offers someone a drink either...I'm expected to help myself to coffee, or ask for water or a cold drink if I'm thirsty...I've brought treats or appetizers over to her house myself so I won't go hours and hours without eating...I guess some people don't like to play host or hostess. Or, they just don't think about it...I enjoy having snacks on hand or preparing food for guests. I like to spoil people who come to visit me. How about you?Posted 06-02-2016 at 08:26 AM by CArizona
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Life has knocked the "socks" off of me so I'm not quite the same as I used to be...I don't act like I "know everything" anymore. And I prefer to be around people who admit that they don't "know everything" either...There are so many different sides to each issue. My views and my ideas may seem foreign and even crazy to other people. (And vica-versa!)...I try hard to be open-minded but I know that some of my beliefs are "deeply-rooted" and wlll probably never change. But, I've been able to expand and broaden my "scope" when it comes to some things...I want to keep learning. I don't want to get "stuck." And I like to be around people who consider themselves "students" of life too. How about you?Posted 06-04-2016 at 08:47 AM by CArizona
