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You've gotten lots of good advice. The only thing I'd add is that I totally understand the need for sugar at the end of the day. A couple of months ago my daughter and I decided to give up our after dinner sweets (usually icecream or cookies or something similar) and it has been difficult. I've been eating stale leftover Christmas candy canes to compensate (like an alcoholic drinking the cooking sherry). They're small and I eat one or two, but they still do the trick. I ate the last one last night though.
When you're craving a Hershey bar, you might find that a couple of squares of very dark, high cocoa content chocolate will satisfy you as well. Or a glass of skim milk with a serving of Nestle's Quick powder. At least you're getting some calcium and protein that way. You might also try writing down your goals and reasons for losing weight and when you're craving the sweets, re-read your goals. Finally, if you just can't stand it, can you figure the amount of calories in a Hershey bar and cut that number of calories somewhere earlier in the day without sacrificing nutrition?
The only thing I'd add is that I totally understand the need for sugar at the end of the day
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I know people pooh-pooh flavored yogurts, but I eat the smaller or kid-sized cups of Greek yogurt as dessert. Yeah, they've got sugar in them, but if eating key lime pie-flavored yogurt keeps me from eating actual key lime pie, I consider that a win.
I looked forward to eating something good or a sweet treat at the end of the day, and it's really all I had to look forward to at the end of the workday.
Mightyqueen, interesting opening post.
If I might chime in. I am very thin, have always been thin, but always have worked extremely hard at it (I run marathons, exercise fanatically-- all that stuff).
Here is a piece of advice I beg you to take: a calorie is a calorie is calorie. Don't listen to "advice" written in books or advice given by overweight people. Why not listen to people who are thin? If you want a candy bar at the end of the day, HAVE ONE. The 270 calories in a Snickers bar is not going to make you any fatter than the 270 calories in 2 apples and a salad with low-cal dressing.
If you walk 2 miles every day and eat 1300 calories a day YOU WILL LOSE WEIGHT. If you want to use those 1200 daily calories eating candy, do it. All this nonsense about carbs being bad, bread being bad-- nonsense.
If I might chime in. I am very thin, have always been thin, but always have worked extremely hard at it (I run marathons, exercise fanatically-- all that stuff).
Here is a piece of advice I beg you to take: a calorie is a calorie is calorie. Don't listen to "advice" written in books or advice given by overweight people. Why not listen to people who are thin? If you want a candy bar at the end of the day, HAVE ONE. The 270 calories in a Snickers bar is not going to make you any fatter than the 270 calories in 2 apples and a salad with low-cal dressing.
If you walk 2 miles every day and eat 1300 calories a day YOU WILL LOSE WEIGHT. If you want to use those 1200 daily calories eating candy, do it. All this nonsense about carbs being bad, bread being bad-- nonsense.
Mantra: a calorie is a calorie is a calorie.
I agree however you can make it easier on yourself by choosing foods that are more healthy and filling. You can eat whatever you want as long as you are at a calorie deficit and lose weight. But eating surgery simple carbs to do it will make a person crazy because they will constantly be hungry not to mention feel like crap.
Simple carbs should eaten in moderation with the focus on proteins, complex carbs and healthy fats.
I too work hard at keeping my weight in check.
I think the biggest problem people have is the fact that they do not want to put in the work to lose weight. They want a simple solution...eat all the protein and fat you want and magically lose weight! No need to exercise just eat fat! This may allow you to lose weight in the short term but who in the heck is going to want to spend the rest of their lives avoiding the foods they love and eating all that fat day after day? Not to mention the damage it is going to do in the long run.
If you walk 2 miles every day and eat 1300 calories a day YOU WILL LOSE WEIGHT. If you want to use those 1200 daily calories eating candy, do it. All this nonsense about carbs being bad, bread being bad-- nonsense.
Mantra: a calorie is a calorie is a calorie.
If this were true, we'd all do it. Someone will lose weight to a certain point but have you ever heard of malnutrition? So much emphasis on calories with zero interest in nutrition. That's the problem with most diet. No one is really paying attention to what our body needs but only focus on how much calories should be consumed or deducted.
My struggle with weight has been life long. Eventually you just get TIRED of fighting it. And fore mental health -- figure out a way to try to be healthy without obsessing about it. Obsessing i TIRING....and it drains energy from other aspects of your life. Who wants to live like that.
