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As I guy I consider this as totally unacceptable behavior, period. I have never witnessed this in Atlanta, but I don't think it would go over here well at all.
What century do you live in? Women don't want to be objectified like that when they're just trying to go about their business just like everyone else.
I personally find it threatening when men feel they need to get my attention by yelling something vaguely sexual at me while I'm walking down the street. I don't want that kind of attention from a perfect stranger. I would never, ever be interested in a creep like that.
I havent been on city data in almost 2 years but I seen this reaction to my posts, and still reading comprehension is lost and some of you people are reacting off sheer emotion. I clearly said if a guy approaches you and he is polite or respectful whats the big where the harm in that?
So if I see a woman that I'm attracted to and interested in and I politely and respectful introduce myself thats being a creep???
Thats how I've met almost every woman I've been with since HS, how else are you supposed to meet someone of the opposite gender???
I'm not talking about like yelling "Yooo Maa!" from across the street but respectfully introducing yourself is not a problem you ppl are so uptight
NYC takes the cake! Every time I go there and hanging out with my fam, someone is catcalling my auntie or my cousins. I think it's funny but my aunt (who's from the Bronx) says it's one of the reasons she moved away.
No kidding. I remember walking through Harlem once with my WIFE and hearing disrespectful men catcalling. We just ignored them and kept on walking; I couldn't stop and fight a horde of dudes by myself, and on their own turf at that. I'm not Bruce Lee...lol.
I havent been on city data in almost 2 years but I seen this reaction to my posts, and still reading comprehension is lost and some of you people are reacting off sheer emotion. I clearly said if a guy approaches you and he is polite or respectful whats the big where the harm in that?
So if I see a woman that I'm attracted to and interested in and I politely and respectful introduce myself thats being a creep???
Thats how I've met almost every woman I've been with since HS, how else are you supposed to meet someone of the opposite gender???
I'm not talking about like yelling "Yooo Maa!" from across the street but respectfully introducing yourself is not a problem you ppl are so uptight
What you meant wasn't clear AT ALL from your posts. The thread was about catcalling and your first response was this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by joshd9124
If a guy isn't being disrespectful or weird I never got why women hated this so much.
Since this is a thread about catcalling, one would only assume that "this" was referring to catcalling--no one here is talking about generally approaching a girl.
The only reading comprehension failure happened when you read the initial post and thought "catcalling" meant approaching a woman and making a gentlemanly introduction.
To answer the OP, I think it's gotta be NYC. Most women I know here (my fiancee included) have nasty s**t said to them or gross gestures made toward them, just about every single day. At the very least it happens multiple times a week. That's not an exaggeration. It's such a common occurrence that women here don't feel the need to bring it up every time it happens.
Guys have no concept of what it's like in the shoes of a woman and it's so easy for them to brush this off as no big deal.
Location: Watching half my country turn into Gilead
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I think it's fairly obvious that NYC is the winner here. There was even a video that went viral not too long ago about a woman who was catcalled 108 times in the span of 10 hours.
What I'm more concerned with is the why aspect. NYC, being the hyper-dense, structurally snug mega-city that it is, naturally lends itself to this behavior. It's a lot harder to effectively catcall someone who's in a car, with windows and a radio, than it is someone on a subway train or sidewalk. So there's the obvious density and structural argument. But how about culturally? NYC has an infamous reputation as being an abrasive, brash, "you talking to me?" type of city, but is catcalling a manifestation of this city persona, or is it something else?
And I'd also like to point out, as a Dominican man myself, that Latino men pride themselves on machismo. It is ingrained in the culture and instilled in boys from their youth. While I don't want to turn this into a race/ethnicity issue (Latino is an ethnicity, not race), as men of all backgrounds engage in this behavior, I do personally feel it is more prevalent in Latino culture--and not just the lower classes, either. So there's that wrinkle to the problem, though again, men of all backgrounds engage in this behavior.
I think it's fairly obvious that NYC is the winner here. There was even a video that went viral not too long ago about a woman who was catcalled 108 times in the span of 10 hours.
What I'm more concerned with is the why aspect. NYC, being the hyper-dense, structurally snug mega-city that it is, naturally lends itself to this behavior. It's a lot harder to effectively catcall someone who's in a car, with windows and a radio, than it is someone on a subway train or sidewalk. So there's the obvious density and structural argument. But how about culturally? NYC has an infamous reputation as being an abrasive, brash, "you talking to me?" type of city, but is catcalling a manifestation of this city persona, or is it something else?
And I'd also like to point out, as a Dominican man myself, that Latino men pride themselves on machismo. It is ingrained in the culture and instilled in boys from their youth. While I don't want to turn this into a race/ethnicity issue (Latino is an ethnicity, not race), as men of all backgrounds engage in this behavior, I do personally feel it is more prevalent in Latino culture--and not just the lower classes, either. So there's that wrinkle to the problem, though again, men of all backgrounds engage in this behavior.
I get what you mean. However, for the same reason denser cities tend to be safer overall, I'd think that works against catcalling. For example, a very dense city makes it harder to get away with crime given how many witnesses there are to everything. You'd think the same thing would be true for catcalling, as it's not really a socially sanctioned thing to do, except maybe in some of the less educated neighborhoods (not convinced of that though).
Maybe the anonymity of New York makes it easy to get away with. Catcalling, while very rude, is not quite the same thing as mugging someone. It might rub people the wrong way who hear it, but they probably won't do anything about it and just carry on.
I also really don't think men of all backgrounds engage in this behavior. Let's be honest about who it usually is. Watch that NYC catcall video again. From the looks of it, it seems to be the homeless, and non-whites at that.
Location: Watching half my country turn into Gilead
3,530 posts, read 4,171,933 times
Reputation: 2925
Quote:
Originally Posted by bjimmy24
I get what you mean. However, for the same reason denser cities tend to be safer overall, I'd think that works against catcalling. For example, a very dense city makes it harder to get away with crime given how many witnesses there are to everything. You'd think the same thing would be true for catcalling, as it's not really a socially sanctioned thing to do, except maybe in some of the less educated neighborhoods (not convinced of that though).
Maybe the anonymity of New York makes it easy to get away with. Catcalling, while very rude, is not quite the same thing as mugging someone. It might rub people the wrong way who hear it, but they probably won't do anything about it and just carry on.
I also really don't think men of all backgrounds engage in this behavior. Let's be honest about who it usually is. Watch that NYC catcall video again. From the looks of it, it seems to be the homeless, and non-whites at that.
I rarely see or hear catcalling in Boston.
That video, while eye-opening, actually came under fire for selectively editing out the numerous white cat-callers. I just posted it because it was the most famous example and it was in NYC. The video's director had a ridiculous number of excuses for their exclusion ("noise pollution, passing comments, people walking in front of the camera"). So while I do think people of color engage in the activity more (for a variety of socio-economic reasons), white guys aren't some small minority of cases, either.
And I'm not sure I'm following your argument--your two paragraphs seem to be contradicting each other. Your first postulates that NYC's density makes it harder for people to "get away" with catcalling, as opposed to less-dense, car-oriented cities. But then your second states that the anonymity of that density allows this to happen. Which is it? I agree with your second paragraph in that NYC has so many people that the individual is lessened--I just want to make sure I understand the reasoning for your first, which seems to be contradicting the paragraph I agree with.
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