The truth is I can't eat anything I want and as much as I want. So let me figure out what I CAN live with.
People look for all these deep reasons people overeat....hungry, angry lonely, tired,...and that's true, but how about being honest and admitting we LIKE food. Why do I overeat pizza, macaroni and cheese, potato salad, french fries, etc because I LIKE them. I don't overeat on food I don't like. I don't even EAT food I don't like.
Who wouldn't want to take a pill and be able to eat all they want and not gain weight. My issue with that is...I'm VERY anti-side effect, so even if it did exist it would have to have practically no negatives to it before I'd trust the drugmaker and the gov't to take it.
Look at the drug Alli....yeah...it helps you loose weight but you'll also crap al over yourself if you eat too much fat. We'll that's not the way I want to find out .....oops...guess that meal had too much fat in it. Any drug that in the packaging tells you to take an extra pair of underpants and slacks with you ....is not for me. (but that's just me.) I don't know how well Alli has done with sales. I wonder. There are people who are taking it.
That also ties into knowing what you're willing to do and NOT wiling to do. Some people take Alli, I won't.
You've gotten lots of good advice. The only thing I'd add is that I totally understand the need for sugar at the end of the day. A couple of months ago my daughter and I decided to give up our after dinner sweets (usually icecream or cookies or something similar) and it has been difficult. I've been eating stale leftover Christmas candy canes to compensate (like an alcoholic drinking the cooking sherry). They're small and I eat one or two, but they still do the trick. I ate the last one last night though.
When you're craving a Hershey bar, you might find that a couple of squares of very dark, high cocoa content chocolate will satisfy you as well. Or a glass of skim milk with a serving of Nestle's Quick powder. At least you're getting some calcium and protein that way. You might also try writing down your goals and reasons for losing weight and when you're craving the sweets, re-read your goals. Finally, if you just can't stand it, can you figure the amount of calories in a Hershey bar and cut that number of calories somewhere earlier in the day without sacrificing nutrition?
Good luck with it. I know it's hard.
Thank you, Marlow, and yes, you are right, I've received a lot of good input. Thank you everyone. I feel better just knowing how many other people struggle with the same things I am and offering information on what works and doesn't work for you.
You're a great bunch. It's been a pretty good week, foodwise. I've stuck to my plan and brought my breakfast and lunch items from home instead of saying "Oh, I'll just buy lunch today" and then the guys in my office say, "Hey, we're going to Five Guys, wanna come?".
And the weather has been cooperative--I work on the NJ side of the Hudson River, across from the World Trade Center Construction in Manhattan with the view the skyline, and there's a walkway over a mile long along the waterfront (it will eventually be connected to the others to become an 18-mile-long walkway) so I have a great opportunity for pleasant lunchtime walks.
I am being realistic, too. I'm not going to be as thin as I was when I was 25, but I have a goal to be at a healthier weight than I'm at now, and it's reasonable. I do think a lot of this is getting it all straight in my head.
The other things is that I'm done with parenting. I am divorced, only had one child, and she's going to be in her last year of college, will turn 21 soon, and is living in her own place in her school town three hours away. Maybe it's time to take this summer and focus on me and where I'm going next. Wherever it is, I want to go there in better shape than I am now!
I've been at this along time...I try to keep it real. It's best for me.
And it's not really that much different from the point of my original post. Yes, I DO like food, especially a lot of the foods that make me gain weight. Eating those foods is a source of pleasure, and so we're back to the original issue--my main source of pleasure in life is missing! I need to find other things to look forward to at the end of the day.
And it's not really that much different from the point of my original post. Yes, I DO like food, especially a lot of the foods that make me gain weight. Eating those foods is a source of pleasure, and so we're back to the original issue--my main source of pleasure in life is missing! I need to find other things to look forward to at the end of the day.
This is the key phrase finding other things too look forward to. Do you enjoy mystery novels? How about reading them on a nook in your garden at the end of a long work day? I joined a zumba class and it is soo fun! Ever considered joining a local running group? For example, I am in a Black Girls Run chapter in my city, and they dont put pressure on you to run, just to do what you can do and your best. Have a sweet craving? Try sugar free jello, or fat free jello pudding. I usually bring them to work ( long days as well) for a mid afternoon snack. Got pets? I got a silly puppy and he helps me maintain my weight loss goals, just by me having to walk him, and taking him to dog parks. While he's playing with other animals I do several walking laps.
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